Some opinions on what you'd do.

cyborg said:
I just really don't want to make my girlfriend feel like crap by going. She'll be coming home from work and wanting to make me dinner for when i get back from work and instead i'd be pretty much telling her to stuff it.
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If you think of it like that you will be telling her to stuff it, simple as really.

Sit her down, explain to her that your friend NEEDS you to be there for her. I'm sure there are times in her life she has needed her friends. Say that you will make it up by taking her out to dinner tomorrow night at her favourite restaurant to say thanks for trusting you etc. :)

Then remember to book the bleedin' table so you don't look a muppet :p
 
If you lie to your girlfriend and she finds out it's almost certainly foing to end your relationship as she'll use the old you lied about it so you must be biffing her line. Tell her the truth she's going to have to get used to you seeing old 'friends' at some point and she needs to learn to trust you, unless she already has reason not to trust you if you have a rep for going behind peoples backs then I can see why she is paranoid. Where you with someone else when you and the current GF got together as this always causes these sort of tentions as they assume that if you did it once you'll do it again.
 
Shouldn't we really be calling her the ex girlfriend, I think the OP designed the question to get the reaction he wants.

How many of us would get away with going off to spend time with an ex?
 
Hello cyborg, you need to sit your girlfriend down and explain the situation to her. A relationship is pointless without communication. :)

Phate said:
Say that you will make it up by taking her out to dinner tomorrow night at her favourite restaurant to say thanks for trusting you etc. :)
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Hey Phate, I would personally disagree with your there. You shouldn't need to say thank you for trusting your partner in a relationship. The trust should already be there. :)
 
Fire Wizard said:
Hey Phate, I would personally disagree with your there. You shouldn't need to say thank you for trusting your partner in a relationship. The trust should already be there. :)
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I agree, but to me it sounds asif the trust isn't there.

Hence my suggestion, to show as a way of appreciation to try and start building the trust. :)
 
Fire Wizard said:
Hello cyborg, you need to sit your girlfriend down and explain the situation to her. A relationship is pointless without communication. :)

Hey Phate, I would personally disagree with your there. You shouldn't need to say thank you for trusting your partner in a relationship. The trust should already be there. :)
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Gotta agree with this personally - Without decent communication and trust, a relationship has nothing.

You shouldn't feel the need to reward your other half because they trust you. It's a necessity in a successful relationship. You wouldn't buy her dinner because she remembered to brush her teeth would you?

Imagine what would happen if you went on holiday somewhere without her, quite simply you probably wouldn't go simply because she'd be too worried that you'd cop-off with another girl.

There's two things here really, is she just really paranoid?
In which case you two need to sort it out together.

Or does she actual have good reason to suspect you might do something? Do you have a reputation for doing such things, and are you likely to do it?
In which case you need to sort yourself out first.
 
nikebee said:
You shouldn't feel the need to reward your other half because they trust you. It's a necessity in a successful relationship. You wouldn't buy her dinner because she remembered to brush her teeth would you?
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My point is that there doesn't appear to much/any trust - from the first impression I've had from cyborg. Start it off with going to see his friend tonight and then thanking the missus for trusting him and showing the appreciation by spoiling her, and build from there.
 
Ben M said:
There's nothing to make up for though really is there... He has a friend that needs him, she should see that and be able to trust him.
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I know she should be able to but this doesn't appear to be happening.
 
Explain to your GF that she's just your friend, and needs a friend right now.

She should trust that you won't do anything, if she can't trust you then your relationship is seriously lacking.

It seems pretty simple to me.
 
Phate said:
I know she should be able to but this doesn't appear to be happening.
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in which case i refer you to my original solution

Ben M said:
go see the friend and tell your gf

then enjoy your make-up sex after the inevitable arguement with your gf ;)
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but also, telling your gf beforehand will give her more reason to trust you, because you're being honest with her. i don't think that a restaurant meal is really wise though.
 
Phate said:
My point is that there doesn't appear to much/any trust - from the first impression I've had from cyborg. Start it off with going to see his friend tonight and then thanking the missus for trusting him and showing the appreciation by spoiling her, and build from there.
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Got to say I agree with you mate, trust can be very difficult particularly if she has been out with someone in the past who abused her trust or if the op has a rep for abusing it.

Taking her out for a nice meal or something is a nice way of saying thanks to her for doing something she wasn't entirely confortable with and it will she her how much you appreciate her which should help to build the trust going forward.
 
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