Ever so slightly angry right now!
- Thread starter scratch
- Start date
Thank God that I always make my decisions independently and not based upon what a current girlfriend wants/desires, otherwise I'd be in a right mess now.
Most women don't know what they want. Make your own decisions, make them conform!
Most women don't know what they want. Make your own decisions, make them conform!
Yeah, basically if you're not alpha as **** you fail most of these tests.
Essentially, yes. There is a time and a place for being "Alpha" though. Some acts may seem like fitness tests but may be just genuine human behaviour whether related to a particular event or not and this is where you need to be a supporting and loving partner.
Learning the difference between the two can be difficult at first. It's hard to say what is at play in the OP's scenario but having not had contact for 3 days I'd say she is either very frightened and feeling like she has no other option, or it is a blatant fitness test. If she is really that frightened, and if you are the right person for her, you should be her first port of call for support. It's evident, however, that you are not.
If it's the latter, you need to alpha up. If it's not, then you should be there talking this through.
Soldato
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[FnG]magnolia;22491146 said:
He speaks the truth, if she wanted to be with you she wouldn't have mentioned this.
Why the quintuple face palm?
I'm about as non-alpha as one can possibly be and I've never failed any supposed test - of course, if I think a girl's playing silly buggers with me I nip it in the bud and move on. I think the big mistake here is not that you folks are failing 'loyalty tests', it's that you're dating the kind of women that feel the need to set tests to see if your relationship is solid.
ProTip: Step back, assess your life and stop dating emotionally retarded skanks.
Associate
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- 8 Jan 2007
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Awaits the return of scratch.
I agree that it's a lucky escape. If you had a relationship worth preserving then you wouldn't, all of a sudden, discover she had cold feet over moving in together, nor would it work out the way it has done since then.
Get out while you've been given this opportunity to do so. Call her today and tell her it's over.
You'll be financially out of pocket, but being stubborn no reason to go ahead with something that will ruin a year or two of your life.
This makes no difference at all & it's still just you chasing her.
Send her this text & forget her.
Text = You're Sacked.
You've taken the right decision by the sound of it. If she u-turned like that something clearly isn't right which is not the basis for a successful relationship going forward. I suppose there's always the possibility that there's something else going on in her life that has unsettled her, but then her explanation doesn't seem to suggest that.
Unfortunately the advice here seems right, time to end it and move on unless you have time to spare on a relationship that doesn't sound like it has a long term future (which as long as you know in theory it's not going anywhere is no problem either).
I'd be very surprised if within a day of ending it shes not back in touch with you saying it's cleared her mind, she didn't realise what she had til she lost it etc., for some reason people want what they can't have.
In any case, if you've got yourself into a good financial position, look to get yourself a good bachelor pad, focus on the future and a great start to the next chapter of your life. FWIW I concur with others here, when my now wife and I moved in together there was no hesitation or thinking about it, it felt right from the get go and was just a natural next step. If it's a tough thing for her to do now when it's supposed to be the most exciting thing and something you're both looking forward to, can you imagine what things will be like when times are tougher?!?
Good luck OP, hope it all works out well for you, you seem very mature in your attitude so I'm sure it will.
Unfortunately the advice here seems right, time to end it and move on unless you have time to spare on a relationship that doesn't sound like it has a long term future (which as long as you know in theory it's not going anywhere is no problem either).
I'd be very surprised if within a day of ending it shes not back in touch with you saying it's cleared her mind, she didn't realise what she had til she lost it etc., for some reason people want what they can't have.
In any case, if you've got yourself into a good financial position, look to get yourself a good bachelor pad, focus on the future and a great start to the next chapter of your life. FWIW I concur with others here, when my now wife and I moved in together there was no hesitation or thinking about it, it felt right from the get go and was just a natural next step. If it's a tough thing for her to do now when it's supposed to be the most exciting thing and something you're both looking forward to, can you imagine what things will be like when times are tougher?!?
Good luck OP, hope it all works out well for you, you seem very mature in your attitude so I'm sure it will.
I'm not chasing her, just want proper closure on things. I want to hear her side of what's going on; as much as she is messing me around she should at least get a chance to do that. I'm not going to let her get the upper hand in the situation and tell people that I was the one that left her.
