Dealing with the prospect of becoming a parent

How long have you been going out?

Pesonally I'm 21 and a student graduating next year, but even on a ~26k starting salary I'd never dream of wanting kids with my gf of 1+year that early!
 
ManLoveRulesOK said:
Firstly I apologise for the ramble.

My girlfriend spend most of yesterday in A&E due to some minor issues with her Type 1 diabetes. While she was there they did a routine pregnancy test which came back as positive. This leaves us in a position where we may prospectively become parents, until she has been to her GP etc so we know how far gone etc we have no idea what are options are.

This was in no way planned and she has been on the pill since day 1 so we have always been cautious etc as she has applied for uni to start in September and neither of us had planned on children until we we're around 25 (Currently 21 and 20)
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My girlfriend is Type 1 diabetic and from what I learnt when she was first diagnosed 18 months ago, I recall becoming pregnant will needs serious considerations in terms of her insulin injections etc and the control of her diet. So there is more for you both to think about there.

Best of luck to you both and I'm sure you will make the right decision.
 
The Craig said:
How long have you been going out?

Pesonally I'm 21 and a student graduating next year, but even on a ~26k starting salary I'd never dream of wanting kids with my gf of 1+year that early!
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It will be a year next month since we started seeing each other but a year in April since we've officially been together
 
Cmon guys, there is a time and a place for jokes.

Some of you need to put yourself in the OPs shoes for two seconds. You wouldn't find it funny.
 
With regards to uni, your girlfriend will be able to apply for various extra grants through student finance to help support her and a baby, if you include child benefit and maintenance loans it amounts to something like £8-9000 a year.

It really comes down to whether you both want to become so dependant on each other and make such a commitment.
 
Im nearly 30, and only now would i consider kids in the next couple years, i know i just wasn't mature enough to deal with it in the 29 years previous
 
maccapacca said:
You'll never 'afford' a child
You'll never be 'prepared' for a child
There is no 'right' time to have a child

You stuck it in you live with it, we have two kids and I couldn't imagine them not being around, it's great it's terrible it's exhausting it's fun.

It's life
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This is pretty much me.

I never really wanted kids. They scared me. I have two now. Both under 2 1/2. It's not easy but they are good fun. I love my boys. Kids change your whole life. Gone are the days I sat in my underwear from 7AM until 4AM gaming. I guess that's a good thing though right? :D

I'm 33 BTW... I actually had to work that out :(
 
ManLoveRulesOK said:
Can you not read, 2 tests have already been done at the hospital. We need to go to the GP to find out how far gone she is etc
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The GP won't tell you anything more than 'yes you are pregnant' or not. They'll just do another test.

The way to calculate it is:
What was the date her last period started? That's day 1.

That's what the GP will calculate, nothing else. They can't tell anything more.

Only when you have your 12 week scan they can accurately (read: more approximately) calculate how far you are in. Until then you assume day 1 to be the day her last period started.

A blood test will tell you for sure - just in case there is anything with her diabetes condition that affects the pregnancy test result, which I don't think so.
 
Falcon punch inappropriate?

Joking aside, OP, all you can do is make your own decisions and see them through. Discuss it between the two of you. Children are a huge commitment, and honestly neither of you want to take that on when you're not at all prepared for it. Bitter, resentful parents are not what a child needs.
 
ntg said:
The GP won't tell you anything more than 'yes you are pregnant' or not. They'll just do another test.

The way to calculate it is:
What was the date her last period started? That's day 1.

That's what the GP will calculate, nothing else. They can't tell anything more.

Only when you have your 12 week scan they can accurately (read: more approximately) calculate how far you are in. Until then you assume day 1 to be the day her last period started.

A blood test will tell you for sure - just in case there is anything with her diabetes condition that affects the pregnancy test result, which I don't think so.
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I would guess that either a) It's been less than a few weeks since her cycle or b) she takes the pill continuously and as such wouldn't have noticed anyway.

The diabetes things means that this needs some serious consideration :( FWIW, my son just turned 1 and he's amazing (although at times sleep depriving!).
 
I was in a similar position to you last January and here I am in February a year on with a 5 month old little boy. It's difficult, it will strain your relationship and finances but I wouldn't go back to my old life.
 
Just gotta have a discussion with your partner about what you realistically want from your future.

When I found out my partner was pregnant mid 2012 I couldn't believe it, I didn't plan to have kids until my late 20's. That said we decided together to continue witht he pregnancy and had our daughter on Friday the 1st of February. After only 6 days with her I know making the decision to abort would have been a huge mistake.

Good luck.
 
PvtJoker said:
Shame about the sprog, but just think of all the lovely benefits you can now receive.
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Firstly please go troll somewhere else. Thank you

ntg said:
The GP won't tell you anything more than 'yes you are pregnant' or not. They'll just do another test.

The way to calculate it is:
What was the date her last period started? That's day 1.

That's what the GP will calculate, nothing else. They can't tell anything more.

Only when you have your 12 week scan they can accurately (read: more approximately) calculate how far you are in. Until then you assume day 1 to be the day her last period started.

A blood test will tell you for sure - just in case there is anything with her diabetes condition that affects the pregnancy test result, which I don't think so.
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I 'think' its a bit more complicated than that due to being on the pill. She was however discharged from hospital around lunch and they have booked her in for a scan tomorrow morning so by lunchtime I shall know a little more and we can really start thinking about what we want from this.
 
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