Windscreen washers.....

merlin · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:15

Nope not the plastic jet thingies - I'm talking about the immigrant kind.

I'd have thought **** OFF was a pretty universal phrase, but these guys seem impervious to it.

Just how do you get rid of them?

paradigm · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:18

Its simple, you use your plastic jet thingies when they go to "wash" your windscreen.

I usually find a facefull of washer fluid is enough to make them go to the next car if "no thanks" fails.

merlin · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:19

Hmm, sounds good - I wonder if I could spice the washer fluid up with that something....extra....

mrk · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:19

KKK outfit.

numnutz · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:20

Get washer fluid and brake fluid bottles mixed and top the washer fluid up with brake fluid? Obv not the other way round

merlin · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:21

mrk said:
KKK outfit.

Lol, I can't see the Polish getting overly concerned about that.

paradigm · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:21

merlin said:
Hmm, sounds good - I wonder if I could spice the washer fluid up with that something....extra....

Yes, you can urinate in it for extra immigrant pleasing flavour.

mrk · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:23

merlin said:
Lol, I can't see the Polish getting overly concerned about that.

Polish? Oh I thought you meant the other kind :O

paradigm · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:25

First of all, be sure they are actually Polish. If they are, then call them Slovenian or Slovakian. They all hate to be associated with each other.

All the Slovaks I know HATE to be called Polish

So I guess "**** OFF you dumb Slovenian ****WIT" might stop him washing your windscreen, but then again, it may make him want to punch you in the ovaries.

Conscript · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:33

Run them over. Keyboard use optional.

Skii · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:52

They seem to home in on me, and no amount of 'no thanks' and 'I said no thanks' and 'Look I don't have any change and I don't need my windscreen cleaning' has any effect at all.

I nearly got out of my car and belted the last one purely as he just wouldn't go away.

One of the many reasons why I can't stand driving into London (or any mode of transport there to be honest)

Skii · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:54

paradigm said:
First of all, be sure they are actually Polish. If they are, then call them Slovenian or Slovakian. They all hate to be associated with each other.

All the Slovaks I know HATE to be called Polish

So I guess "**** OFF you dumb Slovenian ****WIT" might stop him washing your windscreen, but then again, it may make him want to punch you in the ovaries.

this is the issue, I'm wary of insulting anyone who is standing next to my car bodywork with any kind of implement in their hands, for obvious reasons..

Ucof · 2 Jul 2009 at 13:55

Ignore them, let them wash the screen, when they come for money tell them that by law you don't have to pay for unsolicited goods or services.

Then use the windscreen wipers to clear their spit from your now shiney clean windscreen.

Lethagized · 2 Jul 2009 at 14:14

Let them clean it then drive off. Don't forget to say thanks

Berger · 2 Jul 2009 at 14:21

numnutz said:
Get washer fluid and brake fluid bottles mixed and top the washer fluid up with brake fluid? Obv not the other way round

Wont do your paintwork much good!

Sin_Chase · 2 Jul 2009 at 14:24

RobRX-7 said:
Let them clean it then drive off. Don't forget to say thanks

+1

Peño · 2 Jul 2009 at 14:36

RobRX-7 said:
Let them clean it then drive off. Don't forget to say thanks

I had some scabby Romanians wash my windscreen at the lights last weekend. She asked for 50p. I reached down to my door cards, pretended to get my wallet, said "Thanks but no thanks" and drove off.

Silly girl should understand English. "No" means NO!

Sin_Chase · 2 Jul 2009 at 14:43

This thread actually reminds me of being in South Africa. When you turn into a garage with a BMW you should see the flock of attendants all run and try second guess which bay your going into so they can wash and maybe get a tip.

I couldn't help but pretend to go into one then change my mind at the last minute... evil.... but oh my god fun.

Being rather ignorant to their wages the first time I filled up I tipped a guy, only to be told as I drove off the forecourt that it was probably a weeks wages I tipped him. No wonder he was so happy and over-thankfull