An awesomely exciting relationship thread

TBH i think the one thing you did wrong was not speak to the missus properly before you went to Oktoberfest fest.

Your mum was nice enough to help out with the cash after the unfortunate passport incident!
(im 24 and live on my own but i know if my mother could help out in times of needs like this she would be happy to)
But i think your GF is feeling like you took the money and ran off on holiday even if it was already booked and paid.
Best you can do is now you've apologised is start with making her feel less like a chump! Get with the romantic gestures, pay her whats owed and take her out.
If your relationship for some reason ends over such a small thing then i cant see it been worth it!
Your feeling a little guilt, its natural it will pass, communication with her is key.
 
Musty Pie said:
If you where financially secure getting your passport stolen would still not effect you that much as you would have money in "savings" to cover it.

My statement still stands regardless of circumstance. If you had no parents to bail you out you would have been screwed. Stop relying on your parents, grow some balls and sort yourself out.

No wonder your misses was ******, she appears to be dating a child as appose to a man. ;)
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I'm sorry, but I'd rather be making the most of my time here for the 2 years as opposed to always having some savings just in case. And how would I have been screwed without my parents? I would have had to shorten/cancel my trip and kept working after missing 1 of my only Europe summers.

I am just happy I have people in my life who make it possible for me to apparently not need to "grow some balls" :p
 
RopAyy said:
TBH i think the one thing you did wrong was not speak to the missus properly before you went to Oktoberfest fest.

Your mum was nice enough to help out with the cash after the unfortunate passport incident!
(im 24 and live on my own but i know if my mother could help out in times of needs like this she would be happy to)
But i think your GF is feeling like you took the money and ran off on holiday even if it was already booked and paid.
Best you can do is now you've apologised is start with making her feel less like a chump! Get with the romantic gestures, pay her whats owed and take her out.
If your relationship for some reason ends over such a small thing then i cant see it been worth it!
Your feeling a little guilt, its natural it will pass, communication with her is key.
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Thank you for that.
Basically was what happened, I saw it as ooh Oktoberfest is already paid and booked and how often will I get the chance to do this, I have some euro's on my euro card and didn't think about it from her point of view where she would be skint for the week until she got paid and I felt bad have spoken to her about it and it is somewhat resolved now. :)

I also will get on the romantic gestures as soon as I can!
 
FNGsam said:
And how would I have been screwed without my parents? I would have had to shorten/cancel my trip and kept working after missing 1 of my only Europe summers.
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This is what would most people would have done. Missed out on the "luxury" instead of sponging off of others to achieve it.

Live within your means mate its what most people have to do.
 
Sidenote : is the "great OE" the same for Ozzies as it is for Kiwis? I could feel my stance softening if this were the case but then hardening again if you didn't know what I meant.

Wait - is anyone else physically aroused?
 
FNGsam said:
Thank you for that.
Basically was what happened, I saw it as ooh Oktoberfest is already paid and booked and how often will I get the chance to do this, I have some euro's on my euro card and didn't think about it from her point of view where she would be skint for the week until she got paid and I felt bad have spoken to her about it and it is somewhat resolved now. :)

I also will get on the romantic gestures as soon as I can!
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Send flowers to her work.

Honestly.
 
While you have been a bit of an idiot to rely on other people for your finances, I can see that it was unavoidable. That said, when you saw the money your mother said she'd lend (give?) you wasn't in your account, you should have spoken to your mum about it to see about getting the money asap. If that failed, your next port of call should have been to ask the landlord for an extension, before shouldering the responsibility onto your girlfriend (unless she offered.. and you made sure she was ok with it).

That said, all is done and you're left with an annoyed girlfriend which is never a good thing and from my experience, you're going to have to do something to make it up to her. See that she gets the new year thing booked and offer to help finance it (was going to say take a credit card with 0% interest for x months and pay it off sensibly but I'm not sure you've learnt enough lessons about money yet). If you're absolutely down in the dumps financially, at least pay her back quickly with your mums money and pull out the romancin'
 
kaffe said:
Send flowers to her work.

Honestly.
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As the scale of The Stupid Thing A Man Has Done goes up then the tribute also increases in scale.

Not sure flowers is gonna cut it here. Maybe a Porsche.

e : And actually, thinking about this, you're one of the few women who post here and this is really terrible advice! He could talk to her, work things through or do something else which has actual meaning but flowers is the answer? Come on, life isn't a rom com where the nice bunch of flowers fixes that stupid mistake you made.
 
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Musty Pie said:
This is what would most people would have done. Missed out on the "luxury" instead of sponging off of others to achieve it.

Live within your means mate its what most people have to do.
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So your telling me, trip of a life time booked then some crap like your passport been stolen happens and costs you a bomb to get sorted. You plan to reduce your trip but your mother (or anyone for that matter) offers you the lost out cash so you can really enjoy yourself and youd decline it?

Dont give me that!

Yes its really crap that it didnt come through in time and his gf fronted the rent (which was very nice of her) and i can see why she got peeved with him going to Oktoberfest but if he'd have communicated a little better this issue would have been avoided.
 
yer_averagejoe said:
While you have been a bit of an idiot to rely on other people for your finances, I can see that it was unavoidable. That said, when you saw the money your mother said she'd lend (give?) you wasn't in your account, you should have spoken to your mum about it to see about getting the money asap. If that failed, your next port of call should have been to ask the landlord for an extension, before shouldering the responsibility onto your girlfriend (unless she offered.. and you made sure she was ok with it).

That said, all is done and you're left with an annoyed girlfriend which is never a good thing and from my experience, you're going to have to do something to make it up to her. See that she gets the new year thing booked and offer to help finance it (was going to say take a credit card with 0% interest for x months and pay it off sensibly but I'm not sure you've learnt enough lessons about money yet). If you're absolutely down in the dumps financially, at least pay her back quickly with your mums money and pull out the romancin'
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I was using a travelex cash passport while overseas, which had my funds pre-loaded onto it, so I didn't really check my account as often as I obviously should have. I did ask mum about once a week or so. I live with my girlfriend and she did offer, but I initially said no because of mum but then obviously that didn't work out so I backtracked on that.

Yeh it is basically all sorted and like you said it is done now. I wouldn't get approved for the credit card anyways as I'm not a british citizen, so that is a no go anyways ;)
 
[FnG]magnolia;20226404 said:
As the scale of The Stupid Thing A Man Has Done goes up then the tribute also increases in scale.

Not sure flowers is gonna cut it here. Maybe a Porsche.
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Haha this is hardly a massive deal. She feels a little hard done to as he spent 'spending money' on an already booked holiday. Granted he already owed money to his GF but i think she may have felt bad in the end stopping him going, hes paid her back pretty quick and im sure she has booked her NYE trip now.

Flowers, chocs, wine and a nice meal out. Give her some love and im fair sure she will forgive you and know you realise what she did for you meant a lot.
 
RopAyy said:
So your telling me, trip of a life time booked then some crap like your passport been stolen happens and costs you a bomb to get sorted. You plan to reduce your trip but your mother (or anyone for that matter) offers you the lost out cash so you can really enjoy yourself and youd decline it?

Dont give me that!
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Actually I would have declined it. I dont like borrowing money, I dont like taking hand outs. Its just the way I am.

If something happens thats "unfair" I deal with it. I dont expect hand outs from others.

Yes I will most likley rant and claim that the passport theft etc is "unfair" as most would (including the OP), but I would not expect others to bail me out.
 
[FnG]magnolia;20226404 said:
As the scale of The Stupid Thing A Man Has Done goes up then the tribute also increases in scale.

Not sure flowers is gonna cut it here. Maybe a Porsche.
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*ahem*

Most women will appreciate the little things more than the big purchases. If my ex screwed up, and I got mad at him, he'd do something little like make dinner then all would be fine again. I didn't really like it when he bought me things, was like he was trying to buy my forgiveness!!


Give her some super lovin' too.
 
Musty Pie said:
Actually I would have declined it. I dont like borrowing money, I dont like taking hand outs. Its just the way I am.

If something happens thats "unfair" I deal with it. I dont expect hand outs from others.

Yes I will most likley rant and claim that the passport theft etc is "unfair" as most would (including the OP), but I would not expect others to bail me out.
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I didn't expect it though?
It was offered the whole way through, I just didn't organise it quickly enough and didn't appreciate enough what my girlfriend has done for me at the time.
 
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