Best Man Speech

ShaolinDreams

ShaolinDreams

ShaolinDreams

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Hi chaps,

As the title suggests i have best man's duty coming up real soon. An old friend has asked me to take over best man role as his brother has become unavailable. Thing is the wedding is in one week! I hate speaking to an audience so my speech needs to be as short and sweet as possible, the bare minimum without appearing to be rude.

Any suggestions guys? Thanks :p
 
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"Welcome, We've all had the Bride so there's not much to say other than raise our glasses & hope the baby isn't ours"
 
I always find it disappointing if the best mans speech is short. People are really looking forward to it, and it has to be funny - but they're the best audience ever, they really want you to be funny.

One week is plenty long enough for you to speak to people, put actual content into the speech, and rehearse it properly.
 
Planned in the week prior to the wedding whilst in LA and wrote it in the hot tub on the night before the wedding.

Went down a storm.

It's quite easy, you must know stories, get embarrasing stories in there. DOn;t get jokes off the web, they are crap and cringeworthy!
 
rehearse but dont become scripted. use bullet points to remember ie one word hints. use the banter to follow on. Oh and use props thats always fun.



rotters
 
Should take a laptop & display photo shopped pics on a Massive wall. :D
 
Did this twice last year, trust me the speech is the least of your worries when you've got to arrange the stag do. :)

Tips for the speech: start writing it WELL in advance, I think I started 2 months before the big day. Structure your speech in your head, the opener, couple of gags, couple of stories from the past, wind it up with kind words and thanks to those needed, and of course the toast. Rehearse lots, and not just to yourself. Pick a mate, or the Mrs (actually both) and read it to them a week before the day. That way if you've overstepped or undershot any boundaries you've got a chance to edit it. I also found random nuggets of inspiration would hit me at random times of the day. Couple of times I found myself up at 2am writing bits of the speech, or rushing home from work to get it down on paper before it left my head.

Also, try something a bit different to the usual speeches that make the groom squirm or people look on in horror. Sure poke fun, but I pictured myself in that position and I couldn't bring myself to shame and embarrass my best mate and his new wife on their special day. I'm sure loads will disagree and say it's expected of the best man, but I managed to get laughs without resorting to embarrassing the guy.

To break the speech up I ran a raffle, so before everyone sat down to dinner we handed out raffle tickets to the guests. Prizes were mugs with pictures of the groom in funny or slightly risque (not too risque, although there were plenty of pics!) positions. I also got 100 keyrings made up, but kept those quiet until the very end then announced that due to a little oversight on my part I had a surplus. So every guest got a little piece of groom-a-mabilia to take home. Went down really well, that is to say the mother-in-law still has it on her keys. :D
 
Here you go:

Welcome, she’s (insert name) about to embark on a voyage of love and discovery, had by many fancied by only one. He’s (inset name) a fun chap full of life and the soul of the party. Let’s hope he’s still got something to give. Seriously folks it’s a match made in heaven, just wait for the fireworks to begin. So raise your glasses to xxxx and xxxx , may your love and happiness endure, blah blah blah…… Love and Happiness!

If I can manage a few words so can you. Make it brief with a wee bit of humour. You can buy me a drink after you've said it. :D
 
A recent wedding I attended had a good best man speech. Bearing in mind that there was grandparents and kids scattered all over the place...

He started with... "Well I had a few lines prepared but I snorted them earlier...."
 
Think about the makeup of the audience. I did my brothers and it was mostly family, I went for more gentle humour and it went down well. Some of the things you and/or his other mates might find hilarious might not be taken the same way say by his gran or the in laws. If its mostly mates/you know the family there will be ok with it/ you can be a bit more risque perhaps.

Ask your mate if there are any taboo subjects. I didn't make many jokes about my bro's misses as I know she can take things the wrong way sometimes so I just concentrated on him, and also some jokes at my own expense.
 
Thanks for the tips guys.

any rough templates? :p i'm dreading this speech now.

How about i come out with a really long piece of paper and give a brief speech... thus making it a joke that they thought i was going to give a long winded speech?

• Thanking everyone for attending on special day
• Introducing myself
• Few words about the groom
• Couple of compliments to the bride
• One pearl of wisdom (funny?)
• Toast to the bride and groom

What do you guys think?

Thx again
 
Do your thanks towards the end, so you can tie it into the mushy stuff. Few words about yourself and your relation to the groom to kick things off I'd say.
 
ShaolinDreams said:
Thanks for the tips guys.

any rough templates? :p i'm dreading this speech now.

How about i come out with a really long piece of paper and give a brief speech... thus making it a joke that they thought i was going to give a long winded speech?

• Thanking everyone for attending on special day
• Introducing myself
• Few words about the groom
• Couple of compliments to the bride
• One pearl of wisdom (funny?)
• Toast to the bride and groom

What do you guys think?

Thx again
Click to expand...

You need stories about the groom.

Do you have a master of ceremonies or are you doing it?
 
I wouldn't worry about it too much in all honesty. I've been to 4 weddings in the last few years and all the speeches were ok but no one cares once its over good or bad long or short, they just want to start drinking/dancing People will talk about the entertainment or how fat/thin/lovely the bride looked but I've never yet heard anyone comment on the speeches apart from a) one of them went on so long when he finished literally half the room got up to go and pee and b) one where the best man accidentally said the name of the dead wife when talking about the couple.

Far too much is made of how vital the speech is in my opinion.

My brother was my best man and at 21 with no experience at all of speaking to groups he did really well, got a few big laughs and was fine. Properly nervous for the first 2 minutes though much like I was but once you start its fine. Just don't make any silly jokes about having the bride or her mother. Never go down well.

I also made my brothers life difficult because up until I was 19 I was such a recluse that he had very few stories to draw on. I never got caught "smashing" anyone on a park bench at uni, I never got arrested for peeing on a police car etc etc. But he worked that in to his speech and got a bit of a giggle out of people because they all knew what I was like.

Do
Speak clearly and confidently
Take your time
Compliment the bride

Don't
Mumble
Rush
Take the **** too much

Remember that you are not (I assume) a comedian or a writer. Everyone else will know that and so are not expecting you to make them cry tears of laugher
 
Todge hit the nail on the head. You're not a great comedian or writer, so don't pretend to be. A friendly grilling of the groom is customary, so feel free to poke fun at him a bit, but don't make your speech the centrepiece of the wedding. Sometimes it's nice to just wish them both the best.
 
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