Son of a ..... (part one)

[SB118]

... gun

Van is up for MOT tomorrow, so i thought i'd change the oil and filters, etc, to be sure of the emmisions test.

Dropped an engine wash in, ran it for an hour (spent that fun hour laying on the floor welding up the holes in the exhaust, i love MOT time ), drained the old oil out (i'd took out 7l, i'd only put in 5l, the joys of a fuel that can blow passed the rings!)

New filter on, fresh oil in, fired up the engine, pressure light went out, gave the engine a blip to get the engine quietened down and then i heard this gurgling, bubbling noise, wtf ? pretty sure i've not moved or kinked any water pipes.

Turn off the engine and looked under the lid, O M F G

The rubber o-ring gasket thingy on the new filter wasn't sealing it had, to put it politely, urinated oil sodding everywhere, side of the block, alternator, starter, brake servo, and then dumped the lot of it onto the floor under the engine oh testicles!

Tried to reseal it, but it didn't want to play (yup, it urinated more smegging oil onto the floor). Had to rob the gasket from the old filter, worked first try, but i had to fill the engine with the el cheapo nasty gunk that i buy in to fill the cars i'm selling with, bum.

And the wife thinks i'm wierd for nicking the fresh bag of cat litter to tidy up the lane with, mind you so do the neighbours

 

[kippermitten]

Oh man oily fun for....oh just you!

Ive done that with an A+ engine in my mini, a slight tap to the front of the metro the engine came out of bent the filter pipe/thread so when a new one went on, no seal just oil sprayed all over the inside of the engine bay and the driveway, deep joy. Not!

I sympathise, least you cleaned it up.

 

[fonzee]

lol ;0 unlucky... I can imagine the engine compartment was very messy...

My dad once was servicing his van and was changing the oil in a rush for some reason i forgotten... Anyway he drained the old oil from the sump and then puts the new stuff in... However, he forgot to put the sump plug back on... lmao it just went straight through!! He wondered why the oil level wasnt going up...

 

[zain]

ouch and lol at the mod editing the bad words

 

[AndrewP]

My last oil change was a bit smoother than that, but I dropped the old filter as I was taking it off - it then proceeded to defy gravity and hurl itself into the bowl of used oil - splash!

Didn't think of using the cat litter to clean up with, just used sand. Could have been in trouble, my mum works for SEPA!

 

[Simon]

I quote this from another forum, made me laugh about annoying the neighbours

"Oh my god! My gearbox finally burst into an oily smokey noisy grindy mess a couple of days ago after 6 months or so of whining. I was doing about 70-80 on the A38 and it started getting bloody noisy, then grinding, then it started juddering and losing me power. When i tried to knock it down a gear it wouldnt let me out of gear, then it wouldnt let me back into gear and the gear knob itself was getting red hot ( ) so i decided it was best to pull over, lol. looking into the rear view mirror saw a healthy cloud of blue smoke engulfing the cars behind...eek...gearbox must have been a little bit hot then. Handily, i found a layby. I popped the bonnet and when the smell hit me i was nearly sick! ** me, i had to walk away to phone the RAC, it wreaked, i felt so ill! Imagine fresh cat-pi$s x500000, then add a load of gas and you're half way there, lol.

Anyway, started repairing the car the other night with muchos help from sir Matt P (cheers) but 1st we had to get it onto the drive. Managed to find reverse, but finding 1st to get it on the drive found a bit more difficult, eh matt?! This involved burning some more oil before giving up and popping out a driveshaft to push it onto the drive, spuing oil on the road. Then we drained all the oil into a bowl. all hell broke loose. Neibhours wandering about shouting about the smell, thinking the world weas blowing up, people down the road calling emergency gas lines, my driving instructor 2 doors down had to sleep with olbas oil on a tissue in his nose lol! My sister couldnt sleep, my drive still stinks, about 3 neibhours a day still calling gas emergency repair lines, even though the oil is contained and the gearbox has gone!

Speaking of which, matt text me about his stinky car with 4 new air fresheners...and his smelly house even though the empty 'box is down the side of his garage...

How much smell can 2 litres of oil make?! Its ridiculous!"

 

[SB118]

WOOT! Straight through 2 years on the trot, on an annual maintenance budget of just under £30

Transit 4tw