er... why the dig at Scottish people just because the OP is from Scotland...?
He's from Fife which frankly is a part nobody else in Scotland wants to claim. They can keep their own kind in their "kingdom"
Wednesdays Joke?
- Thread starter Sonea Fifer
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He's from Fife which frankly is a part nobody else in Scotland wants to claim. They can keep their own kind in their "kingdom"
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Permabanned
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He's from Fife which frankly is a part nobody else in Scotland wants to claim. They can keep their own kind in their "kingdom"
but they do make pretty good Banana's don't they?
Banananananananana
An oldie:
There is this guy who lost an eye in a fight. He looks like a freak without it and goes to a doctor who recommends a glass replacement. The guy cannot afford one so the doctor fits one made one out of wood which is cheaper. However, he becomes really self conscious about it and becomes a bit of a recluse. One day a friend gets him out to a bar. He sees everyone dancing and wants to join in.
He sees a chick with a hunchback standing around and thinks "Well, no one else is asking her to dance and she is worse off than me so I'll ask."
He goes up to her and says, "Want to dance?"
She looks really excited and says, "Would I!?"
The guy says "Wood eye? Wood eye? Well, screw you, hunchback!"
There is this guy who lost an eye in a fight. He looks like a freak without it and goes to a doctor who recommends a glass replacement. The guy cannot afford one so the doctor fits one made one out of wood which is cheaper. However, he becomes really self conscious about it and becomes a bit of a recluse. One day a friend gets him out to a bar. He sees everyone dancing and wants to join in.
He sees a chick with a hunchback standing around and thinks "Well, no one else is asking her to dance and she is worse off than me so I'll ask."
He goes up to her and says, "Want to dance?"
She looks really excited and says, "Would I!?"
The guy says "Wood eye? Wood eye? Well, screw you, hunchback!"
doublefacepalm.jpg.
what goes black-white-black-white-black-white-black-white-black-white-black-white-black-white
Penguin rolling down a hill!
A teacher asks her class, 'If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot
one of them, how many will be left?' She calls on little MARK.
He replies, 'None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot.'
The teacher replies, 'The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.'
Then little MARK says, 'I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?'
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, 'Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled
down the top and sucked the cone.'
To which Little MARK replied, 'The correct answer is 'the one with the Wedding
ring on,' but I like your thinking.'
one of them, how many will be left?' She calls on little MARK.
He replies, 'None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot.'
The teacher replies, 'The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.'
Then little MARK says, 'I have a question for YOU.
There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:
One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.
The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.
The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.
Which one is married?'
The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, 'Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled
down the top and sucked the cone.'
To which Little MARK replied, 'The correct answer is 'the one with the Wedding
ring on,' but I like your thinking.'