Bit of help...this saturday.

Neoni

Neoni

Neoni

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me and the lady, are really not working out how we would like major arguments etc been going downhill for a while and i finally said something so were a bit iffy, i didnt think itd last this week, but it kinda has, does anyone see a problem with a takeaway in and a few dvds for valentines day? its so last minute, but opnions needed.

-Alex
 
Neoni said:
me and the lady, are really not working out how we would like major arguments etc been going downhill for a while and i finally said something so were a bit iffy, i didnt think itd last this week, but it kinda has, does anyone see a problem with a takeaway in and a few dvds for valentines day? its so last minute, but opnions needed.

-Alex
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That's pretty much what we're doing :) We're cooking a meal together though.

Too much pressure is put on V-day. It's only another day of the year!
 
craig_kennedy83 said:
I dont see a problem with it... and id love to do something similar with a lady friend if i had one :)

Depends on the girl tho... do you think she would like it?
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think she'd be grateful to spend time with me yeah, not sure whats going on in my head though at the moment, been down lately, but i do love her still
 
Neoni said:
think she'd be grateful to spend time with me yeah, not sure whats going on in my head though at the moment, been down lately, but i do love her still
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Trying not to turn this thread into a relationship thread but this happened with me and my bf recently. Sometimes you just need a bit of space, especially if you live and spend every night together. You could talk about it and maybe stay at a friends for a day just to get away for a while?

If it's awkward it best to get things sort ASAP :)
 
_dogma_ said:
Trying not to turn this thread into a relationship thread but this happened with me and my bf recently. Sometimes you just need a bit of space, especially if you live and spend every night together. You could talk about it and maybe stay at a friends for a day just to get away for a while?

If it's awkward it best to get things sort ASAP :)
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I don't live with her, we dont see eachother as much as we used to due to university, and her working, me always out with the band etc. so ive told her we'll have to see how things go, but i need my own space too, dont know if i did the right thing, but i promised id spend saturday with her, even if its just for the evening and not the night.... right thing to do?
 
If you really care about her and you can see that you've got stuck in a bit of a rut, book yourself a table somewhere nice and/or do something fun during the day. You probably need to inject some spark and if you want things to last then a bit of effort and surprise will show that she means something to you and that you're both just being stupid. You can tell her over dinner that what you said was a ridiculous mistake and tell her what she means to you, even with a letter, poem, anything. However, if you really can't see you lasting, then there's not much point and treat it as just another night in/out. It's your call, either grow a pair and sort **** out asap with some imagination and sensitivity, or leave things as they are and it'll fizzle out in no time at all. Best of luck if you go for the former.
 
Neoni said:
I don't live with her, we dont see eachother as much as we used to due to university, and her working, me always out with the band etc. so ive told her we'll have to see how things go, but i need my own space too, dont know if i did the right thing, but i promised id spend saturday with her, even if its just for the evening and not the night.... right thing to do?
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Only if you're wanting to spend the evening with her because you love her and not because it's Valentine's Day and you just think you should. Maybe it's the other extreme were you're just needing a couple of nights to reconnect if you're not seeing each other as often as before.

Poster above has some good points but there is no need to actually go to a restaurant and talk. It will just be as special if you are at home.
 
Bunka said:
If you really care about her and you can see that you've got stuck in a bit of a rut, book yourself a table somewhere nice and/or do something fun during the day. You probably need to inject some spark and if you want things to last then a bit of effort and surprise will show that she means something to you and that you're both just being stupid. You can tell her over dinner that what you said was a ridiculous mistake and tell her what she means to you, even with a letter, poem, anything. However, if you really can't see you lasting, then there's not much point and treat it as just another night in/out. It's your call, either grow a pair and sort **** out asap with some imagination and sensitivity, or leave things as they are and it'll fizzle out in no time at all. Best of luck if you go for the former.
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its not as easy as that honestly, its difficult to explain....
 
Neoni said:
its not as easy as that honestly, its difficult to explain....
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Ideally u need to forget all the bull****. Why's it so hard.. Small insight might gain u better advice ;) you just need to tell her how it is. Do you want to be with her or not?
 
Bunka said:
Ideally u need to forget all the bull****. Why's it so hard.. Small insight might gain u better advice ;) you just need to tell her how it is. Do you want to be with her or not?
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Dude, if you have experienced this relationship maybe you could see for yourself how it is, i love her to bits, i have affection for her, ive been with this girl for two years, but this last year has been a downhill slope, its been constant arguing and upset, we do work things out but its so difficult, it makes me down a lot im a very happy outgoing, larger than life person but she gets down and miserable at the tiniest things, i cant explain how hard it is.
 
Sounds like you need some new flare in the relationship, I'd say go for the "surprise romance" route.

However, you need to think (I hope you know her well enough to be able to figure this out) - will she react to it as a pleasant surprise, or feel uncomfortable or awkward given that things have been downhill?

If it's likely the latter, it might be worth skipping the surprise, and tell her "I was thinking about doing this, what do you think?" and ask her for suggestions.
 
thesubstitute said:
Sounds like you need some new flare in the relationship, I'd say go for the "surprise romance" route.

However, you need to think (I hope you know her well enough to be able to figure this out) - will she react to it as a pleasant surprise, or feel uncomfortable or awkward given that things have been downhill?

If it's likely the latter, it might be worth skipping the surprise, and tell her "I was thinking about doing this, what do you think?" and ask her for suggestions.
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I asked her, just now on the phone i suggested it and she said "Yeah, I'd Like that"
 
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