Penguin Jokes: just getting worse!

buy_my_cookies

buy_my_cookies

buy_my_cookies

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Seriously who writes this stuff now? I don’t ever remember them being this bad!

Q…Why cant penguins fly?

A…Because they don’t have enough money to buy plane tickets.

Looooooooo******oooooooL

EDIT: i did miss the 'e' sorry!
 
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How do you turn a penguin into a soul singer?

Put it in the microwave until its bill withers.


Why don't you see penguins in the UK?

Because they are afraid of Wales.
 
A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he notices that the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station.

After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big bowl of vanilla ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands, he makes a real mess trying to eat with his little flippers.

After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he’s found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says, “It looks like you've blown a seal.”

“No, no,” the penguin replies, “it’s just a little ice cream.“
 
gillywibble said:
A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he notices that the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station.

After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big bowl of vanilla ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands, he makes a real mess trying to eat with his little flippers.

After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he’s found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says, “It looks like you've blown a seal.”

“No, no,” the penguin replies, “it’s just a little ice cream.“
Click to expand...

a classic :D
 
gillywibble said:
A vacationing penguin is driving through Arizona when he notices that the oil-pressure light is on. He gets out to look and sees oil dripping out of the motor. He drives to the nearest town and stops at the first gas station.

After dropping the car off, the penguin goes for a walk around town. He sees an ice-cream shop and, being a penguin in Arizona, decides that something cold would really hit the spot. He gets a big bowl of vanilla ice cream and sits down to eat. Having no hands, he makes a real mess trying to eat with his little flippers.

After finishing his ice cream, he goes back to the gas station and asks the mechanic if he’s found the problem. The mechanic looks up and says, “It looks like you've blown a seal.”

“No, no,” the penguin replies, “it’s just a little ice cream.“
Click to expand...

Raised a smile but not laughing yet...
 
SilverTongue said:
Raised a smile but not laughing yet...
Click to expand...

You won't laugh after this lot:

How do Penguins drink their cola?

On the rocks.


Who is a penguin's favourite pop star?

Seal.


Why can't polar bears in penguins?

Because they can't get the wrappers off.
 
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