So upstairs were stealing my cable...

mrk · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:42

Poo in a bag and leave it outside their door.

gillywibble · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:51

Hide their bath sponge.

Sinny · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:51

mrk said:
Poo in a bag and leave it outside their door.

You forgot to add light it on fire

In all seriousness if it comes to the point where you can catch them red handed (router settings and get their MAC addresse) then getthe evidence and phone the police. Only do this if they are not very nice neighbour's though, if you get on well with them just say that it's illegal and you have a limit that your provider has set which will disconnect you if you go over the limit.

Van Hellseek · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:53

Hire a professional hitman.

Monkey Puzzle · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:55

Release honey badgers between the walls. Won't work if you have cavity wall insulation though.

rscosworth · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:55

nuke from space

iamdjdz · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:56

Poo in their beds. Whiles they're there. After a dodgey curry.

Cosimo · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:57

Cut their cables.

Von Smallhausen · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:57

Rickroll them.

Steve2000 · 13 Oct 2008 at 18:59

Round here the usual solution is to actually wait for them to come out, walk up to them and shout "EY! Who the **** do you think you are? Stealing my internet you thieving *******!". If he answers back in any way other than an apology then just smash the ****.

wez130 · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:00

build a brick wall outside their front door, cement and all.

Pilky01 · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:05

Install a small camera in the bedroom/bathroom and record. Post links for proof.

Also slip a note under there door with a link.

LoSt · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:06

remove one of there floors (ie your ceiling) and lace your floor with spikes/glass/aids and when they walk in they fall down to there doom

[FnG]magnolia · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:12

Burn their faces off using lasers and mirrors.

Buffman · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:15

Steve2000 said:
Round here the usual solution is to actually wait for them to come out, walk up to them and shout "EY! Who the **** do you think you are? Stealing my internet you thieving *******!". If he answers back in any way other than an apology then just smash the ****.

Make sure you have your biggest keyboard on you at the time

craptakular · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:26

Just phone police and say you saw Maddie McCann living in there flat.

His life will be ruined by the media

FrostedNipple · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:35

Put a grenade through the letterbox.

awaybreaktoday · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:36

Rub dogs poo over their door.

Clipsey · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:39

Ram some dead fish behind their radiators and in the heating cupboard

bigmouse64 · 13 Oct 2008 at 19:39

Some of these replies are classic.