Short Snappy Jokes

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My little brother told me this today.

A man walks into a Library and says to the lady, 'Can I have a book on suicide?'

The lady replies, 'No you bloody can't, you wont bring it back!' :D

Post away your short jokes.
 
A crocodile walks into a bar and says to the barman, "a pint please.... and make it snappy".



:(
 
1.)
What's big white, heavy and stuck in a tree?

A fridge ;)

2.)
A sandwich walks in to a bar and ask's for a pint.

Barman so " sorry we don't serve food"

3.)
A horse walks into a bar

Barman says " why the long face?"

4.)
What do you call a man with no ankles?

Tony

5.)
What do you call a Deer with no eyes?

No eye-Deer

What do you call a Deer with no eyes and no legs?

Still No eye-Deer :D

:D
 
Last edited:
mctiny said:
5.)
What do you call a Deer with no eyes?

No eye-Deer

What do you call a Deer with no eyes and no legs?

Still No eye-Deer :D

:D

What fo you call a Deer with no eyes, no legs and no p3nis?
Still no ******* eye-deer
 
How much do Cockneys pay for shampoo?

Pantene!
____

Why is George Michael like a pair of wellies?

They've both been sucked off in bogs!
_____

What do you call a judge with no thumbs?

Justice Fingers!
_____

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

Nothing, you've already said it twice!
_____

Why do Anarchists only drink herbal tea?

Because Property is theft!
_____

*n
 
Two crocodiles walking down the street, one says to the other "Why the long face?"

Two cannibals eating a clown, one says to the other "Does this taste funny?"
 
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