Family dilemma

tisonlyme

tisonlyme

tisonlyme

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Hi guys,

I'm just after a bit of advice as to how to handle a family situation. My brother is married to a woman who already had 4 children, ranging in age now from 12 to 17 years old. They've been married now for 2 years but I still can't think of these kids as my family - they are just the kids of my sister in law. I don't see my brother much at all, as we live pretty far apart, but every year I am expected to cough up cash and buy Christmas presents for each of the kids.
Now, I'm no scrooge, I love getting presents for people, but I hardly know these kids, they aren't blood relations (in fact they each have a different father) and every single year all I get is a pack of novelty stripey socks, so I told my mum I'm not too keen on getting them anything, but at the same time I don't want to upset the family.

So now I'm not sure what to do...what do you all think?? :confused:
 
Would be mean not to get them anything but i think they would probably not see you as part of the family if you dont feel they're a part of the family.

I would suggest getting them something they can all use.
 
If you don't know them, don't get them anything.

Edit: if you really want to buy something, just get a box of cheap chocolates for the whole family.
 
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Tell your brother up front - tell him what you have just told a lot of strangers OR tell him/his mrs that you are strapped for cash or something this year so you can't buy everyone something so please don't buy you anything.

I was skint for a couple of years and did that to family and didnt make any difference to anyone. We still got together for dinner and had fun.

Its not all the giving and receiving lark :)
 
Perhaps organise a day trip with them, or do something fun with them, presents don't have to be a physical item.

Try to be the Uncle Tyson that you wish you had. It will allow you to get to know them better.
 
Why would you buy .... anything .... for someone you hardly ever see, have no affinity with etc? ...... just to keep up appearances?

Either develope a relationship and become friends/blood relatives (sort of) or spend your hard earned where you Know you will make a difference.
 
Blackbadger said:
Perhaps organise a day trip with them, or do something fun with them, presents don't have to be a physical item.

Try to be the Uncle Tyson that you wish you had. It will allow you to get to know them better.
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Thats the problem though, this is going to sound horrible but I really don't want to get to know them - they're not very nice kids, both my parents and my grandparents have said it, they are rude, uncontrollable and the eldest doesn't even live with them anymore!
 
17 yrs old is hardly a kid anymore so thats 1 person less to buy for

either get them token gifts or nothing at all, if your brother doesn't like it then tough , he should be more understanding
 
I kinda have the same situation as the OP now.

Parents split up not long ago, so now my dad has a new misses, and my mum has a new mister...I live with my mum, however the new mister my mother is with has a daughter, so I suddenly might have to buy presents for her.

Along with this, I'm probably expected to buy presents for my dad's new missus...although I didn't last year, for personal reasons.

It's all a big palarva! :p

Just get a big quality street tin or something, you can't be expected to buy presents for every person every year anyway.
 
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