Do people like this change???

Soldato
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Basically I was seeing a girl who I kinda knew had feelings for her ex still, and still cared about him a lot.

He was an utter idiot with her, treated her VERY badly, beat her about a few times etc, major mind games and whatnot. He had her wrapped around his finger and it took her a LONG time to leave him the first time because she thought the sun shone out of his ass!

Now my ex has broken up with me through one reason or another, and has gone running back to him, she claims he's changed and she's in love with him, she knows him inside out blah blah etc. Even her mates can't understand what she's doing going back to him, and some have even said to her don't go to them if he messes up.

But what I want to know, is do people like that REALLY change? I'm the kind of person to believe if he's done it once, he will do it again, it's only a matter of time. And he is that type of person, he's just a little idiot who thinks he's something he really isn't! But she loves him for reasons I can't see!

Just curious to know what your thoughts about it are. Whilst I do still care about her (even though I really shouldn't and i'm purposely not speaking to her atm), part of me would go MAD if he did it to her again, but part of me just thinks you've been warned, its your funeral, dont come running to me.
 
She'll have to learn that lesson.

Have a word with her friends, and see what the situation is. You may find they're in the same boat but at least they know you're concerned.
 
He won't change, it will be back to mind games and beatings soon, and she won't change she will always keep getting sucked in. You're best off out of it imo
 
It I was in that position I would think **** her, let her make the same mistake twice, some people learn some don't.

If she didn't learn the first time there is no hope of you convincing her otherwise now
 
You're trying to understand feelings, no one ever said they had to be logical. In fact proceeding on the premise that they are not is probably a much sounder basis.

I'd suggest you don't try to dissuade the lady any further as she is both unlikely to listen and even less likely to thank you for it but if you feel you must then I refer you to Henry Ward Beecher who said "The true secret of giving advice is, after you have honestly given it, to be perfectly indifferent whether it is taken or not, and never persist in trying to set people right.".
 
I like the saying "Omnia mutantur, nihil interit - Everything changes, nothing perishes".
I think when it comes to this sort of thing he may have changed on the surface but will still be a complete tool at the core and it will show eventually
 
He's a ***** and girls, unfortunately, like them. Nice guys are secure, but boring and there's no work to be done on them. To a woman a guy is like a project.

It's like the difference for a guy between buying a 1950s mini that's in need of a little restoration, or a new fiat punto. The mini is just always going to be more appealing.

Be more of a ***** and she'll most probably come running back.
 
He's a ***** and girls, unfortunately, like them. Nice guys are secure, but boring and there's no work to be done on them. To a woman a guy is like a project.

It's like the difference for a guy between buying a 1950s mini that's in need of a little restoration, or a new fiat punto. The mini is just always going to be more appealing.

Be more of a ***** and she'll most probably come running back.

I'm going to smack my missus when she comes home tonight see if your right.
 
lol!

Yeh I know, i'm just trying to cut all ties with her but she owes me a fair whack which I need back right now so I can't just move on with my life if this is still looming!!!!!

She's an idiot and a waste of time anyway.
 
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