Washed-up Cartoon Characters

[MR_Punk]

I got this idea from Family Guy and I've just been writing things down last night and tonight. It's late so I thought I'd post them here so and stragglers that are about might have a laugh or might not. I expect criticism so don't be holding back. I also expect you to call me loopy but I'm a happy camper!

The Ballad of Elroy Jetson

It was the summer of 84 and the final Jetson season had just finished filming. He got into a little problem where he owed a little bit of money to the wrong person. This person ended up making him sell his cocaine for him. Elroy turned to taking the drugs himself and stole quite a lot.

He had to runaway to Colombia where he got married to a young girl, turns out this young girl was into all this voodoo malarky and when they had a falling out she cast a spell on Elroy which meant he could never leave the country and would be forced to stay with her forever, he tried to escape but when he got to the border he was shot down by the drug dealer he was originally running away from. he was buried in a porpers grave with no one there except a vicar and a local mourner.

He died alone and very sad.

The other cast of the Jetsons were informed and said they would make a memorial to him at a future reunion, that reunion never happened.

Charlie Brown went a step too far

Rumours were that he was unhappy that Snoopy was getting all of the attention, it was the 80's when he hit his late teens which were the dark times for him.Drugs became part of his life, the more he took the more he wanted. The stuff he gave snoopy was dirty, Snoopy didn't want to take it but thought it would keep Charlie happy. That was what he overdosed on it was horrible, a bad dealer Charlie said but we all know he was jealous of how popular snoopy was getting. The charges were never brought down on Charlie and he went free.

The last i heard though was that he were in a good place, just got out of rehab and turned to religion and has started a charity for cartoon characters on drugs, he never managed to get Elroy Jetson in there before his untimely death but he has been working hard to keep Bart Simpson clean over the past few years.

I suppose there was a silver lining to that story although Snoopy will be greatly missed.

Scrappy Doo and Fred show their dark sides

Well we all knew Scrappy was too eager to fight the bad guys. The gang were after a bad guy and he bite a suspect without even thinking. It turns out the suspect who will not be named wasn't doing anything wrong and had friends in high places. He sued Scrappy for quite a large amount of money, Shaggy and Daphne agreed that scrappy should no longer accompany them on there adventures. Throughout the case Scrappy showed no remorse for his actions and said he would do it again without blinking and eye.

Fred who stood up for Scrappy throughout the case wanted scrappy there and ended up beating up his then lover Daphne to a bloody pulp in a drug filled sex rampage.Fred too had a dark side. He was seeing Velma behind Daphnes back for years, Velma was just too scared to say anything as she was aware of the dark side he had. He liked dressing up in the bedroom in chains and often beat Velma to within an inch of her life and blamed the bruises and cuts on her being careless and falling down too often.

Scooby was allegedly caught taking a scooby snack from Fred one day when Shaggy walked in the room. They didn't talk much after that.

The rise and demise and re-rise of Fred Flintstone

Well after Hanna-Barbera finished on there last series Fred found himself out of work. He'd earn quite a small fortune though and become a global superstar,as you can well imagine, he was the tubby guy who everyone loved.

He did get quite tired of being the fat guy everyone new though. He ended up staying at home all day with the curtains drawn and only his old records to keep him company. The stress took the toll on him and he started to lose his hair until there were only a few strands left. So he turned to drink, Wilma couldn't stop him. After 20 years of this his liver failed, he got a transplant because of his money, but was told he would be forever jaundice though.

wilma got him into rehab and ended up getting him back to being happy. He kept his soft spot for alcohol but now only drank beer. He got himself plastic surgery to change the way his face looked as not to be recognised by the people who used to respect him.

He then realised it was time to get back into acting and auditioned to a new family sitcom. He got the part as the dad of an average American family. This was 1989.

19 years later he is a world known actor again but not under his real name but under the moniker of Homer Simpson.

All facts are made up of course and none of it is true for those who still like cartoons!

 

[MR_Punk]

I'm thinking Yogi Bear and bestiality for the next one.

 

[MR_Punk]

Your horrible writing style and awful English make me hate you, makes baby jesus cry and makes God kill kittens, all at once.

Hate's a bit harsh but my writing style is much to be desired, my A-Level English Lecturer would be so disappointed.

 

[MR_Punk]

I was sleeping with the Teacher, I really enjoy creating little stories and blogs on such but I am utterly useless with spelling and grammar.

 

[MR_Punk]

Why are they that weird?

 

[MR_Punk]

I did spell check using firefox.

I assume you spelling chequer wrong is a little dig too

 

[MR_Punk]

Not to be deterred I have created another one if anyone cares to read:

The tail of Yogi Bear

It was the fall of 1961. Yogi Bear (the series) was right in its prime. Yogi was getting fame and fortune everywhere he turned. Boo Boo was as well getting fame and fortune but not quite to the extent that Yogi was getting.

To fill his spare time Boo Boo had started doing odd things. He begin to do a little Taxidermy, collecting dead animals that he found in and around the sets of the Yogi Bear show. Nothing too odd here I hear you cry.

So back to the fall of '61, after a rather hot day of filming. Yogi and Boo Boo decided to get a nice cold bear in a local bar. Soon after they arrived into the bar Ranger Smith entered the bar. Now as you are all aware the rivalry between Smith and the two bears was not something just shared on screen but in real life too.

Smith downed Whiskey after Whiskey and soon became quite drunk. He then started hurling abuse towards Yogi and Boo Boo. The barman asked Smith to leave and as he was leaving he pulled a knife out. Locals in the bar jumped towards Smith but before they could wrestle him to the ground he managed to cut Yogi. The cut was a little below the waist line and cut off a large part of Yogi's tail.

Yogi was rushed to a nearby medical facility but it was too late the tail had died and could not be reattached to Yogi's body. Boo Boo had an idea. For Yogi's birthday that year he gave Yogi a fully reproduction of his lost tail. Yogi was a little freaked out by the present but knew Boo Boo had good intentions.

They are still best friends to this day and bought a couple of cottages in Jelleystone Park where they spend most summers together. Smith was sentenced to 8 years in county jail for his attack on Yogi but was released after only serving 3 years on good behaviour but was given a permanent restraining order on Yogi and Boo Boo. Nothing has been heard of Smith for a long time, he is presumed to have moved down south to start a new life.

 

[MR_Punk]

one spelling mistake isn't that bad.

 

[MR_Punk]

It's right in my head.

 

[MR_Punk]

Wow people actually liked them, I'll post them as they are created.

 

[MR_Punk]

Awesome - someone else like me.

 

[MR_Punk]

Happy endings would mean they aren't washed up though. Here's today's offering.

Top Cats met his top dog.

After its original run Top Cat ended in 1962. In 1965 after a long set of negotiation's T.C and the Gang decided to get back together and complete another series. The only downside was that Officer Dibble had to leave the series after only 6 episodes due to a conflict in his timetable with other acting jobs he had.

Dibble was replaced by a new mean Officer named Cartwright, Cartwright was an old fashioned actor and would make the crew re-shoot scene time after time until he thought they were correct. T.C and the rest of the team were fed up of working such long hours. Top Cat eventually brought up the courage to stand upto Cartwright and tell him he was the star and he called the shots.

A swift right hook later left Top Cat knocked down, the brawl that followed was not a pretty sight but it ended up with Cartwright having several broken bones from Top Cat and his friends.

Cartwright sued Top Cat and the rest of the crew for damages Top Cat would not back down, it just wasn't in his nature and lost the case which in total came to twice the original budget for the series. The filming stopped and T.C was downhearted. Funding was not found of the following years and Top Cat now works in a small convenience store earning minimum wage.

 

[MR_Punk]

Here is Fridays offering to you all:

Popeye didn’t like his greens either.

Around ten years after Popeye went out of syndication, Popeye had started to enter weight lifting contests, apparently still getting his power from his beloved spinach. Tournament after tournament were won. For several years Popeye seemed to be untouchable, each time he ate his spinach he became apparently the strongest man alive.

Fast forward to the spring of 1983 and the first ever World Strongest Man contest held in Canada. This was also to be the first weight lifting contest that would have random drug tests. Up until now taking body enhancing drugs was only really frowned upon but it would now become an offence which would mean immediate expulsion from the weight lifting scene.

Popeye strolled through the qualifying rounds, each time using his trusty spinach to give him that extra little help that he needed to beat the other competitors. To the finals and just as he was about to take on Bluto in the Atlas Stones contest, one of the drug testers got hold off one of Popeye’s now infamous cans of spinach. He decided to test it. It was off the charts, it consisted of many band products and lots, and I’m talking lots of steroids.

Popeye was banned for life from the Weightlifting scene, shamed forever. He now uses what is left of his money travelling round the world in his little dingy trying to escape the shame bestowed upon him for cheating.

 

[MR_Punk]

No more until you give me some stars god dammit lol. Going out tonight but I have a great one lined up about Richy Rich

 

[MR_Punk]

Here's today's offer.

Richie lost his Riches

In 1986 the Rich family were investigated for tax evasion. Apparently Mr Rich had been under paying his taxes for quite a long time. The some of money that he owed the government was alarmingly high. So much so that Mr Rich had to declare himself bankrupt. They were moved out of there mansion and had to slum in a small two bedroomed house in the suburbs. This was too much for Mr Rich has he could not bear to be poor and live with the rest of us normal people. So he took his own life.

This was all a huge shock to the then young Richie. He was thrown from his rich lavish lifestyle to the bottom layer of society. He was now dressing in second hand clothes and the smile had definitely fallen from his usually bright face.

Richie decided by the time he was ready for high school that he was going to get himself back on his feet. He worked hard and got a degree in Finance and Accounting. Now Richie always had been interested in stocks and shares. He had what little money he had left and put it in several up and coming business’ which turned his little sum of money into millions and then billions.

Richie Rich is now the 4th richest man in the world and devote lots of his life to charity, he moved back into his childhood mansion where he lives happily.

Richie always makes sure his taxes are paid on time and in full.