Let's Microwave Berlin: mock your PC repair customers in here.

how can someone see it as trogan :S its on logical that its trojan, as in trojan horse :( old people should go back to school.
 
Had a few classics years back when I worked at a competitor.

One woman's call I'll never forget. This was back in 56k modem days and she'd phoned up as she couldn't get on the internet. Her phoneline was most likely ok as she was calling in from it, modem passed diagnostics etc, guided her through reinstalling drivers etc etc. The company supplied a stupidly labelled "Internet Disc" which had modem drivers, website links and some tools etc etc.
I think the question that struck gold was when I asked her for the 5000th time to check AGAIN that the cable was plugged firmly into the modem and the telephone point.
Her: "Oh that one? no, I've not plugged that in - I don't want all these high phone bills".
Queue 20 second silence....
Me: "Umm but you'll need that otherwise you obviously won't be able to connect to the internet"
Her: "But I've got the internet here on CD and I've got an internet modem, why would I need to use my phone line too"

Took a while to explain.

We must've played back the call recording to just about everyone in the company at one point or another.


Another good'un was a guy that was REALLY angry that his new machine was 'eating' CDs, going mental down the phone. Was really not willing to co-operate so we had a courier return the machine.
When it got back to us, one of the guys from downstairs said that he could read discs etc fine, but when he opened the case he found a bunch of CDs loose in the bottom, one stuck between the CD drive and the fascia blanking plate below it.
 
I don't have IT problems, just dimensionally challenged people who cant understand that you cant simply enlarge (for example) a 4 inch by 4 inch photo to fit an 8 inch by 10 inch frame without loosing the sides of the damn thing, that, or stretching it vertically an extra 25% more than you do horizontally, and making it look like it was taken in the house of mirrors.

You have to explain this very slowly, about 3 times a week, and still about 1 in 3 of them cant grasp the concept without me just knocking up an example, where their response is usually "oh....well what can I do then?". I don't bloody know. Buy a SQUARE frame perhaps?!

Arrrghhh.....and people who want business stationery done, who then supply the "artwork" either as a hand drawn scrawl, or as a minuscule 50pixel by 100 pixel hideously compressed jpeg that they've found online somewhere. :mad::mad:
 
Just had a classic!!!

Left a message on a customers answer phone stating they needed a Windows repair on there computer.

Customer:
Hello, You have just left a message on my answer phone, I think you have got the wrong number you said something about me needing a "glass repair"

Reply :
I’m not too sure… we are the computer shop…..

Customer:
You must have had a wrong number, bye!
 
Brother in law : ive just got a new 2gb memory card for my phone

me : cool

him : how much memory has your computer got?

me : 1gb

him : BWAAAA HAAAA HAAAA my phones better than your computer


:D
 
peetee said:
how can someone see it as trogan :S its on logical that its trojan, as in trojan horse :( old people should go back to school.
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The document it came in would be the horse,the thing that does the damage would be one of the trogans inside.
 
1373521269_56df73ed33.jpg
 
Whats with Mariah Carey asking CompuNerd if 802.11n has now been installed as beforehand it was killing her download speed?!!
 
L33 said:
Had a few classics years back when I worked at a competitor.

One woman's call I'll never forget. This was back in 56k modem days and she'd phoned up as she couldn't get on the internet. Her phoneline was most likely ok as she was calling in from it, modem passed diagnostics etc, guided her through reinstalling drivers etc etc. The company supplied a stupidly labelled "Internet Disc" which had modem drivers, website links and some tools etc etc.
I think the question that struck gold was when I asked her for the 5000th time to check AGAIN that the cable was plugged firmly into the modem and the telephone point.
Her: "Oh that one? no, I've not plugged that in - I don't want all these high phone bills".
Queue 20 second silence....
Me: "Umm but you'll need that otherwise you obviously won't be able to connect to the internet"
Her: "But I've got the internet here on CD and I've got an internet modem, why would I need to use my phone line too"

Took a while to explain.
Click to expand...

Dear lord, how on earth did you make someone that dumb get the concept of the internet ? what did she say, when you somehow got it across to her how it all works ?
 
interruptible power supply
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Brilliant :D We're even getting this kind of stuff from posters.

Edit - Just remembered one funny event. A guy came into a computer shop I worked in about 6 years ago, asking for a PC Chips motherboard so he could upgrade his computer on the cheap. Sold it too him, asked if he wanted it fitted for an extra £15, he declined. So he went away to fit it, came back around 4 hours later asking for a refund, saying it didn't work. Turned out he'd put a screw-driver straight through the middle of the board whilst trying to fit it, a huge hole right near the southbridge and AGP slot, cracked PCB everywhere.
 
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the worst thing you can EVER do is help out a family friend with a technical problem, you automatically become their tech support for the rest of theirs (or your) life...

The worst i've ever had was my old mans mate in the pub, heard i "knew a bit about computers" and he had broken the cup holder on the front.... yeah igit was using the cd drive for his cups.

People need a license for computers like they do cars!
 
Have never had much happen when I'm fixing stuff for people but one time when the on board sound blew on my laptop I had to ring up dell to have it replaced. Naturally it was some answer service over in India someplace where all good call answer centers go.

I ran the tech guy through everything I had done and gave my prognosis that it was a borked sound card which needed to be replaced but I understand that these guys have a check sheet to run through first before they can have the laptop returned, anyways;

Basically the guy went through all the standard stuff, have you plugged it in, have you turned it on etc until it came to checking the drivers.

(This is not verbatim, just a general outline)

Tech: Right sir I'm going to need to get you to go to our support website and download the drivers.
Me: I've just installed them from the CD
Tech: What CD?
Me: The CD that came with my laptop labbeled Drivers.
Tech: This is not possible, you cannot have a Driver CD for this laptop.
Me: It quite clearly says Driver CD for Inspiron 5160 System.
Tech: Go to the website for the drivers, you have no CD.
Me: I'm holding the CD in my hand.
Tech: Download drivers from website.
Me: I have literally just installed the drivers before ringing you.
Tech: This is not possible, go to the website.
Me: Can I speak to someone else please.
Tech: Sir, can you please download the drivers from the website.
Me: I'd like to be put on to someone else.
Tech: The drivers are on the website.
Me: Okay, I'll do that and ring you back, thanks, you've been very helpful.
Tech: Before you go would you mind speaking to my supervisor about my performance.
Me: *Que evil grin* Yes, of course.

Needless to say I wasn't very happy with his performance.
 
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