When does sensible advice become victim-blaming?

I see this in the same way as driving a car. If you go out driving care-free and don't do it with some respect and fear for other road users you'll soon end up in trouble with the police or have some sort of accident. There's books, adverts and active policing to make us think "yeah, let's pay attention and not end up hurting ourselves, someone else or getting in trouble" and for good reason. We have no problem with these warnings in general bar the most arrogant and ignorant, whether we like it or not.

So why can't it apply in this case? It's about taking personal responsibility. We might be the safest driver in the world but other people change those variables so it makes sense to leave something in-hand by thinking about the advice and warnings. So why can't we tell people to take more care about their well being when out and about at the most vulnerable times so they have a safer mind set? Just because there's some ambiguity for blame for those who have been in an unfortunate position? Just like you're more able to stop hitting that child if you're doing 30 not 40, you're less likely to get raped if you are of a sound state and stick with your friends and in safe places.

I guess the problem is everyone is in a bubble until something bad happens to themselves or someone close to them and so they only care when it's too late. There will be victims who will wish they had been more careful and be upset by that tweet but that's tough tbh. If that tweet makes a few more people be more responsible for themselves they can save themselves or a friend a lifetime of pain. It's a lesson learnt the hard way but one that needs to be learnt. We can't be afraid to say things how they should be for those who made the mistakes already.
 
The problem here is blame carries the connotation that it is exclusive, that if someone is to blame, it absolves others of blame and/or responsibility.

Is it irresponsible to get/let your friends get so utterly blasted that they become vulnerable? Yes. Absolutely.

Is it irresponsible to be the person that gets that blasted (assuming they haven't been spiked or whatnot) that they can no longer make rational decisions and/or end up in vulnerable situations? Yes. Absolutely.

Does any of the above detract from the blame of any attackers/pick-pockets/muggers/perverts/etc? No. Absolutely not.

And just lol at the people claiming it's just simple to avoid getting hammered or that you should just not walk home alone once drunk. Yeah, because life is just that easy and simple.

I used to bounce at some pretty busy bars that stayed open until morning and I can assure you this kind of situation happens a lot. So many people crawling out at closing that got separated from their group and it was too crowded and/or too drunk to find them again. Handbags/wallets/phones get stolen (sometimes under threat of violence,) or lost and bingo... No money for a cab or even the bus and no way to contact anyone means it's the long walk for you. Sure your friend(s) might be able to bail you out but given most at these places are students or younger money is scarce already. So it happens. A lot.

You might only do it the once because of a lack of planning on your part, or even just life experience to tell you these things happen, but it's just the once is all it takes for your plans to fall apart and it gets hairy.
 
I think it's political. Any sensible advice that would reduce the chance of women being raped is immediately raged at and forced away. It obviously has nothing to do with "blaming the victim" because the same thing is not done to sensible advice that would reduce the chance of other bad things happening to anyone.

"Cui bono?" is generally a good place to start. Raging at and suppressing sensible advice to reduce the chance of women being raped will, obviously, increase the number of women being raped. So who benefits from more women being raped? Rapists and feminists. It's not usually rapists who are raging against sensible advice to reduce the chance of women being raped.
 
I think part of it is that for decades/centuries Women who have been raped have had to put up with people, including at times the Police uttering variants of "well she shouldn't have been dressed like that/been there/been out alone/been out that time of night", so there is for some an almost instinctual reaction to anything that even hints that a woman could have done something differently and avoided it, even when the advice would apply equally to any crime committed against the person or simply the environmental risks you face when drunk and alone.

I would never blame the victim, as the blame for a crime lies on the perpetrator, however knowing the criminals are out there I would always advise taking steps to prevent being an easier victim (lock doors, close windows, don't get so drunk you're easy to steal from).
 
We have a political environment where women who are drunk are suddenly relieved of all personal responsibility when it comes to anything related to sex - consensual or not. If a man and women get drunk together and end up sleeping together consensually the man can later get into bother as the woman might be considered by the authorities as being 'incapable of consenting' - but the man has no such incapacity.
The same woman with the same level of intoxication however, if she got in a car and drove would have the book thrown at her. Go figure.
 
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