Man of Honour
- Joined
- 5 Jun 2003
- Posts
- 91,986
- Location
- Falling...
Indeed it's nice that it gets light around 6am now so much more agreeable.
The Happy thread - Positive posts only :-)
- Thread starter Feek
- Start date
Soldato
- Joined
- 14 Jun 2004
- Posts
- 8,153
i tried to cheer up some peaple with 2 jokes, and im hoping to have a positive chat with some one later, which may result in something getting shredded..
My wife just phoned me, and the conversation went like this:
Her: “You know that Gladiator movie that I got you for Christmas…?”
Me: “Yeah.”
Her: “Wind it forward one hour, 16 minutes and 28 seconds.”
Me: “Right, I’ve done that.”
Her: “Okay, you see the gladiator at the front fighting the lion…?”
Me: “I can see that, yeah.”
Her: “Just behind him, there are two gladiators having a sword fight with each other…?”
Me: “Okay, I see them.”
Her: “Well, behind those two, on the left-hand side of the screen, there’s a gladiator holding a spear…?”
Me: “Yes…! I can see him.”
Her: “Right…! Those are the sandals I want for my birthday.”
I went to get a haircut the other day, and the barber kept asking me the same question over and over.
As he’s cutting my hair, he says, “So, how’s your mother-in-law doing?”
I shrugged and said, “She’s fine.”
Five minutes later, he asks again, “So, how’s your mother-in-law?”
Now I’m getting annoyed, but I answer, “I told you, she’s fine.”
A few minutes after that, he asks yet again, “So, how is your mother-in-law doing?”
I finally snap: “Dude, I already told you twice—she’s fine! Why do you keep asking about my mother-in-law?”
He chuckles and says, “Oh, don’t worry, it’s not because I actually care. Every time I mention your mother-in-law, your hair stands straight up… and it makes it a lot easier for me to cut it!”
i wish these were mine but from Reddit at least
My wife just phoned me, and the conversation went like this:
Her: “You know that Gladiator movie that I got you for Christmas…?”
Me: “Yeah.”
Her: “Wind it forward one hour, 16 minutes and 28 seconds.”
Me: “Right, I’ve done that.”
Her: “Okay, you see the gladiator at the front fighting the lion…?”
Me: “I can see that, yeah.”
Her: “Just behind him, there are two gladiators having a sword fight with each other…?”
Me: “Okay, I see them.”
Her: “Well, behind those two, on the left-hand side of the screen, there’s a gladiator holding a spear…?”
Me: “Yes…! I can see him.”
Her: “Right…! Those are the sandals I want for my birthday.”
I went to get a haircut the other day, and the barber kept asking me the same question over and over.
As he’s cutting my hair, he says, “So, how’s your mother-in-law doing?”
I shrugged and said, “She’s fine.”
Five minutes later, he asks again, “So, how’s your mother-in-law?”
Now I’m getting annoyed, but I answer, “I told you, she’s fine.”
A few minutes after that, he asks yet again, “So, how is your mother-in-law doing?”
I finally snap: “Dude, I already told you twice—she’s fine! Why do you keep asking about my mother-in-law?”
He chuckles and says, “Oh, don’t worry, it’s not because I actually care. Every time I mention your mother-in-law, your hair stands straight up… and it makes it a lot easier for me to cut it!”
i wish these were mine but from Reddit at least