My wife just told me she likes somone else

Of course he can trust her.

She's his wife for petes sake. Are you in a long term relationship ? you have some very weird views?

She obviously saying that for one of a couple of different reasons. It could be because:

1) she feels she needs to hurt him, and has said this to provoke a reaction to see if he hurts as much as she does, or plainly just to spite him.
2) its entirely true, she's found another man who is treating her like a man in the honeymoon period does. All chocolates, flowers and romance.
3) its only partially true, she feels like she wants another man because she feels she's not getting what she wants out of the romance and this is a cry for help.

Only she can tell you which of the three it is. He needs to talk to her about what she's feeling and what she wants. Not ask OcUK to tell him to do her sister.

Of course he can't trust her. She's admitted to liking someone else. What has she already done she hasn't told him? It isn't my views that are bizarre - you are coming across as an all embracing tree hugger to me. What's wrong with you?
 
nothing we can post will tell him why she said that.

Once he's got the full picture of whats going on, if this other man exists, how far she is into a relationship with him etc.. then maybe we can advise what we would do in that scenario.

But the question is still

1) Should i belive her, or is she just getting at me?

and

2) If she means it how do i find out who it is ?

We cant answer 1). He needs to speak to her about what this means. Nothing we call tell him will help him find out from her whats going on

and its pointless answering 2) until we know if this other man even exists. If he does, the question is not "how can i find out who he is" but instead "is my marriage repairable, and where do we go from here"

Not instantly think about finding him in some form of revenge mission.


Of course he can't trust her. She's admitted to liking someone else. What has she already done she hasn't told him? It isn't my views that are bizarre - you are coming across as an all embracing tree hugger to me. What's wrong with you?

You dont even know if this man exists. It could be she's feeling neglected and has made this up to make him feel jealous and hurt like she does.

He needs to speak to her to find out whats going on. She's the only one who can tell him if its true.
 
You dont even know if this man exists. It could be she's feeling neglected and has made this up to make him feel jealous and hurt like she does.

He needs to speak to her to find out whats going on. She's the only one who can tell him if its true.

I accept that. For the record, I have never said he shouldn't talk to her, I was getting on my soapbox about whether he should have solicited advice on here, which I maintain he was within his right to do.
 
Oh yeah he's got a right

i just dont think until he knows fully whats going on theres any point.

Asking "what would you do in this scenario" on an internet forum Yes. Asking "is my wife telling me the truth" on an internet forum ... well thats just insane.
 
well, I am sitting here still in me jaamers after reading all this, and the linked threads.
I really must take GD link off my toolbar, its just too easy to click while I'm printing summat, or holding the phone to the tax office or british gas, then I get sidelined, then its 11. 25 and I am in jaamers, and if it was Himself I'd go postal at him.
 
I would tell her the grass is always greener and if thats what she wants then tell her to, erm, go away (but not so nice)

Stelly
 
You dont even know if this man exists. It could be she's feeling neglected and has made this up to make him feel jealous and hurt like she does.

He needs to speak to her to find out whats going on. She's the only one who can tell him if its true.

Madrapper is correct with one thing, He cannot trust her. If the man does exist then she has betrayed his trust by potentially initiating a relationship or at the very least has entertained the idea of doing so.

If He does not exist then she has lied to elicit a specific response from her Husband, again betraying his trust.

Her reasons are irrelevent to the issue of trust itself.
 
Back
Top Bottom