I think she is cheating……

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Everytime i thought my wife was cheating she was... go with yer gut instinct its normally right .
No real need for keyloggers and stuff as once you get the feeling its normally not long before the truth comes out... Its crap but hey thats life .

Persil
 
Harsh thread and I guess no upfront discussion about it all has occurred yet then?

Just have words with her, and "I am Fine" is not the correct answer. Even if things in the evening are going well if you have doubts talk to her. Maybe go so far as to feel that she is withdrawn or something has changed.

You do not have to just accuse her of sleeping around, as never will get what you want from such a route.

So end it, or if you care about her talk about it!
 
This thread has been a great read while at working doing nothing thanks.
I think though we need an update to help you further
 
id like to see an update. i want to know how it goes, i feel so sorry for you. ive been in the same situation. it drove me mad, until one night all hell just broke loose, and i didnt give a s*** who i hurt (emotionally, as id never hit a bird) as i was hurt enough because it was so obvious and rubbed in my face, i just wanted the truth. so i demanded it. i had allsorts of her mates ringing me up threatening to kill me/knife me etc because i was the one in the wrong and got a bit angry. had to change phone number and such. and watch my back for weeks. nothing happened. moral of the story is, keep it calm and talk with her, if it turns out she is cheating, dont go out for the typical revenge sort of attitude. just say to her calmly, just pack your stuff an go, i dont want anything else to do with you.
 
You want an update ?

Well, spent the last couple of days together and everything has been fine :)
Nothing has happened to report.

I of course have been nosey and kept a mental record of text’s she has sent and they tally up fine for the last 48 hours as she has been with me.

Although he did ring her 3 days ago, a few minutes after I had left home, but since then nothing, yes I am nosey and have kept a tally on her text counter.

She is back at work now and of course he is with her. I don’t know what is going on, I am just trusting her for the time being as she has been nice over the past few days. I have given her the opportunity to tell me anything she wishes to.
She has promised everything is fine and that she is not planning on going anywhere. Loves living with me and it totally looking forward to our holiday.

So, I don’t know.

Her most recent “send to” window on her phone does not have him on it for the last 3 days. Who knows, I’ll see later today wont I.

What a situation to be in, I think the world of her and she says exactly the same to me. I could be all wrong on this. Maybe ill get another picture when her mobile phone bill arrives. As then I will see just how many text’s have been sent and calls. But then what... I mean, I have said my peace to her, said how i feel (not mentioned I know anything about anyone else or texts/calls etc) nothing to suggest I have been snooping.

But what if
A) it HAS all stopped now ?
and
B) when her bill arrives there is for eg, lots of texts/calls to him up untill todays date? How do I deal with that. I feel sometimes that if we make it to the holiday then we have it and then when we get back I just tell her everything and take it from there.


As there is nothing on her present bills as I have already looked for his number.
 
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Just don't do anything rash mate.

I made that mistake, acted on emotion, accused of this and that, only to be proven wrong, and messing up our relationship.

You have to ask if she is worth taking that risk.
 
Theres nothing better than going on holiday, when theres something in the back of your mind. :rolleyes:

Being with them for 24 hours a day, good luck with that.
 
Man the **** up and stop being such a wet lettuce! Especially stop reading her texts, checking her phone whenever you can, constantly checking up on her. You'll only push her away in the end then it will only be your own fault. Then what
 
Checking up is not cool i must say if you cant trust her without having to hunt thro her phone and txt's well theres not much a relationship is there.

To those saying man up blah blah blah nothing wrong with being emotional once in a while. But i do agree that you need to think if this girl is worth the hassle :confused:
I mean are you going to go the rest of the relationship/life constantly checking her phone ??? if you are good luck......:o
 
-Tauren- said:
id like to see an update. i want to know how it goes, i feel so sorry for you. ive been in the same situation. it drove me mad, until one night all hell just broke loose, and i didnt give a s*** who i hurt (emotionally, as id never hit a bird) as i was hurt enough because it was so obvious and rubbed in my face, i just wanted the truth. so i demanded it. i had allsorts of her mates ringing me up threatening to kill me/knife me etc because i was the one in the wrong and got a bit angry.
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Her mates threatened to stab you because you shouted at her? :eek:

Magic_x_uk said:
Although he did ring her 3 days ago, a few minutes after I had left home, but since then nothing, yes I am nosey and have kept a tally on her text counter.

[...]

Her most recent “send to” window on her phone does not have him on it for the last 3 days. Who knows, I’ll see later today wont I.

What a situation to be in, I think the world of her and she says exactly the same to me. I could be all wrong on this. Maybe ill get another picture when her mobile phone bill arrives. As then I will see just how many text’s have been sent and calls.
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I wouldn't bother checking on her phone. If she wants to hide it she will. My married woman's husband checks her phone all the time, she manages to hide contact with me pretty well.

In the end all it'll do is make you paranoid and angry with her and push her into the other guys arms if she finds out that you're doing it. Texts and phone call logs can all be deleted, or if she wants to contact him that much, she might even have another phone.

Trust her until you have proper reason not to or you'll lose her.
 
TBH its either your own instincts or possibly low self esteem etc that makes you think she is cheating on you, and in reality its no way of having a serious relationship if your partner thinks you are cheating on them, so fairly doomed from failure I think.
 
I don't see how you can possibly justify spying on your girlfriend. If you don't trust her, speak to her about it or dump her. Stop being such a coward.

Checking her phone bills? And her phone and messages? Jesus Christ.
 
So you had a word with her about stuff and lo and behold she stops getting texts from the man. You say he works with her, you didn't say that upto now. How do you know this, do you know the bloke? I'm sure I've seen tv dramas where some woman is cheating on her husband but when they come home they give their partner a good rodgering, this is to remove their own feelings of guilt. Sounds to me like she is having a bit on the side for the thrill but wants the safety of a relationship with you.
 
Murf said:
Checking her phone bills? And her phone and messages? Jesus Christ.
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I fully agree. I am bad I know it. This is not the way to behave. BUT if everything was ok I wouldnt be like this would I. I only know this because I checked up and this is what I found.

I 100% hope I am fully wrong and can put this behind me. This is not who I am normally I can assure you all of that.

But when you put a lot into something and have yourselve been 100% honest always, I really want the same in return. I'm a nice guy. i'd do anything for anyone. I just want to be proven wrong on all this I guess.
 
Magic_x_uk said:
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Stop being such a pathetic spy, you clearly don't think "the world of her" if you don't even trust her and disrespect her by snooping on her private things. I don't even look at the caller display when handing my gf her ringing phone.

I've never been this frank on an online forum but you really are a bit of a loser.
 
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