Memorable/Hilarious nights out

Soldato
Joined
5 Apr 2009
Posts
6,163
Location
West Midlands
Seeing as nights out have been off the cards for a while now, I find it fun to reminisce! Anybody got any memorable or funny night out stories? Granted, the best nights usually aren't that memorable..

A couple immediately spring to mind:
When I was in university, my usual group and I attended a rave at the typical pitch black, grotty warehouse situated in the middle of an industrial estate. We'd been partying for a few hours when I noticed one of my friends was slightly worse for wear. Instead of facing the DJ, front and centre, he'd turned ninety degrees and was having what looked and sounded to be a considerable confrontation. That confrontation turned out to be with the wall. To which he was shouting "you Manc *******s!". Turned out he'd got a little confused after one too many beers and thought he was at Anfield, watching Liverpool play. Safe to say, once we realised this, we quickly scooped him up, cut our night slightly short and bundled ourselves in a cab home with him! He slept for about 16 hours and had forgotten all of it the next day!

For my first holiday abroad with my college mates, we went to Magaluf. Had the usual booze-fuelled night. Then I remember waking up the next morning on a bench slightly confused, no idea where I was. Checked my pockets - both empty, no phone and no wallet. Great! Managed to navigate my way back to the hotel, which took about three hours. Had to use the hotel phone and very embarrassingly ring my bank and ask them if they could cancel my card. Thankfully I only had about twenty euros in the wallet, so not holiday ruining. Returned back to the hotel to find another one of my mates had done the same thing!

Embellishment encouraged!
 
In Madrid for a concert and had spent the day imbibing and eating tapas. After the concert kicked out, my mate who had eaten a lot of patatas bravas and callos madrilenos along with a lot of beer, had a sudden overwhelming urge to lay some cable. He couldn’t hold it so found himself a doorway and did the deed. I should mention that this was a street in the middle of the red light district, and whilst he was about 10cm dilated, some hookers who he had goaded 100yds up the street (by placing his index and middle fingers either side of his mouth and sticking his tongue out and moving it around) walked past and started yelling at him, causing quite the fracas. This attracted police attention, who came over and said to him something along the lines of “you can’t leave that there”. He picked up what was a surprisingly large and firm log, and had to carry it until we were out of the view of the police. He chucked it in a bin.

The "10cm dilated" line got me! :D
 
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