Joke

mehuk

mehuk

mehuk

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Joined
29 Sep 2006
Posts
2,954
A man was sitting on a blanket at the beach. He had no arms and no legs.
Three women were walking past and felt sorry for the poor man.

The first woman said "Have you ever had a hug?"
The man said "No," so she gave him a hug and walked on.

The second woman said "Have you ever had a kiss?"
The man said "No," so she gave him a kiss and walked on.

The third woman walked over to him and whispered in his ear "Have you ever been ****?"
The fellow looked up in amazement and said "No"

She said "You will be when the tide comes in".

No swearing

Gilly
 
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Lmao i like that, i love these kind of jokes... make me giggle.

Change the profanity, ive been suspended for that before.

James.
 
Royal Wedding Night

Camilla bought new shoes for her wedding, which got increasingly tighter around her feet as the day went on.

That night, when the festivities were finally over and they finally retired to their room, she flopped on the bed and said, "Charles darling, please remove my shoes, my feet are absolutely killing me!"

Her ever-obedient Prince of Wales worked on her right shoe with vigor, but it would not budge. "Harder!" yelled Camilla, "Harder!" Charles yelled back, "I'm trying, my darling! But it's just so blooming tight!"

"Come on, my prince! Give it all you've got!" she cried.

Finally, when the shoe released, Charles let out a loud groan and Camilla exclaimed, "Aaahh! Oh, God, that feels sooo good!"

In their bedroom next door, the Queen said to Prince Phillip, "See? I told you with a face like that, she would still be a virgin!"

Meanwhile, as Charles tried to remove her left shoe, he cried, "Oh, bloody hell, darling! This one's even tighter!"

To which Prince Phillip said to the Queen, "That's my boy: once a Navy man, always a Navy man!"
 
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