The Health Emergency guide to how to speak Lansley
A:
- “Any Qualified Provider”
Any willing provider who fills in the right forms and is not bankrupt
B:
- “Bureaucracy”
Level of accountability that is to be abolished
C:
- “Clinical Commissioning Group”
Device to make GPs carry the can for unpopular decisions drawn up by the private sector
- “Commissioning Support Organisation”
Private sector company in charge of public-sector budget
D:
- “Doctors tell me they want these reforms”
I once met a doctor who told me he supported part of the Bill
- “Duty to secure that services are provided”
Secretary of State’s attempt to escape a duty to provide services
E:
- “Empowered”
Scapegoat-to-be
- “Excellent”
Description of any service offered by the private sector
- “Evidence shows…”
I’m making this up
F:
- “Fully engaged”
Patronised and treated as idiots
H:
- “Having a voice”
Roped into token toothless committees
- “Health and social care integration”
Cutting budgets for both health and social care
I:
- “In control”
Scapegoat-to-be
- “Independent”
A body stuffed with my supporters
- “Integrated”
Fragmented, perhaps linked by contracts
- “Intelligent commissioning”
Commissioning supported by private sector
- “Involve”
pretend to consult while ignoring
- “I’m not lonely”
Nobody agrees with me
L:
- “Listening exercise”
A period ostentatiously ignoring opposing views
- “Liberating the NHS”
Liberating the private sector
- “Liberalisation”
Privatisation
M:
- “Modernisation”
Rolling the clock back to the 1930s
- “Monitor”
McKinsey and co reshaping the NHS as a network for business
N:
- “National Health Service”
A cash pot to purchase services from private providers
- “Not privatising”
Privatising provision
- “No decision about me without me”
Every decision imposed from above
- “No top-down reorganisation”
Biggest reorganisation since 1948
O:
- “Our journey”
My hijack of the NHS
- “Outcomes”
Greater profits for private health providers
P:
- “Patient choice”
System foisted on patients giving them the right to choose the cheapest service
- “Private-sector efficiency”
The outcome of putting profits ahead of every other consideration and picking only profitable services, leaving the rest to the public sector
- “Private finance initiative”
Issue that allows me to blame Labour for their implementation of a Tory policy while I carry on signing new PFI deals
- “Promoting choice”
Privatisation
- “Ploughed back into patient care”
Ploughed into private sector
Q:
- “Qualified”
Not yet bankrupt
R:
- “Referral management”
Replaces patient choice with bureaucrats’ choice
S:
- “Shared decision-making”
The illusion that patients and GPs choose when their decisions are subject to referral management centres
- “Social enterprise”
Interim non-profit private provider paving the way for proper private takeover
- “Sustainable”
Private sector
T:
- “Thousands of GPs”
A tiny handful
- “Take the politics out of the discussion”
Please stop discussing the consequences if this Bill goes through
- “The Bill enjoys the support of all the clinical professions”
And there are fairies at the bottom of our garden
V:
- “Vested interests”
Anyone opposed to Lansley’s Bill, never private sector
W:
- “Working together”
In competition
A:
- “Any Qualified Provider”
Any willing provider who fills in the right forms and is not bankrupt
B:
- “Bureaucracy”
Level of accountability that is to be abolished
C:
- “Clinical Commissioning Group”
Device to make GPs carry the can for unpopular decisions drawn up by the private sector
- “Commissioning Support Organisation”
Private sector company in charge of public-sector budget
D:
- “Doctors tell me they want these reforms”
I once met a doctor who told me he supported part of the Bill
- “Duty to secure that services are provided”
Secretary of State’s attempt to escape a duty to provide services
E:
- “Empowered”
Scapegoat-to-be
- “Excellent”
Description of any service offered by the private sector
- “Evidence shows…”
I’m making this up
F:
- “Fully engaged”
Patronised and treated as idiots
H:
- “Having a voice”
Roped into token toothless committees
- “Health and social care integration”
Cutting budgets for both health and social care
I:
- “In control”
Scapegoat-to-be
- “Independent”
A body stuffed with my supporters
- “Integrated”
Fragmented, perhaps linked by contracts
- “Intelligent commissioning”
Commissioning supported by private sector
- “Involve”
pretend to consult while ignoring
- “I’m not lonely”
Nobody agrees with me
L:
- “Listening exercise”
A period ostentatiously ignoring opposing views
- “Liberating the NHS”
Liberating the private sector
- “Liberalisation”
Privatisation
M:
- “Modernisation”
Rolling the clock back to the 1930s
- “Monitor”
McKinsey and co reshaping the NHS as a network for business
N:
- “National Health Service”
A cash pot to purchase services from private providers
- “Not privatising”
Privatising provision
- “No decision about me without me”
Every decision imposed from above
- “No top-down reorganisation”
Biggest reorganisation since 1948
O:
- “Our journey”
My hijack of the NHS
- “Outcomes”
Greater profits for private health providers
P:
- “Patient choice”
System foisted on patients giving them the right to choose the cheapest service
- “Private-sector efficiency”
The outcome of putting profits ahead of every other consideration and picking only profitable services, leaving the rest to the public sector
- “Private finance initiative”
Issue that allows me to blame Labour for their implementation of a Tory policy while I carry on signing new PFI deals
- “Promoting choice”
Privatisation
- “Ploughed back into patient care”
Ploughed into private sector
Q:
- “Qualified”
Not yet bankrupt
R:
- “Referral management”
Replaces patient choice with bureaucrats’ choice
S:
- “Shared decision-making”
The illusion that patients and GPs choose when their decisions are subject to referral management centres
- “Social enterprise”
Interim non-profit private provider paving the way for proper private takeover
- “Sustainable”
Private sector
T:
- “Thousands of GPs”
A tiny handful
- “Take the politics out of the discussion”
Please stop discussing the consequences if this Bill goes through
- “The Bill enjoys the support of all the clinical professions”
And there are fairies at the bottom of our garden
V:
- “Vested interests”
Anyone opposed to Lansley’s Bill, never private sector
W:
- “Working together”
In competition



