School Bans "Lethal" Flapjack

Judgeneo · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:50

Tauren said:
triangular flapjacks? since when?

i can only ever recall them being oblongular in shape.

Name · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:51

This is such a joke.

valkynaz · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:52

Another bonkers story of health and safety gone mad.

Let's ban everything that can be thrown and inflict damage.

arc@css · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:52

Just bake large, circular flapjacks which could be used as shields. Problem solved.

chief barker · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:54

cHk4 said:
I remember making a ninja star in DT at school, threw it in to the ceiling, my friend looked up at it, looked down to me and said "That's cool." The star fell out of the ceiling and impaled my friends head, there was bloody everywhere, the lulz I had.

These were all the rage back in my school days (24 years ago).

isonomicjedi · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:55

arc@css said:
Just bake large, circular flapjacks which could be used as shields. Problem solved.

genius

eagle2508 · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:56

Fantastic, maybe our Police Force should start carrying them.... Double bonus... If not used by the end of a shift to take some scum bag out they have a nice snack at hand :-D

TheVoice · 25 Mar 2013 at 13:58

They edited this part out just after posting it:

BBC News has asked the local education authority what guidance it gives schools about shapes of foodstuffs and whether the school would be seeking to ban other triangular items, such as wedges of pizza.

It has yet to respond.

No1newts · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:00

isonomicjedi said:
I say impose Sharia law in school and chop all their hands off.

Try throwing a flapjack with your foot now, smart ass.

Lol

elmarko said:
I'd argue square flapjacks are more dangerous as they have an additional edge.

Round would be the best for the risk averse confectionery consumer.

It's sad but I was thinking the same

Firestar_3x · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:01

Azza said:
Pretty sure they'd be capable of throwing a square flapjack just as well as a triangular one. A square one could be more dangerous too!

A square flapjack has 4 points vs 3, i would consider it even more dangerous.

V4NT0M · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:02

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/u...ed-flapjacks-after-pupil-is-hurt-8548084.html

lolz

isonomicjedi · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:02

Student was obviously a bit lightweight given that he had the choice of throwing knives and forks instead.

Grandmaster Fap! · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:09

******* kidding me! Ban pens and pencils too? actually, close the school incase someone gets hurt.

Waaaaaaaa, babies *mad*

Azza · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:14

Firestar_3x said:
A square flapjack has 4 points vs 3, i would consider it even more dangerous.

Exactly. I once had a book thrown at my face, in fact it was a psalms book. School didn't ban books and psalms though did they!! :mad:

-BA- · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:18

Damn they got in such a Flap over this when really no one gives a Jack **** about it

isonomicjedi · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:18

I would be worried if my son was named Jack and had episodes of impersonating birds.

How would school react ?

estebanrey · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:20

The head of the NFA (National Flapjack Association) has just done a press conference on this, he said...

"The only thing that stops a bad guy with a flapjack, is a good guy with a flapjack"

atpbx · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:20

Some schools won't even let the kids have sports cap bottled water in case the runts use them as water pistols.

KaiserDJG · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:21

My flapjack were so greasy that holding one was like holding sand, you just had to drink it... this would solve the problem

TheVoice · 25 Mar 2013 at 14:21

Obviously the safest thing to do is turn school dinners into a nutritional paste and have staff assigned to spooning said paste into the mouths of the hungry children.