When to have children?

Now I'm nearly 34 I feel I've missed the boat. I've left it too long. Even though my wife wanted them from when we were 21 I kept putting her off with just about every trick in book.

If I could have my time again I would have them in my early 20's. Now i'm older I realise the things I thought mattered in life don't actually and I wasted my 20's being a selfish dick.
 
Had my daughter when I was 34 (shes 2 now), my gf is 11 years younger than me though. Never a perfect time to have kids.

We certainly didnt plan it but if you are with the right bird thats all that really counts.

And mid-30s is ideal for blokes I reckon.
 
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strudey said:
34 isn't too late!
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Not from a biological stand no, from a mindset I think it's far too late for me. My wife cleans the spot I was standing in after I move, if someone puts a 2mm mark on the walls I get the paint touch up kit out.

When we go round people's houses with kids and see the smashed up walls and skirting, doors etc I dont think we could bare it :D

Not from a materialistic view but I'm so used to our stuff lasting for ages and damage free :D

It that way I think we have left it too late.
 
I've wanted to have kids in my early 20's but I've not found a women who will hang around lol.

However at 32 an recently single after 4 years I'm just looking to have some fun :)
 
Had My first one at 23,second at 25 and my third and last (you listening woman?!?) at 34.We planned the third,the first two were 'pleasant suprises'.

Whilst it was enjoyable having kids young,we were sooo skint for ages.In some ways I wish we'd waited till we were secure financially.Plus I suppose me and the other half were fairly lucky in that we got on so well and stayed together,despite the stresses that having kids creates.
 
I had Jazmine at 23/24, I remember sitting down on the Sofa & discussing it with the missus & was Proud to tell her later that she was planned properly. Didn't stop me & her mother splitting up when she was nearly 7 though which was ****.
I would Never advise anyone to have kids as the risk of not seeing them growing up causes to much pain. Yes i had full access & Yes i have a Fantastic relationship with my Daughter but Nothing replaces the days/hours/minutes that you miss.
It took me more than two years to be able to drive away from a visit with my daughter without crying for half an hour. I've left pieces of my heart up & down the A14. For these reasons the only way i would have another child would be if i had custody if we split, pre arranged Before pregnancy. I'd even want to be a house husband rather than miss a Second of my child growing up.
The way i see it is if there was a women that would accept that then she plans on sticking around forever. If she wanted to go then fair enough but Nobody would separate me from another child of mine & i mean Nobody.
This whole subject is real close to my heart but i write this really for others to examine there partners Thoroughly Before having a child. There is a lot to think about, I hope i have at least given another angle/perspective to look at. I haven't meant to be negative & obviously wish you all the best :)
 
id like to think by 26 i would have a stable relationship (or any of that matter) so maybe add a few years 27/28.

freind of mine is 22 and having his first. seems to be the right age for some.
 
I was 34 when my son was born (he'll be 2 in three weeks). The reason we waited was that we wanted to ensure we where financially viable to give him the life we wanted to. We made sure we had the big house in a nice area with no debt and then embarked on lots of nights of productive fun.
 
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