Poor man's fry-up

[Pate]

Yep, it was that time of morning when the birds were chirping, I was feeling rough and decided to try and cook a fry up.

Major problem was that I was lacking sausages, black pudding, hash browns etc, basically everything that makes a fry up.

So I stuffed what I could together.

Voila, a poor attempt at a fry up. Went down well enough with some tea and toast.

 

[Pate]

That was half an onion, it was just quite a big onion and I can't cut onion for **** haha.

I liked a bit more onion in this case because along with a tiny bit of chilli powder and a scrape of crushed black pepper, it gave the beans with the peppered potato thingys a nice set of flavour.

Contrasted well with the smoked bacon anyway.

 

[Pate]

Do you have some sort of aversion to spoons? This is the second thread of yours where you appear to be stirring your food with a knife.

We don't have any spoons that I would use to scrape food out for an animal with, let alone cook with.

I use one knife for everything, and a fork which I keep personally clean.

 

[Pate]

You should have made an omlette and had beans and potatoes on the side

Not sure how to make an omelette.

You can cook the top of fried eggs by just placing a pan lid over the top of them. Means you don't have to flip them and risk breaking them

That might work if I had a pan lid in the first place.

Seriously though, it's usually fine, I've got the knack to flippin with a knife usually. When I made this, not a lot of attention was being placed upon them.

 

[Pate]

You lost me the second you added onions. I HAAAAAATE onions.

Other than that looks pretty good.

So sad.

I shall have to cook you something without onions at some point.

Burst yokes

Indeed. First time it's happened. Ah well, life goes on.

Pick up a silicone spatula the next time you're in Morrisons/Sainsburys/Tesco etc. Roughly £2 and will save you knackering your pans or stabbing yourself in the face.

It will also improve your cooking. Amazingly.

Meh, I get by with a knife. I might treat myself to some kit at some point, but for now I'll survive.

 

[Pate]

Good effort, bet it cleared the hangover

If you have a grater, you could grate the potatoes and onion and make hash brown. Just fry it all up together until cooked through, plenty of salt and pepper, and it's much better than shop-bought

It certainly helped me feel less rough anyway.

Great idea on the hash browns, will try tomorrow and post results. So literally just grate both and fry together? wow.

OP is a student? I would've said ***** but even a ***** wouldn't eat anything cooked on that hob. As for using a metal knife on a non-stick coating .. tsch.

Student here. The hob isn't clean, in fact it's filthy, but then again I'm cooking my food in a pan, not actually on the hob so meh. At home I'm fastidiously clean.

And I doubt the pan gives a **** if I'm using a knife to be honest, it's a £1 special from somewhere. There is a really really nice pan floating around somwhere.......but somewhere isn't much use!

Why on earth would you put your beans in the pan? :/

Overdone eggs for the lose.

Saves washing up.

Overdone eggs were great thanks. Not a fan of runny eggs. Put everything as I cooked it in the oven which was heated.

 

[Pate]

Well, that just cheered me up.

Oi, I'm learning!

If you think that hobs bad you should see ours. It's a ****ing disgrace but there's no way i'm gonna be the one who cleans it again

Thank you. I cleaned up a fair bit at first, then after a while I just thought **** it. Not breaking my arse just for people to have the cheek to just leave dirty stuff around.

Keep plate, cup and fork in my room and the rest can go hang.

 

[Pate]

Beans should be in a pot. Overdone eggs with the yoak split yum.

They were not overdone in my opinion, I like it slighty crispy on each side. ^^

You were either very brave or very stupid to balance your poor man's fry-up on the top of the stairs. Could have gone clunkety-clunk to the bottom and left you with an empty stomach.

Nice try though

Would have cooked the eggs last. They must have been cold after the bacon was done.

Meh, it was the only clean place to take a finished photo. Also the eggs were not cold as I had the oven on, and everything went in there on the plate whilst I was waiting. Meal was hot, like the tea and me.

 

[Pate]

Make sure you squeeze the water out of the potatoes and onions before frying.
Just wrap them in a bit of kitchen paper and squeeze hard until water comes out (assuming you have some kitchen paper!)

Nice tip thanks.

I'd probably use a teatowel. But somehow I doubt he has a clean one...

I'd post a photo of our teatowel, but I think you might be a little grossed out....

 

[Pate]

Underpants? Perhaps not.

Now there's a thought. Bit of potato juice straining might look a bit odd though.

 

[Pate]

Even better if you use a ricer

Genuinely I thought ricers were a slang term for rubbishly modded cars.

Looks a decent breakfast, I'd eat it. I mean, if it was cooked in a sanitary kitchen.

I'm wondering if you used the leaflet as a chopping board...

In some ways I'm so glad I lived at home when I was at uni. Though I did have some friends with very, very clean student houses.

I indeed used the leaflet as a chopping board, far cleaner than the surfaces, and once it's used, just throw it in the bin.

 

[Pate]

get some cheaper olive oil in future and you may be able to afford some sausages!

Cheaper? It's hardly expensive, not to mention I was ****ed as a newt when I made the meal, so wasn't going to go to the shops to buy stuff, hence why I used what I had.

Stirring a non stick pan with metal? a sharp knife at that?

Thats one sure way to ruin a perfectly good pan!

It's not a nice pan. Believe me.

 

[Pate]

You are atrocious at cooking.

Have to third the knife on a pan thing.

meh