Moral Dilemma !

Combat squirrel · 2 Oct 2013 at 02:12

Hades said:
My advice above isn't borne of not wanting to get involved (I've most definitely got involved in issues in the past even to my own personal risk). No, it's borne of 44 years of life experience. I'm an old git now and my views have changed.

By all means stand up for principles but:

1) She probably knows and has her eyes closed.
2) He won't care.
3) I bet both of them have been in similar relationships before.

By all means take some action but that action should, in my opinion, be to have a quiet discussion with her. Blasting out to the Facebook world can't achieve anything but the wrong result imho.

Thanks for some actual advice here, most of OCUK mock advice threads.

I will take your 44 years of experience, and as I Have said already, I have basically decided not to get involved but let him know that I don't condone what he is doing.

I think that is reasonable-ish, a good middle ground between doing nothing and going to blurt it out, at the least I hope it makes him think a bit.

Zefan · 2 Oct 2013 at 02:13

What a fence sitting non-decision this is.

Do you want to tell this story to your Grandchildren? Wouldn't you prefer to say about how you went and pillaged some sweet hunnies with your bro, or alternatively dropped him right in it by snitching to his girlfriend? Think about how "I didn't actually do anything meaningful, I just tutted very loudly and told him he was a very naughty boy" sounds. Is that how you want to inspire future generations?

:Edit: Also consider the fact that from two friends you are now making two enemies. Your bro now thinks you're a ****, and if she ever finds out about it all and realises you didn't say anything to her, she'll think you're a ****. Grabbing the bull by the horns and siding with one or the other is the only ~~interesting~~ sensible way to go here.

Stretch · 2 Oct 2013 at 02:15

[FnG]magnolia;25040452 said:
How long have you wanted to have sex with the woman for?

spoffle · 2 Oct 2013 at 02:27

Combat squirrel said:
Says your in Auckland, must be the blood going to your head haha

Combat squirrel said:
Says your in Auckland

Combat squirrel said:
Says your in

Combat squirrel said:
your in

Combat squirrel · 2 Oct 2013 at 02:27

Zefan said:
What a fence sitting non-decision this is.

Do you want to tell this story to your Grandchildren? Wouldn't you prefer to say about how you went and pillaged some sweet hunnies with your bro, or alternatively dropped him right in it by snitching to his girlfriend? Think about how "I didn't actually do anything meaningful, I just tutted very loudly and told him he was a very naughty boy" sounds. Is that how you want to inspire future generations?

:Edit: Also consider the fact that from two friends you are now making two enemies. Your bro now thinks you're a ****, and if she ever finds out about it all and realises you didn't say anything to her, she'll think you're a ****. Grabbing the bull by the horns and siding with one or the other is the only ~~interesting~~ sensible way to go here.

Zefan · 2 Oct 2013 at 02:34

Theophany · 2 Oct 2013 at 06:11

Hades said:
My advice above isn't borne of not wanting to get involved (I've most definitely got involved in issues in the past even to my own personal risk). No, it's borne of 44 years of life experience. I'm an old git now and my views have changed.

By all means stand up for principles but:

1) She probably knows and has her eyes closed.
2) He won't care.
3) I bet both of them have been in similar relationships before.

By all means take some action but that action should, in my opinion, be to have a quiet discussion with her. Blasting out to the Facebook world can't achieve anything but the wrong result imho.

The best advice in this thread came from a drunk. This is why GD is a magical place.

wordy · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:01

Combat squirrel said:
/

You know how everyone hates those people who have public slanging matches of facebook (I do and I'm not even on facebook)? Well that's exactly what your doing. Personally I would've either ignored him or told him not to contact you if you dislike him so much.

413x · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:07

Now you are in!

You do risk losing two friends over this
Tbh I wouldn't know what to do

If they are just acquaintances I'd ignore

Vanquish-Storm · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:09

Combat squirrel said:
00:41
Snake man:
Alright mate are you doing the photography at **the club** tonight?

Snake?

Theophany · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:10

wordy said:
You know how everyone hates those people who have public slanging matches of facebook (I do and I'm not even on facebook)? Well that's exactly what your doing. Personally I would've either ignored him or told him not to contact you if you dislike him so much.

It's a 2-step process:

Step 1: Stand.
Step 2: Bang.

Rinse and repeat.

i5aces · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:18

God I love GD, never fails to put a smile on my face

glenimp617 · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:26

I fail to understand how this has anything to do with you?

You need to keep your pesky little nose out to be honest. If someone started involving themselves in my private life I think I'd be looking for them in a club to be honest.

You should look in the mirror. Talk about pot calling the kettle.
You have three photos of him kissing other women? why would you take photos? are you are private investigator? you've said you hardly know the other woman. Sounds like a jealousy thing to me.

Welcome to the real world mate! most people cheat, but nobody ever finds out about it so assumes it's not as common as it is

I don't think he's the snake!

i5aces · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:32

Combat squirrel said:
00:41
Snake man:
Alright mate are you doing the photography at **the club** tonight?

01:06
Combat Squirrel:
Yeah and I know what ur going say, my advice to you would be to stop cheating on ur mrs u cheating ****, now don't talk to me again.

I think this is the reason he has the photo's *snake* knows he has them and is worried what the op is going to do with them. :rolleyes:

nick.lidgett · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:45

Combat squirrel said:
Answer: NEVER - I'm with the woman I want to marry Not any woman on Earth will do for me other than my gf I am happy to say, took many years to find her but I am super happy now

Pics of both women, we will be the judge of this :eek:

MrRoper · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:49

glen8 said:
I fail to understand how this has anything to do with you?

You need to keep your pesky little nose out to be honest. If someone started involving themselves in my private life I think I'd be looking for them in a club to be honest.

You should look in the mirror. Talk about pot calling the kettle.
You have three photos of him kissing other women? why would you take photos? are you are private investigator? you've said you hardly know the other woman. Sounds like a jealousy thing to me.

Welcome to the real world mate! most people cheat, but nobody ever finds out about it so assumes it's not as common as it is

I don't think he's the snake!

Did you actually read what he wrote? To me it sounds like he is an photographer for a club, why should he restrict who he takes photo`s of just because they are scum?

And most people cheat? hmm, not so sure about that. Most people with no self respect or respect of others do..

AmyS · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:49

Keep out of it, to be honest.

I know from personal experience the ''shoot the messenger'' scenario is all too true.

And why HAVE you taken photographs of him with other women? Does seem a little bizarre if she is just an acquaintance.

Hank_Marvin · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:52

So you dont want to tell his gf but you took multiple photos of him for your own collection?

dirtychinchilla · 2 Oct 2013 at 09:56

glen8 said:
I fail to understand how this has anything to do with you?

You need to keep your pesky little nose out to be honest. If someone started involving themselves in my private life I think I'd be looking for them in a club to be honest.

You should look in the mirror. Talk about pot calling the kettle.
You have three photos of him kissing other women? why would you take photos? are you are private investigator? you've said you hardly know the other woman. Sounds like a jealousy thing to me.

Welcome to the real world mate! most people cheat, but nobody ever finds out about it so assumes it's not as common as it is

I don't think he's the snake!

Just no.

This girl is his friend, he has a responsibility to her and evidently cares for her. I would tell her, personally.

Theophany · 2 Oct 2013 at 10:07

dirtychinchilla said:
This girl is his friend, he has a responsibility to her and evidently cares for her. I would tell her, personally.

No she isn't and no he doesn't. :/

Combat squirrel said:
IN SHORT:

I know a couple, i'm not mates with them but acquaintances. The female is pretty good mates with a good friend of mine but I don't know her that well but I know she is a lovely person.

Why go out of your way to create problems for yourself when you have no reason to do so beyond being a busybody? I know it sounds harsh, but we all have our own crap to deal with, why would anybody want to take on something as acrimonious as other people's relationship problems when they have no direct impact on your life?