Friday Joke

Cosimo

Cosimo

Cosimo

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9 Jan 2007
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Paddy goes to the doctors and says he has a pain in his back side and asks the doctor to take a look. He takes off his trousers and bends over.

The doctor says, "You've got something sticking out of your arse." "Take it out then", Paddy says and the doctor takes it out. He unrolls it and sees it is a £10 note. Just as he pulls it out another one sticks out but this time it's a £20 pound note.

Every time the doctor pulls a note out it's replaced by another one. Eventually after half an hour he's got them all out. The doctor counts the money and says "You have £1,990 here".

"Thought as much", Paddy says, "I didn't think I was feeling too grand."
 
An Indian tracker is taking some pioneers through the plains in the mid-1800's. Suddenly he stops and points. "Bear have babies." He says.

One of the younger pioneers runs up and asks, "How'd you know that!?."

"I know these things," replied the Indian.

They continue their journey, and a little while later the Indian stops, points, and says, "deer tracks."

"How'd you know that!?" asks the young pioneer once again.

"I know these things."

After another hour of journeying, the Indian jumps of his horse and puts his ear to the ground. "Buffalo come."

"How'd you know that!?"

"Ear wet."
 
Friday funny

Shamelessly stolen!

Stevie Wonder is playing a concert in Tokyo and he asks if there are any requests. A small japanese man stands up and says 'play a jazz chord'. So Stevie plays the most amazing and soulful Jazz song you have ever heard. He finishes and asks if there are any more requests.

The same Japanese man stands up and says 'play a jazz chord'. So Stevie stands up and says 'If you think you can do any better then come up and try it ya slanty eyed ****!'

So the Japanese man gets up on stage and starts to sing "A jazz chord to say I ruv you".
 
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