Stupid Manufacturer Designs

There's lots of cars with 'bad' designs like the VW's and Audi's that need the whole front end off the car to do the belts!

It's not really an issue tbh, it takes 20 mins to get the bumber off and thats at home, once you've swung all the AC & Rad out of the way you then get unrestricted access to the whole of the engine, if you combine a cambelt and waterpump change with other work it's great.

Plus it means the engines mounted the right way round ;)
 
Reading that, I'm wondering where the MAF is on my Scania..... 500BHP here I come? :p

Not sure they'd like you mucking about with the Scania... may aswell get a remap while you're at it? :p

I suppose the good side of all this is when I do get to where I want, I'll have around 45bhp more - should be noticeable at least.

Another stupid design in my car - to change a rear bulb you have to remove the rear light cluster from the vehicle - incredibly annoying.
 
Daft design on the Saab 9000 means that if there is any water on the hatch it dumps it all over the rear speakers when opened, unless you remember to open it half way to let the water drain off first.

Mondeo Mk3 does this, well not onto speakers but a load into the rear boot area, is very annoying.
 
You think your Derv 75 is bad, On the V6 you have to remove the inlet manifold for one side of the engine to change the spark plugs!
 
Mondeo Mk3 does this, well not onto speakers but a load into the rear boot area, is very annoying.

My Octavia dumps it all on the parcel shelf supports. I've actually got a cloth handy in the boot because if i don't catch it then it runs straight into the speakers :o
 
You think your Derv 75 is bad, On the V6 you have to remove the inlet manifold for one side of the engine to change the spark plugs!

Another reason my ZT V6 never got a proper service. Seems common to a lot of V6 engines that things tend to be in the way of the spark plugs - but then again for the noise of the V6 I could put up with a little bit of stupid design.

Now I have lots of stupid design, and a 4 pot dag dag. Life sucks. :p
 
If we are turning this into a 'stupid things which annoy manly home mechanics' thing rather than a 'stupid things which annoy the driver' thing then I nominate irritating BMW brittle BMW plastic BMW washer piping under the bonnet of my BMW which goes hard and splits. Grrr.

Then you try fixing it and it splits more. Grrr.
 
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So, so many things about Project Bentley spring to mind....made worse by the fact that this wasn't a cheap car when built by any stretch - so why did R-R/Bentley cheap out???

Take the electric windows. On earlier cars (Shadow 1s, T1s and back) these moved at a speed that can actually be measured. With the second series Shadow/T and later cars, they cheaped out on the system. Thin gauge wire so you can't get enough power to the motors (and it breaks very easily as well), they took the relays out of the design and changed the motors from proper dual-field direction control ones to ones where it just reverses the polarity to change between down and up. This was apparently to save weight. Weight saving measures, on a car this big? Really? Rubbish, it was about saving a few quid on each car sold. Fortunately, the car can be modified, and I shall be doing this next year.

Oh, and then there's the infamous rear window demist. Not one person alive today actually knows how it works. I have this theory that the design job was handed to a work experience boy who left after designing it and didn't document anything. Or maybe it was an old-timer at the factory who died after completing the job. At any rate, there isn't a switch for it like a sensible car would employ. It seems to tie into the air-con controls, but involves a timer, several relays which don't appear on the wiring diagrams, the cabin and outside temperature sensors, and probably half a dozen other things that I haven't even found yet. Why? Why would you do that, R-R/Bentley? Why do you hate your customers so much?

Another curious decision involved the seat electrics. Now, call me old fashioned but I think if I was designing in electric adjustment with a memory, I wouldn't make it so that if the (cheap, crap) battery that holds the memory in the ECU dies then the seat can't be moved. At all. I would probably keep the memory unit out of that main circuit, to be honest. There's no need for it to be tied in the way it is. Best part? When that battery inevitably dies, it leaks fluid all over the board in the ECU, and buggers it up completely. Cue a +£300 bill for a replacement one, and the dismantling of the seat to change it over. And there's an even better punchline to that one of course - since you can't move the seat until the new box is in, you'd better hope that when it died the seat was in a position that allows you to actually dismantle it without removing the centre console!

The rear suspension is my current gripe (actually a long term gripe, but since it's broken right now it's right at the forefront of my vitriol). R-R employed self-levelling at the rear of the car, operated by hydraulic struts that act as the shock absorbers as well. These are pressurised by an engine-driven pump. Now, the way they designed this was to buy a license for the rather excellent Citroen hydraulic setup. When they got this design back to the factory, they took all the good bits....and threw them in a skip. They then bodged together what was left, threw it on the cars and hoped for the best. What you're left with is a system that has 16 (!) bleed points, traps air like nothing else on this Earth, leaks hydraulic oil everywhere, isn't all that special for ride comfort, or handling, or even keeping the back of the car level to be honest, and is a wallet-draining nightmare of epic proportions when it inevitably goes wrong. Those struts, that are basically just fancy shock aborbers? More than £600. Each. For two pins, I'd rip the hydraulics all the way out and convert to standard Koni or Bilstein shocks....
 
The fact that on new cars youhave to pretty much dissasemble the whole front of the car to change a single bulb.

My lasses fiesta, you have to unbolt the bumper, remove the front grille, unbolt the heatlight cluster, remove the wiring harness and then you have access to change the single 60p bulb you just bought.

I prefer my rover. Lift up bonnet, remove rear cover, change bulb. I can do it in Asda carpark without a tool kit of any description.
 
[TW]Fox;20817433 said:
The mind numbingly stupid position of the air temp sensor for the climate control in the E39 and, staggeringly, the F10 5 Series.

It is directly behind the cupholder. Put a hot drink in the cupholder and all the temp sensor reads is hot air from the drink. It then pumps cold air into the cabin. I popped through the McDonalds drivethru last night, stuck the coke in the cupholder and within about 40 seconds the climate control was blasting out roasting hot air.

Sigh.

You'd think they'd have learned. The E60 didnt do it as the cupholders were in the dash rather than the centre console, but they are back in the centre console in the F10.. right in the same place once again.

Open the centre vents . . . . That's what they are there for.:D
 
Just about everything on an RS Clio.

6 hour job for cambelt, including stripping half the front end.
Ridiculously stubborn aux belt change.
Crank pulley has to come off to do the water pump, despite it being on the aux belt.
Similar story to do cam cover.
The whole subframe has to come down to do the gearbox.
 
The fact that on new cars youhave to pretty much dissasemble the whole front of the car to change a single bulb.

My lasses fiesta, you have to unbolt the bumper, remove the front grille, unbolt the heatlight cluster, remove the wiring harness and then you have access to change the single 60p bulb you just bought.

I prefer my rover. Lift up bonnet, remove rear cover, change bulb. I can do it in Asda carpark without a tool kit of any description.

On the Audi A6, you have to remove the air filter to get near the headlight on the driver side, on the passenger side you have to unscrew the power steering resevoir, the rear lights, you have to remove the clusters to change the bulbs.

On the Megane, you have to remove the front wheel to get access via the wheel arch th change the bulbs!
 
Megane "Big Butt" model headlight bulb replacement....

Accessed by a small hole in the wheel arch liner.... This makes changing the headlight bulbs difficult on the normal models and down right impossible on the RS models. You basically have to take the wheel off or remove the entire headlight cluster to change the bulbs.
 
Worst one I've seen by a mile has to be in my dads MX5.

The centre section has a compartment with a sliding lid about 1cm short than a credit card, so you can fit a card in there but it won't lay flat. If you put a card in there and shut the lid, the hook on the lock grabs onto the card and it's stuck. You then have to choose between dismantling the interior and destroying your cards pulling them out with pliers :D
 
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