If she can get past the lack of activity the game that surely fits the bill is Quakeworld, it ticks all the boxes apart from that:
-Very fast paced, a lot more so than Quake Live
-Definitely skill based with a very steep learning curve, although these skills are about more than just pure aim (resource management is a key element too due to the strength of the best items)
-Works well as a pure deathmatch game due to the frenetic pace (to be honest, coming from UT2K4 I suspect it could be quite overwhelming)
Although the community is very small now, there is a very active ffa server quake.xs4all.nl - looking at a stats monitoring site it's had over 37 million frags since the monitoring started about 3 years ago.
To get the most out of it however you really need to play TDM as that is the mode which makes it stand out in terms of depth of gameplay.
It's a pretty twitchy shooter (with vehicles and etc too) and it's completely free. You never have to spend a penny on it if you don't want. Money just gives cosmetic stuff or gets you weapon unlocks faster.
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