Valentine's Day for beginners

[qwerty]

Ok, it's the first time I've ever 'celebrated' Valentine's Day and I've got no idea where to start. Here's a few specific questions I've been wondering about, but any general tips would be helpful:

1) What do you write in the card!? Happy Valentine's Day? Best Wishes? How do you sign it? Argh!!
2) What type of present is acceptable? I've seen Father of the Bride and I still don't understand why Annie is so offended when she receives the blender (if someone could explain, I'd be grateful) but I don't want to make this kind of mistake.

I'm sure I'll think of more annoying questions. Btw, feel free to end your answers with 'you moron' or 'you ignoramus' etc. I really should know what I'm doing at my age.

 

[qwerty]

I would suggest this card:


along with a pack of condoms and some lube. Girls love it when you get straight to the point tbh.

EDIT: Flibster beat me to it

fini

Why the lube? I'm not a gay.

 

[qwerty]

Oh you innocent little boy

Well I don't see the need for it...my girl 'brings her own'...

 

[qwerty]

It's for the 15th though, because I'm still a poor student and I didn't fancy paying double prices for the special privilege of doing it on the 14th.

Yeah, I win on that point too. The old girl's on a school trip to Berlin for the week of Valentine's Day so we do it when she gets back. The downside is she'll probably be having ruthlessly efficient German sex on the 14th.

 

[qwerty]

Why not have a special day? The most thoughtful gifts are cheap anyway!

Besides, it gives those who don't do show some appreciation often enough a kick of the backside and show they care!

Ooh, a girl!

So if a girl says in a throwaway manner, while passing an expensive chocolate shop "They look lovely" (or something similar, I wasn't really paying attention) does that mean she would like them?

 

[qwerty]

Yes

And make a card to go with them

You mean make a card thats meant to look like a heart but ends up looking like my left testicle because my co-ordination is that of a four year old on caffeine? I think I'll just fork out the £3.99 for a card from WHSmith

Thanks for the girl help though

 

[qwerty]

Valentines cards are supposed to be anonymous.

Is this true? That's a potential area to screw up...

 

[qwerty]

Im sending a card with this poem wrote on it to my ex to see if I cant stair up any feelings. (Not my poem but think it hits the right spot)

You whom i love
Forever and ever
You are the deadly rose
In my life
The rose
Sweetly smelling
The rose
A sight of pure beauty
You are the rose
So deceiving to my eyes
With petals
Like silk
With thorns
Like nails
I tired to embrace you
But you only pierced my heart
You made me bleed
Because i loved you
No matter how much i bleed
I will always love you.

My gf's been getting things like this from her ex and she says it just makes her cry...in a bad way.

 

[qwerty]

If it was your poem then fair enough - shows your deep anguish. But it's just some generic you-dumped-me-now-i-feel-crap poem written by someone else. This is why I hate James Blunt - I don't g.a.f. about your problems mate!

 

[qwerty]

Another question. I got her this:

http://www.badtastebears.com/gallery/numbered/valentino

You lot probably won't understand but hopefully she will...and I got her more traditional stuff too.

But the question is are you supposed to wrap the presents? And if so, do they make Valentine's wrapping paper?

 

[qwerty]

Alright mate,

Right then (cracks fingers) you wanna do something different, maybe something you don't normally do. Take time to really impress her. Maybe think back to where and when you met. Unless you met her on a 345 bus going to peckham. That wouldn't be all that romantic really.

I would buy a card, maybe some flowers (does she have a favourite type?).
I know everybody will be doing that or choclates, but hey do someting special later.

In the card tell her how you feel about her. stuff like that...things that genuinely make you tick when you are together and how much it makes you feel alive and dance with the hares, naked on a march morning. Ahem......Just generally be yourself.

Three options:

1) You go for the meal, somewhere special, do the valentines thing. Then go back for a nice massage, maybe some oils, nice candle burning. Put some effort in, then have some bedroom gymnastics. Oh and don't fall asleep after, have a chat for a bit. Belissimo! your in the good books for a week.

2) You stay in cook a nice meal. Not egg and chips, something you might never cook. Thai is pretty easy. Red or green curry? Maybe plan a few courses. For the price of a meal out on V-Day you make something top at home. Then maybe go for a walk, if you have somewhere nice to go, where you won't get mugged. The come back and do the massage thing.

3) go with flini's option the card the condoms and the lube.

Cheers

B


um think I got the wrong end of the stick....so this is a girl you wanna date, not a girl you are actually with.

B*ll*x.....ok then card is enough with your number in it.........plan something to do together, if she calls you do it, if she doesn't you don't. Bellisimo!



cheers

B

No, you had the right end of the stick, I'm already with her!

That was a very useful post, thank you. It seems we're still at the stage where we do that every time we're together anyway, so I'll do the same but bigger!

And I never fall asleep afterwards.