Ever declined a good job?

[Gimpymoo]

Been offered a good job but for numerous reasons I am going to decline but feel like such a fraud by saying no. Various personal reasons, none of them to do with the job. If it had came along 3 years ago, would have snatched their hands off but was not to be.

 

[Stu999]

If you don’t want it for whatever reason then turn it down. No need to feel bad about it.

 

[Gaijin]

Been offered a good job but for numerous reasons I am going to decline but feel like such a fraud by saying no. Various personal reasons, none of them to do with the job. If it had came along 3 years ago, would have snatched their hands off but was not to be.

It's a natural course of action particularly as you get older. Early on when you have no responsibilities such as a mortgage, kids, care of people or property, you have more flexibility to take risks, travel and spread your wings.

I'd argue it's not about turning the opportunity down, it's moreso how you do it and how you conduct yourself. For instance, applying and going through the process when you have little to no intention of seeing it through, is a lot different from getting increased exposure what the job role actually entails along the process and realising it's a bad fit.

 

[Trifid]

You can decline a job for any reason you want. I declined one because I thought the colleague I would be working with was very dull.

 

[philjayj]

Yes, a couple of times mainly due to imposter syndrome.

 

[HangTime]

I've never declined a good job per se but I have withdrawn from late in the application process for some good jobs. Although I suppose I had a situation where I was offered an internal job I applied for, but then when talking to the director of the division I was already in he created a new role, so I declined the one I applied for.

In your case, if there are "numerous" reasons then it sounds like the right call, rather than being a dilemma you need to weigh up the pros and cons for.

 

[Josh]

I was approached twice by the same company and ended up saying no both times, I just didn’t feel like it was the right move at that time.

Possibly some imposter syndrome in play, but I don’t regret the decision.

 

[throwaway4372]

Better to decline than leave after a short time - which looks bad on your cv and you'll have to explain it constantly.

 

[BUDFORCE]

I've turned down both internal and external before.

External one about 2 years ago, didn't offer enough money, there was a salary band and I said right off the bat I would not leave unless it was top whack, they offered me a bit under so I said no.

I've had a couple of internal as well I thought about then changed my mind.

 

[Gaijin]

Some interesting mentions of imposter syndrome, which I feel is natural to some extent. There is only so much the interview process can achieve, particularly if you don't have the stamina/time/inclination for some of the longer processes (I think Google used to have 7 interviews for some of the roles relevant to my field). You are also relying to an extent that the company is interviewing you properly to gauge your suitability, which can prevent you getting into a role you cannot perform, especially as you won't know every factor at the point you may accept the position

With imposter syndrome, I think the key questions to ask yourself are "Can I succeed in this role?" and if so, "What do I need in order to do so?", and with that in mind "How likely is it that I will succeed?".

Mind you, there are plenty of people who live off that - we've recently let a couple of evangelical blag artists go, one of which was literally waiting tables (not that there is anything wrong with that, but - relevancy) before joining us on a package well into 6 figures, and then clinging on with their fingernails before they were found out. They then update (and inflate) the CV and rinse and repeat.

 

[Terminal_Boy]

Yes, but only because I’d had a better offer from another company.

Zero guilt and no regrets.

 

[VRDoctor]

I've turned down more jobs than I've accepted - interviews go both ways.

 

[Raumarik]

Yes, I'm one of those annoying candidates who has "any questions for us?" at the end of interviews for a reason. I've been lucky in that I've never been desperate to move job, so I've been able to be picky.

Last one I declined as it was clear their idea of six months in another country was guess-work at best and it could have been far longer.

 

[HangTime]

Might be a good thread to list out some of the 'red flags' we've seen from otherwise 'good seeming' jobs. Things to probe on I guess to determine how good the fit is:

• Real lack of clarity about what one would be doing. There might be some special typically more senior roles that are more open-ended where the incumbent will shape their own agenda, but generally speaking I get worried if they can't articulate a clear vision for what they want me to do, how I'll be utilised etc
• Insufficient resources / size of team. I've interviewed for some "Head of" type roles in the past where during the interview I determined that they were basically looking for someone very hands-on with hardly any 'boots on the ground' to support them. There was one where I'd have 1 person in my team with some vague suggestion that this would grow slightly. Given what they wanted to achieve, I basically said, if I've understood your vision and operating model correctly, my opinion is you don't have the required resources allocated to deliver it and I'd need to spend all my time being hands-on, which still wouldn't be enough. Probably a good example of where I've matured around making interviews a two-way street rather than being scared of saying things they may not want to hear.
• Interviews that seem hard to schedule and/or interviewers seemingly rushed off their feet. Potentially indicative of being overworked/disorganised/not prioritising recruitment.
• Lack of clarity on interview process. Big turn off I had at one large gaming company, after 5 weeks and being interviewed by 8 people, they still couldn't give any certainty, vague statement about another interview in the next two weeks, which might not be guaranteed to be the final stage. Like seriously come on guys, over a month has passed since we first spoke and you STILL don't even know what own process is, never mind actually reaching a decision?!
• Can't articulate readily how success is measured, how they measure performance etc.

On the flipside, some 'green flags' (I guess, things you might want to consider when interviewing people to give them confidence in your org/role)

• Having materials on hand to present that illustrate things like current/target state (where I'll be starting from, where I'm expected to lead us to)
• For consultancy roles, any materials about the specific programmes/projects of work. I've seen both extremes here, one consultancy could give me a decent overview of a specific project they would be looking to place me on. Another, couldn't even say what end client it might be for never mind type of project what I'd be doing (which was a bit worrying for an outside IR35 contract, they were basically running a bodyshop at stage)
• Interview panelists have have a good rapport with each other.
• They seem interested in your views on how to approach real scenarios they are facing as much as your raw knowledge or getting you to regurgitate what you have done previously
• Controversial, but I like aptitude testing. Makes me think they are less likely to hire muppets (or at least the muppets they do hire are probably reasonably smart).

 

[Moley]

Yes, a couple of times in my career - for differing reasons.

First was family related - as I was considering the offer (which required moving) a close family member came down with Cancer and moving my family became not an option.
Secondly was down to the hirer misleading me - I interviewed for a Sales Engineering Role with a Cyber Consultancy only to find out when the contract came it was actually for their hardware/software sales division who I didn't want to work for.

 

[Lopéz]

Yes, I successfully interviewed for one of the largest independent Salesforce implementation partners in the UK a couple of years ago, and despite being clear about my location being outside the UK they conveniently ignored it at the offer stage and gave me a boilerplate London based contract.

I discussed it with their recruiter and she confirmed they were unable to change anything so I reluctantly declined. I really wanted to work for them so I was very disappointed at the time but I couldn't accept under those terms.

 

[[HB]Rugrat]

Yes - my last employer screwed me over during a restructure because they "just wanted to give some new blood a try". They got some new blood in while I languished in a dead-end role feeling sorry for myself. Their new blood was a catastrophe though and 12 months later they got rid and offered me a pay rise to take the job. That shook me out of the malaise I'd been in: I told them to stick it and left the organisation altogether to go self-employed. Whatever the reason, if it doesn't feel right don't do it - taking a job out of gratitude or purely for the money isn't a great reason for most of us.

 

[Participant]

I have just left a good job in a large Plc - good both in terms of prestige and package - because it didn't fit in with my family and lifestyle.

In the 4 months I was there, there were constant meetings at 8am, 5pm, and frequent complaints from higher ups that my team weren't in the office enough.

Moved to a smaller company where people are much more down to earth and it's 2 days in, plus the flexibility to drop and collect my kids whenever I want. I've only been there 3 weeks and I'm already much happier and more relaxed. More money too?!

I did explicitly ask about family-friendly policies at interview stage but I don't feel what they said reflected the reality during my time there. It's important for me to be there for my kids and the company had (what I feel is) a very old fashioned office-centric policy, something they're perfectly entitled to do of course, it just doesn't suit me.

 

[ChrisUK1983]

Had an offer on the table from an external company close to 15k salary uplift with what looked on paper as better working conditions. Been with them 24 years so thought it was time for a change of scenery.

Rejected it as the opportunity arose for my current employer to fund my masters degree. Time will tell whether it was the right move.

 

[celliott]

I'm in a similar dilemma at the moment. I've been in my current job 3 years and happy with what I do and the pay, but I'm being pressured into working towards a promotion (after already saying I wasn't interested). Sure there will be more pay but its also more responsibility, more stress and not sure I really want either of those.

On the other hand I'm going to be working at least another 30 years until I retire.. so maybe I should still be climbing the career ladder or I'll regret it later.. Imposter Syndrome is definitely a factor, I could do the job but would need to adopt the right mindset and put a lot of extra effort in to upskill etc. I would rather my free time to spend on things outside of work.