Girlfriend is religious, I'm atheist.. Can this work?

Stuff · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:15

estebanrey said:
Ask her if her God came to her, in any way she perceives him/her/it and told her to kill her child would she do so.

If she says "no" then tell her she is on some level an atheist too, if she says "yes" then run out of there as fast your legs will carry you and count your blessings (before ringing social services of course).

I don't like doing things like that though... It doesn't seem fair

Biohazard · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:16

Here's an idea.

'Convert'. Then when baby's born renounce the heathen swines.

Pay child support for 18 years.

Win.

RDM · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:17

Stuff said:
I don't like doing things like that though... It doesn't seem fair

Have you been having protected sex for the last two years? If so then you are already breaking two of the tenants of her faith on a regular basis.

estebanrey · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:18

Stuff said:
I don't like doing things like that though... It doesn't seem fair

Why? Her God asked the same thing of Abraham did he not?

The__Malteser · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:18

estebanrey said:
Ask her if her God came to her, in any way she perceives him/her/it and told her to kill her child would she do so.

If she says "no" then tell her she is on some level an atheist too, if she says "yes" then run out of there as fast your legs will carry you and count your blessings (before ringing social services of course).

What an ignorant post. You complain that she is pushing her faith on the OP. But you feel you should push your belief on the OP/his gf.

I don't think mainstream Christian morals are necessarily a bad thing to raise a child by (obviously the anti gay bigotry needs to be dropped and largely is now by lots of Christians, strict no sex before marriage is also pointlessly silly for most people) but in general its not too bad. Labeling a child as belonging to some religion is a bit off though - would be better if you were happy to explain that mum is a Catholic, Dad doesn't believe, introduce the kid to religion and let him/her make their own mind up when they're older - a baptism probably wouldn't do any harm and would perhaps pacify her family at least but maybe agree to give the child a completely free choice regarding confirmation etc... (you never know - he/she might even opt to go through it just for show/to keep the grandparents happy)

The reality is that as we continue to advance technologically we'll probably see more and more people shaking off these beliefs... but we'll likely also see a lot of people going through the motions to keep family members happy.

I agree with this.

Stuff · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:19

RDM said:
Have you been having protected sex for the last two years? If so then you are already breaking two of the tenants of her faith on a regular basis.

We sin in this way and others (drink alcohol, etc) on a fairly regular basis. This is another of my points! Surely you cant just pick and choose which and when the 'rules' apply?! :confused:

Stuff · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:20

estebanrey said:
Why? Her God asked the same thing of Abraham did he not?

I'm not familiar.. Link?

Biohazard · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:21

Stuff said:
We sin in this way and others (drink alcohol, etc) on a fairly regular basis. This is another of my points! Surely you cant just pick and choose which and when the 'rules' apply?!

She obviously is.

Why are you asking us rhetorical questions that you should be asking her?

We aren't going to change her mind.

estebanrey · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:21

The__Malteser said:
What an ignorant post.

Ignorant of what?

Has God asked humans to sacrifice their own children before?
Yes (Abraham).

So please don't come back with "it's a stupid question because he'd never demand that"

estebanrey · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:22

Stuff said:
I'm not familiar.. Link?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Binding_of_Isaac

Stuff · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:23

Biohazard said:
She obviously is.

Why are you asking us rhetorical questions that you should be asking her?

We aren't going to change her mind.

I was hoping someone can provide a counter-argument that I can understand..

^TANK^ · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:23

Test her faith by slapping her with a huge salami around the face repeatedly until she falls to her knees and then ask her why her God doesn't love her enough to prevent such actions.

Seriously though if you plan to have children it is best not to procreate with a gullible fantasist.

jahujames · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:23

Could be a deal breaker. Not is...

Like everybody else has stated, your best option is to discuss it with your partner and lay all your cards out on the table. Discuss how you see your child being raised and if you mind/don't mind religion being a part of it's life. Maybe she could concede you, at an older age, telling the child why you don't believe... and what your thoughts are regarding the universe and our origins.

Who knows, that option could work? But you really do need to find out if this relationship has a future, if you want one with her, with regards to kids... otherwise it's nothing more than a waste of time, in my opinion.

Biohazard · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:24

Stuff said:
I was hoping someone can provide a counter-argument that I can understand..

I believe when I choose to believe, as it suits.

It would appear to be. But again, we aren't going to make sense of her for you if you can't do that yourself.

Good luck!

BigglesPiP · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:27

I know an atheist who's wife is religious, they have 2 children and as far as I can see, all is fine as they're both sensible.

Though if she is adamant that you need to become religious too then that's probably not sensible.

Pudney · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:27

Stuff said:
I was hoping someone can provide a counter-argument that I can understand..

There isn't a counter argument, this isn't an intellectual debate. You have a fundamental disagreement to how to raise a child, and you've said it's a deal breaker for her. If that's true then you have to decide if you're happy with that unless her viewpoint isn't as concrete as indicated.

The__Malteser · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:31

estebanrey said:
Ignorant of what?

Has God asked humans to sacrifice their own children before?
Yes (Abraham).

So please don't come back with "it's a stupid question because he'd never demand that"

Oh my god. Oh my god. What am I reading?! WHAT THE HELL AM I READING?!?!?!

I'll just answer you with this.

I'm assuming you don't believe in the bible. But you seem to believe in the 'negative' things there are in the bible.

Parables. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parable

Stuff said:
I was hoping someone can provide a counter-argument that I can understand..

Its simple. She believes in something. I believe in capitalism (for example, I don't give 2 ****s). Why? Because I do.

You need to see if what she thinks is REALLY her thought, or just forced onto her by her parents. If she sins in the ways you mentioned, she ain't really a full catholic, but who is? (Then again, they seem to be allowing contraceptives generally, just like the gay thing.) You also have to see if she REALLY believes or if she just goes to church (or what she does :confused:

) out of habit/parent preassure. If that if its habit it will wear off, and she may give in easier. If she really believes, it might be harder.

^TANK^ said:
Test her faith by slapping her with a huge salami around the face repeatedly until she falls to her knees and then ask her why her God doesn't love her enough to prevent such actions.

WHAT?! WHAT?! People actually believe this stuff?!

kageyyy · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:33

It'll work fine until you disagree on how to raise your children should you have any, then it will break down.

Speaking from how things worked out for my Muslim and Non-Believer friends.

estebanrey · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:34

The__Malteser said:
Oh my god. Oh my god. What am I reading?! WHAT THE HELL AM I READING?!?!?!

I'll just answer you with this.

I'm assuming you don't believe in the bible. But you seem to believe in the 'negative' things there are in the bible.

Parables. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parable

Oh the old "if I agree with it, the Bible is literally true but if I don't then it's a metaphor" argument.

Did God ask Abraham to sacrifice his own son, yes or no?

Salsa · 16 Dec 2013 at 22:37

The__Malteser said:
What an ignorant post.

Estebanrey and ignorance generally go together in these sort of threads.

OP I would suggest that this is not a great place to get a balanced opinion on this subject. For what its worth I think if the kid is brought up with choices then thats a good thing and would give a balanced upbringing.

Whether you or your mrs can come to an agreement on how or if that will work, only you two can decide.

/Salsa