I think she is cheating……

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Magic_x_uk said:
I fully agree. I am bad I know it. This is not the way to behave. BUT if everything was ok I wouldnt be like this would I. I only know this because I checked up and this is what I found.

I 100% hope I am fully wrong and can put this behind me. This is not who I am normally I can assure you all of that.

But when you put a lot into something and have yourselve been 100% honest always, I really want the same in return. I'm a nice guy. i'd do anything for anyone. I just want to be proven wrong on all this I guess.
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There's no way of justifying what you are doing. You can't justify it. Stop spying.
 
So,,,,yesterday when we got in. She had the conversation of "I dont see you enough" (because of my job) How can it work if i never see you etc.

We chatted for a while and she was "whats the point", "we never see each other" etc. At the end of the night, it was still " I love you " etc and we went to bed and things were normal ish this morning before we go to work.

Very odd. I dont feel I know this girl no more.
 
Magic_x_uk said:
So,,,,yesterday when we got in. She had the conversation of "I dont see you enough" (because of my job) How can it work if i never see you etc.

We chatted for a while and she was "whats the point", "we never see each other" etc. At the end of the night, it was still " I love you " etc and we went to bed and things were normal ish this morning before we go to work.

Very odd. I dont feel I know this girl no more.
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Mate it's over... she gave you the biggest opening you could ever get to really blow this thing wide open and you fluffed it by skirting around the issue... which probably infuriated her completely, and made her lose further respect for you and your relationship. I get the impression you're the type that pleads and wheedles... and trust me that's not a sexy thing to women. They want decisiveness, they want action, they want confidence and they want passion... where have you shown these things? Do you not realise while she may not yet have cheated, she may well be coming into contact with other men that have these qualities and comparing you directly?

I have to say this and apologies if it sounds harsh, but you come accross as a bit spineless. Threads like this which drag on and on without the OP helping themselves annoy me... the sympathy well runs dry after a while.
 
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Magic_x_uk said:
We chatted for a while and she was "whats the point", "we never see each other" etc. At the end of the night, it was still " I love you " etc and we went to bed and things were normal ish this morning before we go to work.
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I've been silently following this thread because like the OP I would have possibly gone through the same motions as you have. It isn't right I agree but everyone does differ in how they react to feelings that their partner is cheating.

See, one of my past relationships with who I thought was the perfect girl ended up with "We never see each other" being ushered. In my eyes that is her trying to get carefully suggest that things aren't going right and maybe we should think things over. - Because that is what my ex ex ex ex had in mind. She kept making 'silent' suggestions to me, and I saw right through them but I didn't want to believe myself and that really hurt me hard. In the end she had been getting on well with a colleague at work, she saw him on a daily basis and I shan't say anymore. They didn't last long though and he used her...

I kinda know what you're going through OP so just give it time for now and see how things progress. Try not to let it eat you up.
 
Seen this kind of thread often throughout various forums and it's always by the same kind of person and it always ends in the same way. No offence but grow some and end it, it's obvious she wants to. Stop feeling sorry for yourself by looking for sympathy from us and sort yourself out.

I remember some years back on a forum some fella was pouring his heart out to some girl who cheated and walked all over him on more than one occasion. The guy just kept pleading with her to restart their 'relationship' against all advice and eventually people stopped caring. Again, no offence, but guys like that make me want to perform wanton acts of violence.
 
I've been silently reading this one too and keeping up with the goings on. This is a tough one Magic but if it were me, and I were sure of things I have to say I'd go for the 'blow it open' as soon as I could. There's no way I'd let someone walk over me like that without letting them know about it. You take control and you'll feel better I'm sure.
At the end of the day though, we're not in the situation and it's your life so you have to do what you think is best.
 
Ouch.

Its over mate.

Break up with her immediately.

If she confesses to cheating, tell her you knew about it and have been using her for s3x until you found something better.
 
Crimefighter said:
Ouch.

Its over mate.

Break up with her immediately.

If she confesses to cheating, tell her you knew about it and have been using her for s3x until you found something better.
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Damn...that's good haha...it's actually making me angry reading about all this to be honest so God knows how you must feel. You have to get the upper hand here or she's won! :D
 
sist_si said:
it's actually making me angry reading about all this to be honest so God knows how you must feel.
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lol I was about to post the same. I'm angered by the fact that the OP is going through so much mental pain, and she isn't...
 
Magic_x_uk said:
So,,,,yesterday when we got in. She had the conversation of "I dont see you enough" (because of my job) How can it work if i never see you etc.

We chatted for a while and she was "whats the point", "we never see each other" etc. At the end of the night, it was still " I love you " etc and we went to bed and things were normal ish this morning before we go to work.

Very odd. I dont feel I know this girl no more.
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I'm sorry but it does sound like its over. First time i had a relationship break up i clung on and got very hurt. The second time round i made the first move and ended it, i felt much better being in control and it also made her feel like rubbish (which she totally deserved). Don't cling on and hurt yourself.
 
Actually I have just spoken to my best friend about things and feel better.
I feel okay actually (at the moment), so what if we don’t have the holiday, not life ending is it.
It’s a family member’s apartment so they would understand.

I’m tempted to just pack all her stuff right now, stick everything in bin bags the whole lot. But I'm not a nasty guy like that. I don’t think it is who wins in this, were adults.
I just don’t like being under the idea that I may be being used.

I have no idea what is going on at her work, there is a massive party this weekend for her work that I am not going to. But of course he will be there, maybe there is nothing there, maybe 11 texts’ she sent yesterday and then deleted and are unaccounted for mean nothing.

Maybe I am soft, I don’t think I am, maybe at some times in your life you reach out for other people’s opinions.

Maybe it is hard to take the next step. I was so close last night to brining it all out in the open, ending it. Telling her Yes I have been through your phone as I have concerns over our relationship, and it appears rightly so with the text’s and call’s received from him and then hidden. I’m 36, I’m not stupid, I hold down a good job.

But when I have let her into my home, I expect honesty and to be truthful to me. Not to be contacting some other guy whilst she is in my home when I’m at work.

Especially when over the last few days I have given her the option to tell me anything, anything she needs to tell me. She isn’t stupid, she has a brain and a good job, I consider her mature in most things.

Maybe I am now coming to my senses. I guess I just want my holiday. You need them don’t you! I think I certainly will.
 
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