Converting in order to marry a Muslim girl.

thep02 · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:17

Theophany said:
Short answer for me is 'no,' there are too many reasons to list why.

^^ This.

MrMoonX · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:18

What do u have to do to convert?

robgmun · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:20

Lord_Kokain said:
I cant believe I also ended up making a relationship thread but its been bugging me for some time lately and I try to get as many opinions as possible.

Long story short, been dating this Ukrainian girl for about 4 years and we are thinking of marrying. She is a Muslim in a rather awkward way that she strictly follows some things but not others (I have certainly seen more religious lot in my life in Britain). On one hand, we have gone through a lot together and I have always anticipated other, more secular, things that may put a dent on the relationship (e.g. parents disliking it, losing interest etc). Nothing as such has happened(if anything,its been going great) which makes it feel as it might work exactly because its somehow unusual. On the other hand, this can also mean eventual disaster.

This is why I wanted to see if anyone else here (particularly a guy) has such experience or at least knows someone that converted to Islam in order to marry and whether this kind of marriage has a future.

I did this, biggest mistake of my life doing this for a girl about 10 years ago. If you do it, only do it if you truly want to actually become Muslim.

Freefaller · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:31

Whilst my liberal views are fairly commonly aired, I don't think it makes any sense to convert to a religion that you do not believe in - it just makes a mockery of the religion and so on. Even more so if you're a Christian or hold other religious beliefs towards which you hold fairly strongly, as much as love is an overpowering emotion, it should be a 2 - way street.

I personally wouldn't do it, but we don't know you, her, or your history together.

pitchfork · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:31

I would simply never get married, I'd spend my life with a person, but marriage is for suckers who want to dump £20k on buying jacobs creek for some middle aged wedding planning spinster.

If I had to convert to a different religion, for a logical purpose (although one does not spring to mind), then yes. But you can't forge a theist from atheist skin so my affiliation with the religion would be strictly ceremonial.

smelly_legend · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:42

If it makes you happy, I don't see why not.

zoomee · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:46

Lord_Kokain said:
I cant believe I also ended up making a relationship thread but its been bugging me for some time lately and I try to get as many opinions as possible.

Long story short, been dating this Ukrainian girl for about 4 years and we are thinking of marrying. She is a Muslim in a rather awkward way that she strictly follows some things but not others (I have certainly seen more religious lot in my life in Britain). On one hand, we have gone through a lot together and I have always anticipated other, more secular, things that may put a dent on the relationship (e.g. parents disliking it, losing interest etc). Nothing as such has happened(if anything,its been going great) which makes it feel as it might work exactly because its somehow unusual. On the other hand, this can also mean eventual disaster.

This is why I wanted to see if anyone else here (particularly a guy) has such experience or at least knows someone that converted to Islam in order to marry and whether this kind of marriage has a future.

Seen this many a time mate- being a muslim I can categorically tell you - you are converting / reverting for the wrong reason, and more than likely once the dust settles will go back to your old self.

Reverting to Islam is supposed to be something of your OWN choice - its not an easy one to make as it is considered VERY bad to then 'change your mind'. Do it for the right reasons - not just for a bird.

Remind her of this: - The prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said "The ONLY difference between a muslim and other religions is your 5 daily prayers". If she claims to be muslim - does she pray 5 times a day?...... I doubt it

leaskovski · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:46

Can't see what the problem is. You can always convert back to whatever if it goes wrong.

Freefaller · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:56

pitchfork said:
I would simply never get married, I'd spend my life with a person, but marriage is for suckers who want to dump £20k on buying jacobs creek for some middle aged wedding planning spinster.

If I had to convert to a different religion, for a logical purpose (although one does not spring to mind), then yes. But you can't forge a theist from atheist skin so my affiliation with the religion would be strictly ceremonial.

Wow you're a little bitter about marriage - every opportunity you get to bash marriage you don't half do it!

android guy · 17 Sep 2013 at 07:58

Malevolence said:
I believe it's five times a day, and when you couple that nonsense with the no bacon, no beer and no whisky rules it doesn't sound much like fun.

Muslims i know drink beer & whisky & smoke - I have always found the muslims to be more a case of, do as i tell you to do & I'll do as i like.

ince · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:14

Weak tell her to. Are you a man

scorza · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:14

I know someone who has converted to marry a Pakistani girl, still eats bacon, drinks alcohol etc - so does his wife and kids. His immediate in-laws aren't too bothered about it but he does "halal" the house every time his extended family comes down from the north i.e. stores all his wine with a neighbour, chucks any pork products in the fridge.

Personally I wouldn't betray my own religion and culture though.

Derek W · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:20

Ok so you're looking to follow a religion that you don't really beleive so you can be with a woman. Fair enough. But you said yourself in the op that she doesn't really follow it either seeing as she picks and chooses which parts to follow. That makes perfect sense.

Efour · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:21

Depends If she asked me to move to a Muslim country and live there and practice what they preach id run a mile. Unless i could live out my Homeland fantasy.
If i had to just to get married, i know 2 men that have converted to Catholicism to make the parents/church ceremony doable, i wouldn't have an issue at all.
Id revert back to my Godless, empty, self a few weeks after the heat is off.

zoomee · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:23

leaskovski said:
Can't see what the problem is. You can always convert back to whatever if it goes wrong.

Look up what the actual word Islam means....

Religion isn't a joke - The WHOLE point of Islam is that you submit COMPLETELY to your Lord, (not just for a chick) - one does it for one self.

It's simple in Islam - There is no compulsion to become a Muslim - your choice but if you do, you must submit completely - That's the whole point of the Shahada (Proclamation of Faith) - COMPLETE belief in God, his angels and his messengers.

If you want to pick and choose bits which you feel like - you are just inventing your own religion....

eatcustard · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:25

If you convert all the Jesus lovers will come and kill you.

Its true, I have seen it on the interwebs

MooMoo444 · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:25

I wouldn't give up many of lifes finer things (bacon!) and start worshipping a false god 5 times a day just to keep a wench happy.

Tell her to respect your own beliefs or go your seperate ways.

Make · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:27

I wouldn't ever submit to convert to anything because parents/space monster/holy ghost want you to.

You do stuff because you want to. If it means not having a christian or a muslim wedding, that's too bad, but at least you still have your integrity.

Or, if you wanna live your life to please others and their whacky beliefs.. go ahead. I wouldn't waste mine.

haz_pro · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:32

I would rather just stay as boyfriend and girlfriend rather than convert just to marry.

Cosimo · 17 Sep 2013 at 08:35

Take me as I am or leave it. I wouldn’t convert for the sake of a relationship, it’s only for those who have faith in their belief.