Spider on the Face

Nitefly · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:25

Alas.

Whilst lying on a bed on the phone, sharing what I would deem most manly of rugged of banter to my female companion, I felt a tingling on my neck which slowly moved to my face. At this point, I had realised that I was not in fact on earth, but had been somehow transported to hell, at the cruel mercy of the vile Beelzebub. I let out a most mighty roar (a girlish scream) and saw what appeared to be a blurring fast object making its way under my bedsheets.

I then requested my friend came and removed the offending object. As he did so, it wriggled across the sheets prompting an even manlier roar. The result being that said item was (apparently) removed and said friend was forced to check the room many, many times.

Yes, I have had a house spider, on my face. I feel raped. To get across my terror, I quote that it was "not small" from the intervening third party. And I sit in the same bed... waiting for it for its second vicious attack.

So, has anyone else had a spider on the face, and, more importantly, how long do I have left to live?

Ben M · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:27

Well it's from Clifton, so it was probably wondering why a lowly, broke, filthy student was in its bed.

JBuk · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:27

I woke up in the early hours the other week and I could feel a tingling sensation on my forehead, the tingle then started to move down towards my cheeks,so I felt my face and there was a huge spider crawling on me, I was too tired to bother about it so I just threw it into the darkness and went back to sleep

G-MAN2004 · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:28

Oh God, I remember when this happened to me whilst I was trying to sleep, and it crawled over my lips. Never kept the window open at night since.

Nitefly · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:28

Ben M said:
Well it's from Clifton, so it was probably wondering why a lowly, broke, filthy student was in its bed.

Actually, I'm in Filton today... which makes a lot of sense.

Hades · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:28

Why was your bed on your phone?

Ben M · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:28

G-MAN2004 said:
Oh God, I remember when this happened to me whilst I was trying to sleep, and it crawled over my lips. Never kept the window open at night since.

Ah, the rare flying spider? I know it well.

Nitefly said:
Actually, I'm in Filton today... which makes a lot of sense.

Indeed it does. Are you living in Clifton again this year, or have you moved to Filton?

G-MAN2004 · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:30

Ben M said:
Ah, the rare flying spider? I know it well.

Spiders can crawl through the window, and then up the bed, you know?

Nitefly · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:30

Hades said:
Why was your bed on your phone?

I have an old handset from the early 1990s. My mattress fits on it quite perfectly.

wannabedamned · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:30

Nitefly · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:31

Ben M said:
Indeed it does. Are you living in Clifton again this year, or have you moved to Filton?

As if I would move to Filton!

Yes, Clifton. Different house though

EdGey · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:32

haha i hate spiders so much.

never had one on my face, but i often scream and dive off my computer chair cos one crawls up the back next to my monitor. they are never small either.

JBuk · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:35

EdGey said:
haha i hate spiders so much.

never had one on my face, but i often scream and dive off my computer chair cos one crawls up the back next to my monitor. they are never small either.

The chances are there has been quite a few crawled over your face while you're sleeping, you've just never woke up

Things change I've changed · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:45

JBuk said:
The chances are there has been quite a few crawled over your face while you're sleeping, you've just never woke up

Isn't it true that on average we swallow about two spiders a year without even being aware of it ?, or is that just an old wives tale ?, come to think of it what vitamins are in spiders ? lol

Kreeeee · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:46

Bristol has some weird spiders =/

Nitefly · 7 Jul 2009 at 00:46

lowrider007 said:
Isn't it true that on average we swallow about two spiders a year without even being aware of it ?, or is that just an old wives tale ?

Nope, I've seen the paper in nature.

They locked a sample of people up in various rooms for 50 years and went through all the video footage from multiple angles to find the facts.

What do you think?

Van Hellseek · 7 Jul 2009 at 01:00

spider rape :eek:

loltim · 7 Jul 2009 at 01:03

jak731 · 7 Jul 2009 at 01:03

Never knowingly had one on my face before, although the average person apparantly unwittingly eats about 7 through out their lifetime (while asleep).

I have found these around my house before though :eek:

Fortunately spiders don't bother me, see them as a good thing, eat flies and all.

gurusan · 7 Jul 2009 at 01:05

isn't there some sort of urban myth that the average human eats 7-10 spiders in their sleep during their lifetimes?