My Top 23 Movie Musts

some more

Car doors are always 100% bullet proof

When hero's rear car window is hit by a bullet it will shatter. The shattered window then becomes a forcefield that stops all bullets from hitting people in a car.

No matter how badly the hero is injured, or how many times the hero is shot by the end of the film it will be only a flesh wound.
 
After a night of presumably rampant sex, in the morning the woman will always coyly cover her womanly bits with folds of blanket. If she gets up she will take the whole blanket with her.

Any mechanical lock can be instantly disabled by one round fire from a hand gun. This is particularly true of padlocks on chain fence gates.

Guns in general come equiped with special sound amplifiers to ensure any round fired sounds like a canon going off, and nothing like what they actually sound like on the news during some siege or other.

To qualify as being a villain a person has to be either a)British or b)English in the eventuality that Mel Gibson is directing the film. They are allowed to be non British as long as it is understood there will at some point be an opportunity to ultimately blame the British for whatever the evil plan happens to be at whatever stage.
 
Bubo said:
After a night of presumably rampant sex, in the morning the woman will always coyly cover her womanly bits with folds of blanket. If she gets up she will take the whole blanket with her.
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My wife refers to this as "L shaped sheets". The man has a half length sheet, so he can leave his manly chest exposed. The woman has a full length sheet so she is fully covered.

Bubo said:
Guns in general come equiped with special sound amplifiers to ensure any round fired sounds like a canon going off, and nothing like what they actually sound like on the news during some siege or other.
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Corollary: Any gun equipped with a silencer sounds makes no more noise than the subtlest of farts.
 
Meridian said:
The best way to conduct a search for something/one who is incredibly dangerous is to split up.

Basement lights never work.


M
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p4radox said:
Also: when the light switch is flicked to turn on the lights in a large warehouse/archive, the lighting strips will turn on sequentially down the length of the room, each accompanied by a "thud" sound.
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Additional: If by some miricle the basement lights are working they're garunteed to break just before or during the time that things start to get exciting.

edit: Also the ****ty handling of big american muscle cars appers to have been magically fixed for any film
 
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When the dead rise and start eating the living, infecting them so they become undead as well, all characters must act like they've never come across the concept of zombies before. The idea of even mentioning the Z word seems taboo.
 
Belmit said:
When the dead rise and start eating the living, infecting them so they become undead as well, all characters must act like they've never come across the concept of zombies before. The idea of even mentioning the Z word seems taboo.
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That's why i liked From Dusk Til Dawn, as the concept of Vampires isn't new to them.
 
When someone types on a keyboard, the characters will appear on screen at a uniform rate which is entirely unconnected to the sound of the keys being tapped. Also, when a computer crashes, it is essential for the user to type as fast as possible.

p4radox said:
Also: when the light switch is flicked to turn on the lights in a large warehouse/archive, the lighting strips will turn on sequentially down the length of the room, each accompanied by a "thud" sound.
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The opposite is also true: when the power is cut, the lights down the street / area / city will progressively turn off over a few seconds.
 
It is well known that whenever a law enforcement body is to enter a private residence for the purposes of carrying out an investigation they must first arrange with the local power company that all internal lights are to be disabled to ensure that they don't have to waste valuable seconds trying the light switch just inside the door, and simply pull out their maglites instead.
 
All bombs have an LED screen showing the remaining time until explosion in seconds. Also a small speaker that emits a beep with each passing second.
 
Any urban car chase must involve the destruction of at least two of the following elements
1) A large sheet of plate glass
2) A fruit stand, preferably stocked solely with watermelons
3) Crated chickens
4) A large pile of cardboard boxes.
 
In a car chase, there are never any downshifts, just what appears to be 74 speed racing gearbox!
 
Sirrel Squirrel said:
Kind of related to the above, the hero is able to shoot anyone with pin point accuracy except for the lead villain.
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My family and I sat watching Star Wars Ep 4 ANH over the weekend and during the Death Star escape sequence the shooting is shockingly variable. Luke can't hit a stormtroper standing almost in front of him but manages to shoot out the door control panel to close off Vader's approach (after he "kills" Obi-Wan) with amazing accuracy from twice the distance. :D Even my 5 year old noticed.
 
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