Woman sets honeytrap, forum posters back her

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herzog Tue 10-Jan-12 16:36:50

My husband freely admits that he thinks he is having a midlife crisis. Although he is only mid 30s he has lost quite a lot of hair and is sensitive about his receding hairline, and other physical signs of ageing. He had an affair towards the end of last year with a work colleague - I believe him when he says that they are no longer sleeping together but they have to work together so it is not feasible to expect him to stop seeing her. She is married but emailled him over Christmas to say she is getting a divorce. He says that he wants to see if we can work things out and phoned the local marriage guidance counselling service so we are now on a waiting list for an initial appointment. He says that he had an affair because it was exciting and because our relationship had got too comfortable and that he currently doesn't feel any desire to be physically intimate with me although he says I'm his best friend and that we have fun doing stuff together.
I admit that our relationship had got comfortable and that we weren't prioritising each other as much as we should. We have a four year old daughter who we love, we both enjoy our jobs and we both separately enjoy lots of activities outside of working hours. Until recently we didn't socialise very much together as we didn't have a babysitter (since family moved closer we have all the help we need whenever we need it).
I thought that one of the ideals of marriage was to happily grow old together and that although looks, excitement, etc would diminish having your partner as a best friend was one of the joys. The news that he doesn't feel the same way has completely shattered my feeling of security.
What can I do to help turn this situation around?
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ohdearwhatdoidonow Tue 10-Jan-12 17:43:43

He sounds like a selfish, self obsessed immature ******. He'd have to do all the running for me to remotely care about him.
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On a nightshift tonight, I usually enjoy reading through GD to pass the time in between the work I actually have to do.

I followed this thread through to MN and now I feel ill. It is hell!
 
Just spent an hour reading random threads on there.

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Just found the thread of which OP speaks. It's pretty low of the woman to set the guy up, but to be fair to her, he did "bite" (proving her instincts right) which is equally bad if not worse. Sounds to me like there is a more fundamental problem with their relationship. Meh tbh. Not my concern.
 
JBod said:
Front page of that relationship forum "Found a file saved on my husbands PC"
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The guy made a typical schoolboy by actually downloading anything but seriously?

She thinks he's obviously going to screw her and his three children over because he watches some hard pr0n?

Does she actually live in the real world?
 
Mumsnet is proof (as if it was needed) that there are some evil, pathetic, horrible women out there.

It's like a gathering of Jeremy Kyle 'guests'. No woman with an ounce of self respect or decency would post on there.
 
"It sounds like they're all chavs - in fact a collection of feminist chavs, can you think of anything worse"

^ my GF's description of mumsnetlol just now :) Me = proud
 
HELP I DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT

"To think my fanjo has magically expanded?" Okay this is a serious Mooncup question. Has anyone had one of these for a year or so and then suddenly it starts leaking out the side? No visible holes. Previously watertight.
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I've had mine for 6 years. No leakage yet but I'm 30 tomorrow and wondering when I should move up to the bigger one. Surely my fanjo won't expand as soon as I hit 30!
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