End of relationships - How do you eat yours

My relationship with my last girlfriend ended back in Feb after we had been together for 4 1/2 years and she ended it. At the end of the day and I realise looking back now that we had basicially grown apart and things had not been great for a while, but you could say that it really did hit me really hard at the time. I had to move back in with my Mum which felt really strange and for the first 2 days after we broke up it did not sink in at all, but then after that - it really sank in properly and it was horrible.

Indeed what I could describe the feeling was like being in a really really dark depressing place, and constantly thinking that what else have you got look forward to in life & never ever finding another girl again, but suicide never once crossed my mind.

Since breaking up, we have always still remained friends and kept in contact. I'd say that for me to get back to normal it did take a good couple of months, and as people kept telling me - time really is a great healer.

At the same time that we broke up as well, I was quite overweight and weighed over 15 stone. Instantly after we broke up, I completely lost my appetite for food - and this lasted for nearly 2 months, I didn't starve myself or anything drastic like that but I ate no where as near as I usually used to.

If anything, the break up and temporiarly loosing my appetite helped give me that kick up the arse to start loosing weight and in the March I joined the gym.

I think the main things that got me through after the end of the relationship was my good friends, family & the change in my lifestyle that I really needed i.e. the gym.

I've not got with anyone else since the relationship ended, which is now knocking over 6 months ago (damn, time has really flown by!) and the way I have felt for the last few months was that it's best for me to stay single for a while. If the right girl came along again anytime soon, I would go ahead and and go for it - but take it slow :)

Liam
 
I've had 3 serious relationships.

The first one I ended the relationship but wanted to try and remain friends. However, I met my second shortly after and entered a relationship with her. It was way too soon and I wasn't properly over my first which caused all kinds of problems with the second. But I'm glad it happened because it's a lesson learnt.

Said second ended the relationship and I tried to remain friends with her. Wanted her back for the longest time and it took me a long time to get over her. Again, I learnt a lot from that.

My third and latest ended it about 4 months ago. Wasn't with her for as long as the other two but had much stronger feelings for her than I ever did anyone else. Gauging my success with trying to be friends in the past, I decided to go down the no contact route. Was going well until about a month ago she contacted me and keeps trying to talk to me. Stupidly I allowed myself to swap a few messages with her back and forth but eventually I told her it's best we didn't speak any more.

Hmm.
 
iDroid84 said:
End of relationships, how do I eat mine? - I find another girl to eat.
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Just cheat on them toward-ish (that isn't even a work) the end of the relationship. Simple. You get your dick wet, plus its easier to finally break up then. Always remember though, to wrap your tool before you enter the abyss.
 
A few years ago id have supported the shrug it off, but me and my gf have now been together 6 years this month, and if things ended between us i know id take that as hard as hell, and would probably be in a pretty bad way.
 
Hlebio said:
I've had 3 serious relationships.

The first one I ended the relationship but wanted to try and remain friends. However, I met my second shortly after and entered a relationship with her. It was way too soon and I wasn't properly over my first which caused all kinds of problems with the second. But I'm glad it happened because it's a lesson learnt.

Said second ended the relationship and I tried to remain friends with her. Wanted her back for the longest time and it took me a long time to get over her. Again, I learnt a lot from that.

My third and latest ended it about 4 months ago. Wasn't with her for as long as the other two but had much stronger feelings for her than I ever did anyone else. Gauging my success with trying to be friends in the past, I decided to go down the no contact route. Was going well until about a month ago she contacted me and keeps trying to talk to me. Stupidly I allowed myself to swap a few messages with her back and forth but eventually I told her it's best we didn't speak any more.

Hmm.
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Friends with benefits has never, and will never be a bad thing! lol :p
 
hey guys.. i'd really appreciate opinions on this one. :confused:

i was seeing a woman for over 18mths (living together for 6mths) and we were going to get married, buy a house together etc etc. she was working for this mob who started to treat her really badly and in the end she quit. the same sort of thing had happened at work before and she kind of had a nervous breakdown over it. i tried to be supportive but she started getting really abusive toward me and after a while i asked her to go. i said a few mean things but i was trying to be as reasonable as i could. well based on this, she turned up at my house unannounced twice (once when i wasn't there) to remove all her stuff. i sent her an email saying this freaked me out a bit and she responded with an email telling me i'm abusive and not to contact her again. she also added that i should "get a life".

so yes, i went from being the most awesome guy in the whole world to an abusive ******** within about two months. i'm pretty shocked by the whole thing and i think it'll take me ages to get over it.

:( as i say, any advice/opinions would be good.

cheers.
 
thanks.. i sort of knew/know this but it's good to hear from a neutral party. my life is already better but this just eats at me you know? i'm way too stubborn/proud to contact her though.
 
Don't contact her - I don't think you have any need to? She sounds an annoying piece of work. A lot of people should say you should work at these things etc. but I don't think I could be bothered. I think if someone isn't going to be easy to have a relationship with, in that they're a fairly stable and sorted person, then it's fine to not be interested.
 
MrBojangles said:
oh and i forgot!! last i heard, she had a new job, even though her psychologist said she wasn't ready to go back to work. what the hell?
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Why are you caring? Stop caring now. Go to the pub, or go to a friends, or play some computer games, or listen to some music, or read a book. Do something else other than care! :p
 
PMKeates said:
Why are you caring? Stop caring now. Go to the pub, or go to a friends, or play some computer games, or listen to some music, or read a book. Do something else other than care! :p
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haha easier said than done.. break-up was only two months ago. but yes, i only really thought about it because i read this thread.
 
MrBojangles said:
well because i can't get answers as to what went on in her head anywhere else. i doubt she'd tell me the truth though anyway.
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I think we can safely say it's over between you and her. If it isn't, you should make it over. These sorts of events are the sort of crap we can all do without, and you will be better off and happier without them.

So... in that case, you don't need to care what went on. It's her problem. Move on with your life, be prosperous, eat cake.

Just do something other than wondering what if or caring. There's no reason to. Look to the future not the past!
 
MrBojangles said:
yes this is what happens when you stay with someone mainly because of physical attraction and good sex! thanks mate.
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Ohh this changes things. You should attempt to use her for sex, if possible. Leave it a month longer and begin minor communication. You must keep in mind the end goal is sex, not a relationship, and consider it a fail if you do anything other than have sex.
 
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