Daddy's Dating Rules

Luw said:
Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a 'Barrier method' of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am that barrier, and I will kill you.
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my favorites out of the lot :D
 
amaru said:
Also that seen from Bad Boys 2 where Reggie takes out Martin Lawrences daughter. lol :D
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I thought that aswell :D

I have an agreement with my best mate to do a similar thing to our daughters when their older. They'll be single until they're 21.

Burnsy
 
My father once told me why he was so happy to have a son & not a daughter -

"with a son its only the one little "Richard" you have to deal with... with a daughter its all the thousands of others"


.... still to this day not entirely sure what to make of that :p
 
I wish I'd got hold of these rules back in 1993 & given them to my dad, with any luck my sister would never have married her now ex-husband (thank god!) ;)
 
Another reason why I don't want to have kids. Couldn't be doing with trying to police daughters and their dates! eek:
 
Luw said:
Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi . When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit the car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.
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Muahahahah. :D:D
 
Very important question to ask is always 'Do you have protection with you?'

If 'no' - 'You don't use protection? You clearly don't take your own health and safety, let alone anyone else's seriously'

If 'yes' - 'you're going on a date with MY daughter and you decide to take condoms with you!'
 
LOL hogan knows best for advise tbh.

Its very old but still awesome my girlfriend told me that her dad said to her "you don't need a boyfriend at uni to distract you". When she mentioned he was about 6ft5 I got slightly worried. Mind you the second time I visited it was to go to a party where her parents friends proceeded to inform me that if I hurt her, they will hurt me.

I live in fear :(

Aero
 
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