Have you ever . . Thread

[Participant]

Have you ever had a wee in the shower?

Now I never have, but it lead to a rather interesting conversation with my girlfriend as our toilet was blocked on Saturday and she informed me she does it all the time and I should just do it.

Ex housemate used to wee in the bath, while he was in it. Thought it was perfectly normal and acceptable.

 

[I get around]

Have you ever sent a text meant for a mate to your mum/ dad by accident?

I meant to send one to my mate dan once, went to my dad. "Yeah we were just talking and all of a sudden she ****ing pounced on me, she was sucking me off and then tom walked in the room so I threw an empty bottle at him and told him to **** off" (To sum it up)
I actually got a text back from my dad.
"Good lad"

 

[platypus]

No, but then I can't remember the last time I sent a text message.

 

[WillyNelson]

Have you ever had a wee in the shower?

All the time. What's the point getting out of the shower to have a pee. Worse is when you have raging diarrhea & the only way to solve it is to get in the shower & let rip!

On that note: have you ever **** your pants?

 

[Participant]

All the time. What's the point getting out of the shower to have a pee. Worse is when you have raging diarrhea & the only way to solve it is to get in the shower & let rip!

On that note: have you ever **** your pants?

Once or twice, a little nugget has come out when someone has made me laugh uncontrollably, or when I've tried to sneak out a stinker and followed through. Never through fear or drunkenness though.

Have you ever been thrown out of church for having the uncontrollable giggles?

 

[Gaygle]

Have you ever pulled a girl you knew your friend liked?

 

[The Dread Pirate]

All the time. What's the point getting out of the shower to have a pee. Worse is when you have raging diarrhea & the only way to solve it is to get in the shower & let rip!

On that note: have you ever **** your pants?

No hence I **** out a tree and against a wall at download had to use the boxers as toilet paper though so they did promptly disappear.

edit: actually I tell a lie when I was 0-2 years old and not potty trained yes i did **** my pants.

 

[britboy4321]

Have you ever ...

Let a girl pay you £100 to pearce your nob because she wants to practice it and you're a skint student?

 

[Cosimo]

Yes I've also taken a dump on someones car, off a roof, out of a tree & Once over by a wall at download festival(I couldn't be ****ed to que for an arena toilet or head back to a campsite Toilet Incidentally thats how I lost my underwear).

You seem to be quite an expert, got any tips?

 

[Third Opinion]

Have u ever met up with a girl from facebook purely to Roger them

 

[The Dread Pirate]

You seem to be quite an expert, got any tips?

Only one don't force it let it happen naturally.

 

[I get around]

On that note: have you ever **** your pants?

Yes, once, a little bit forced its way out when I was walking home (It was like an hour and a half walk and I was dying for a dump about halfway through). I was on my own thank god so when the nugget forced its way out I ran over to the nearest bush and let rip, wiped my arse with my boxers and then walked off.

Now whenever I've got a long walk ahead of me I make a point to evacuate my bowels before embarking on the journey.

Let a girl pay you £100 to pearce your nob because she wants to practice it and you're a skint student?

No but I have had my nob pierced so 2 of my mates also had to have it done. Took it out after a few weeks.

 

[The Dread Pirate]

Yes, once, a little bit forced its way out when I was walking home (It was like an hour and a half walk and I was dying for a dump about halfway through). I was on my own thank god so when the nugget forced its way out I ran over to the nearest bush and let rip, wiped my arse with my boxers and then walked off.

I hope you disposed of the underwear if you didn't you're a sick sick man!

 

[Nix]

Have you ever put a kiss on the end of a text to a mate?

Have you ever forgot your wifes birthday until the morning?

Yes, for the lulz.

Not married.

Have you ever sneezed and wee'd a little?

Can't say I have.

...been talking to someone and accidentally spat on them a little bit, then had a few seconds of panic whilst wondering if they noticed or not?

Yup. Always seem to do it when I've completely forgot that it's a possible consequence.

Have you ever ... imagined you are a bomber pilot in WW2 when on the bog? Bombs away!

Nope.

Accidentally sent a soppy text intended for the Mrs. to one of your mates .

Nope. Nearly did once or twice though.

Have you ever kissed one of your (same sex) mates on the lips?

Not that I can remember of, no.

Have you ever taken a dump in a garden?

No, but when I was about seven I took a dump on an old pill-box once in the middle of nowhere. The nasty thing I remember though, is the dog jumped up and tried to eat it.

Ever got drunk and tried to chat up a really attractive blonde, while talking go to scratch your head but misjudge where your arm is and plant a rather solid uppercut right under her jaw?

Urm, not quite. I have made a complete tit of myself on a few occassions though. I did accidently elbow an ex (well, if you can call her that) in the face when I was drunk once. Can't say I intended to, but I felt quite satisfied about it if truth be told.

Have you ever had your mum walk in on you whilst going at it with your girlfriend?

Have you ever snapped your banjo string?

Nope.

Yep. Was kicked in the fruit and veg about 8 years ago by my brother and ended up snapping the string. It was like weeing through a hot needle for weeks afterwards.

Have you ever been caught by your Mum whilst you were polishing your rocket?

No.

Have you ever really... really ever loved, a woooooman!

Nope. I thought I did once, but it turned out it was just indigestion.

Have you ever had a wee in the shower?

More than likely.

On that note: have you ever **** your pants?

Quite possibly. If I did it would've been when I was younger. I don't recall it but I'm not ruling it out completely. Thankfully, I've always managed to get to a toilet just in time for a mission-critical Mr Whippy.

Have you ever pulled a girl you knew your friend liked?

Yep. Felt pretty bad about it too, for all of about 30 seconds.

Have u ever met up with a girl from facebook purely to Roger them

Near enough. Social networking would be a better catch-all, and yeah.

 

[bledd]

I've never bought a newspaper and have never cooked a potato (discluding oven chips)

My dad laughed hard when I told him that

 

[N19h7m4r3]

I never missed the GF's birthday or forgot it, but I made the vital mistake of getting her nothing but a card after she insisted for months that she doesn't want anything but me.

Never, ever will I believe them again when they say that, or actually listen to it.

 

[I get around]

I hope you disposed of the underwear if you didn't you're a sick sick man!

In my defense I was in the middle of nowhere, and i'm hardly gonna carry my ****ty boxers to the next bin when it's miles down the road.

 

[Deadbeat]

Have you ever jumped on the grenade while playing wingman?

If you don't know, it's your solemn duty as a Man to facilitate your mate's attempt at cracking on to a stunner by engaging her fugly friend.

Did you go a little too far and end up mounting the beast?

Regardless of the above situation, have you ever jumped a whale for the sake of jumping a whale?

 

[snowdog]

Have you ever peed in a garbage bin because you were too tired/drunk and confused it with your toilet ?

 

[Cosimo]

Have you ever peed in a garbage bin because you were too tired/drunk and confused it with your toilet ?

Nope, I’ve fallen into ditches, lain in gutters but never mistaken a tin or a bin for a proper loo. Have you?