What part of 'unappreciative' and 'abusive' did you not understand?
Lending money - what would you do?
- Thread starter doublehelix2
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What part of 'unappreciative' and 'abusive' did you not understand?
I wouldn't like to owe nasty people money, thats for sure... which is what the situation sounds like to me.
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they die from starvation not lack of money. what do you think babies are born with cash in their mouth? people have things provided for, if people dont have a job in the uk, theres jsa etc etc etc.
people are basing their problems solely on how much money they have instead of doing something about it and getting themselves in trouble. The only way I can see someones health being imminently being damaged is if he gambled and lost to the wrong person.
Unfortunately people live on a planet where hundreds of years have dictated a structure whereby we can no longer easily sustain ourselves. It is a capitalised, globalised world, and even Africa is tied into it -- don't believe me? Read up on the Washington Consensus and neo-liberalism. Strangely enough, the UK is one of the few lucky countries where its citizens don't fall too badly, if they fall at all.
Also stop your quips about financial worth. I know exactly what it means to have nothing.
We work for credit. Our labour is what creates our goods and services. The credit is in turn used to purchase said goods and services. This is how the world works.
You're missing the point entirely about lending money to your family.
Money is not the meaning of life, nor is it the way to find happiness. It is simply a means to an ends. On your death bed, the only thing that will matter to you will be the life you've led, how happy you are with yourself as a person (be that through actions or whatever), your friends and most importantly; your family.
Also stop your quips about financial worth. I know exactly what it means to have nothing.
We work for credit. Our labour is what creates our goods and services. The credit is in turn used to purchase said goods and services. This is how the world works.
You're missing the point entirely about lending money to your family.
Money is not the meaning of life, nor is it the way to find happiness. It is simply a means to an ends. On your death bed, the only thing that will matter to you will be the life you've led, how happy you are with yourself as a person (be that through actions or whatever), your friends and most importantly; your family.
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Do you not think that money can buy food? Direct or indirect the result is exactly the same. Operations and drugs to treat illnesses cost money so that is two reasons why money can save lives.
If I had the money then I'd give it to the family member - I'd call it a gift and while I think that my family would pay me back it is better not to expect it. I'd much prefer to lose some cash I had spare than a family member.
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Im sorry in the uk which is the ops location, we have the nhs and jsa to get money and health care should they land in a rut. so no I dont think this is the case.
you should always look at alternative methods before you get involved i.e can the payment for what ever the problem is be spread over time, can his bank provide him with an emergency overdraft, can he get a credit card, can other members of the family contribute also.
why do you solely have to fork out for his issue?
I think this thread is definately missing too much detail to compliment. if it was a relative with a gambling problem - I would prob bail them out once depending on the amount. Im not made of money.
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Sometimes the best, but hardest thing to do is nothing.
All circumstances where money is involved are complicated. Are you feeding the problem and throwing good money after bad, or are you giving someone the chance to escape from a bad mistake they'll probably never make again? Messy stuff. I've helped friends & family out several times in my life. Ultimately it was a waste of a very significant chunk of my hard-earned savings, as it seems to have taught all those involved nothing.
Some people are just rubbish with money, but it's still hard to generalise. Only you know your circumstances, and all the advice here is ultimately worthless... even this.
Andrew McP
PS I'd disagree slightly with Nix. My hope is to have built up enough savings by the time I die to fund a student grant for science research at a university. Life is indeed for living, but money is also security while we're alive, and -- used wisely -- can be genuinely useful once we're no longer around to fritter it away on new graphics cards.
All circumstances where money is involved are complicated. Are you feeding the problem and throwing good money after bad, or are you giving someone the chance to escape from a bad mistake they'll probably never make again? Messy stuff. I've helped friends & family out several times in my life. Ultimately it was a waste of a very significant chunk of my hard-earned savings, as it seems to have taught all those involved nothing.
Some people are just rubbish with money, but it's still hard to generalise. Only you know your circumstances, and all the advice here is ultimately worthless... even this.
Andrew McP
PS I'd disagree slightly with Nix. My hope is to have built up enough savings by the time I die to fund a student grant for science research at a university. Life is indeed for living, but money is also security while we're alive, and -- used wisely -- can be genuinely useful once we're no longer around to fritter it away on new graphics cards.
like others have said, it depends on the person. Sure it's family but there's a few uncles in my family that I wouldn't pee on if they were on fire and there's others that I'd cut my arm off for.
To be honest, if it's proper family then I'd do it and I probably wouldn't even ask for it back. I mean, what the hell, it's just money...if you're lucky enough to be in a position to help someone, then I say help them.
I put a friend through school when she couldn't barely afford to buy groceries, and I still won't accept a penny back. it's just cash man. Helping people is what it's all about.
To be honest, if it's proper family then I'd do it and I probably wouldn't even ask for it back. I mean, what the hell, it's just money...if you're lucky enough to be in a position to help someone, then I say help them.
I put a friend through school when she couldn't barely afford to buy groceries, and I still won't accept a penny back. it's just cash man. Helping people is what it's all about.
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You said you'd never heard of anyone dying from a lack of money, people have done and will continue to do so. I'm aware of the NHS, our benefits system and some of the various positive and negative points that they have - some drugs will not be paid for by the NHS as they are too expensive so I'd have to say that it could be the case, even in this country.
I don't know what the situation is here and to be frank it makes little difference so I'm not going to enquire - I'm simply saying as a general principle for me I'd prefer to have my family around than have the cash, obviously it will depend on individual circumstances but money is easier to replace than people are.
I'd help the family member as long as they could be trusted to repay.
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Im speaking of the UK, this thread has nothing to do with a global scale where rules change entirely. and what the nhs wouldnt pay for I most certainly wouldnt be able to afford so those situations dont count neither.
The only people I'd ever lend money to are my gf, brothers, parents or gran, these people come before savings.
If I did lend them money I'd write it off, if they can pay me back in the future that's cool but I don't request or expect it, expecting it back and not getting it would only cause problems.
Anyone else can go whistle.
If I did lend them money I'd write it off, if they can pay me back in the future that's cool but I don't request or expect it, expecting it back and not getting it would only cause problems.
Anyone else can go whistle.
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Don't be such a doormat then! And contrary to what you've just said, it seems you do lend a lot more money than most.
