The joys of squash

Soldato
Joined
25 Jan 2003
Posts
11,550
Location
Newark, Notts
Thought i'd share my conquest with you all as i've got time to kill before i hit the sack for a bit of zelda.

For the past few months i've been playing in the squash leagues at the local leisure centre. In the first month i got placed in the 5th division (2nd from bottom), and i got moved down to the 6th after a record of 3 losses, 1 win and a default. The next month i managed to get back up into division 5 again after a couple of wins and 2 losses.

Now i've just started my return to division 5 this week, and I won my first game 3-2. I should have won it 3-0 really but i lost concentration and managed to bang my funny bone on the door as I grabbed a drink partway through. Played through the pain though and came out with the win.

Now, tonight I played a guy who beat the above guy 3-0. That guy warned me that this guy was in his 50's and wasn't the fittest, but had the shots. Every few points he was stopping and saying "1 second please", and putting his head down panting. It was happening quite regularly but I thought i'll just leave him to it since I'd gone 1-0 up.

Next game he starts complaining about how he's pulled a muscle, and yet again he has to take a couple of minutes to stretch. Now when a squash game is only 40 minutes, I was starting to get a little annoyed. After 20 minutes i'd gone 2-0 up, and he really began to play up. In the 3rd game he went off the court twice still complaining about his muscles. I kept checking the clock and started to give him a few hints "you ready?" etc. In this game he annoyed me so much, I just lost all concentration and threw it away at 8-8 and he took the game.

I looked at the clock, 10 minutes left. At the pace things were going it was clear we were only gonna get one more game in, if any. I went a few points up then asked for a let on one point, he didn't agree and said since I went for the ball it was his point (i actually caught the ball with my racket and it went down but he was blatently in my way), so I thought fair enough, get on with it, 7/8 minutes left. From here he decided to stop and explain the rules to me for two minutes.

Now i'm not the confrontational or argumentitive type (well i am, but not to people I dont know, especcially when he's almost 40 years my senior, just polite I guess), but I was really starting to get ****** off. I play to win and I'm extremely competitive. I can take not losing if its fair but this was getting ridiculous.

I started to lose it, I rushed every shot and he went 7-5 up (2-1 to me in games if you're still following). 3 minutes left.

I was now in two minds. I wanted to win 3-1 (more points for a 3-1 win compared to a 2-1), but i would have killed someone, him probably, if he managed to pull off a 2-2. So i couldn't decide whether to waste a bit of time myself and take the 2-1, or just go for it and risk the draw.

So its 7-5 to him, I played the lob of my life and killed the ball in the back corner to win serve back. 2 minutes left.

From here I think I just gained some crazy adreneline from somewhere, and I served so hard I couldn't see the ball in the air it went that fast. He completely missed it and screamed the court down. Now dont ask me how or why he didn't continue to "ask for a second" in these last two minutes, but he didn't. I then smacked him yet again with three ridiculously fast serves which he could barely return and I took the game, upon winning the last point i chucked my racket on the floor and the lights went off. I couldn't have timed it better.

We sat down after the game and I told him how ****** off i'd have been if i lost that last game, and he admitted he was being a **** and couldn't keep up with me fitness-wise so he tried his best to play for time.

Bit of a long essay for one game of squash, but I was so chuffed that i'd got one over on him when i won that last game. Upto now everyone i've playeds been pretty fair, but this guy was something else on the court (nice guy off).

So yeh, rock on! :D
 
Nice one...glad you managed to beat the *****. I played this older guy once, out in the Middle East. I was about 35, he was about 60. He turned out to be fit as a butcher's dog and an excellent player. I was well and truly thrashed. :o

Fully mask your swearing please

Gilly
 
11 matches unbeaten in my squash tournament (but i've only won about 5 of those). Really is a demanding game. I'm glad we can only book courts for 40 minutes at my gym! :D
 
I used to play a lot in my first year of uni, but I've only played one game since starting my second year due to rugby, lectures and generally not having enough time. I'm planning to start playing again in the new year, it's a really awesome game :)
 
Is it hard to get into folks? I would love to give it a go but the last time i did, a few years ago, i was totally useless at it!

I remember hitting the ball as hard as i could and it not bouncing at all!! :p

Any advice for a total beginner?
 
Yucca said:
Is it hard to get into folks? I would love to give it a go but the last time i did, a few years ago, i was totally useless at it!

I remember hitting the ball as hard as i could and it not bouncing at all!! :p

Any advice for a total beginner?

I'd say it's one of the easiest sports to get into. I'd get down a gym with a friend who plays and get him to teach you the basics, and then play gently against you so you get your technique built up.

Be warned, your wrist will cane after a session for the next day if you hit the ball hard. It's worth it though.

Also, you may want to start with a blue dot, or single yellow dot ball, as they're easier to bounce with less power and they warm up quicker, so before your wrist is built up enough for the double yellow, you can still get it bouncing.

Just so you know, the balls don't bounce much until they're warm from being hit, then they begin to.
 
Squash is a great game. I used to paly lots. Its a great combination of skill, tactics and speed/stamina. Its very involving to play.
 
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