Most embarassing thing you have ever done?

Two moment stick in my mind:

1) Walking along and managed to walk into a lamp post whilst ogling an attractive girl across the road (and yes, she saw me) :o

2) Stood on a huge dog turd in the middle of a busy town and skidded along waving my arms desperately trying to keep my balance :o
 
I was on a family holiday in ibiza back when I was around 14 and me and my sister (2 years younger than me) went on a peddle boat thing in the sea. We set off round the cove on what seamed to be a very nice calm sea, but got caught in a current and ended up getting washed up about 30 mins later on a german nudist beach. Needless to say, the "tourists" helped us back into the water, 3 of them infact, fishing tackle and everything.

Never peddled so fast in my life to get back to my family! To top it off, when I jumped out of the boat thing when we got back to our beach, I stood on a needle-spined sea anemone, putting it right through my right foot. The pain of that wasn't anywhere near as bad as the shame experienced moments earlier.
 
Took an acid when I was 16 and it all went a bit mad. Ended up trying to hoover my bedsheets whist naked convinced I had ants on my bed. The look on my mothers face when she came in to find out why I had the hoover on at 2am. Never has been spoken of again to this very day.
 
True story here. I wanted to die I was that embarrassed and shocked at the same time.

We took the kids to Matlock park a few months ago and was playing football, a good 100 people around us doing similar things. Noticed a police officer walking towards us and decided to play a joke on Lewis (my boy).

Me: "officer this is the man you are looking for" *i point at Lewis and wink to the office*

The office then does a slow jog over and puts his hands on lewises shoulders and starts asking all these questions, "what's your name" "how old are you" "do you know these people".

Lewis then starts looking worried and scared. I step in, "whoa, we're only messing about here" *moves Lewis away from the officer*

The officer then turns at me and shouts at the top of his voice "So you think it is ******* funny that a kid is missing? Playing jokes like this you ******* idiot. I should arrest you wasting police time" goes on to call me more names.... I am completely speechless, not knowing what the hell was going off, about 100 people looking my way.

Turns out that a 7 year old blonde boy had just gone missing. (Lewis being 8 years old and blonde)

Felt like a right plonker, I'll not play that trick ever again. Few people around me come over after to let me know what they thought of the officer and the way he went off at me, which was a bit of a relief. Didn't want people actually thinking I would make such a joke.
 
On my first job I was given the rather menial task of cleaning some glue up from a factory floor along with another lad who was classed as "special needs".

There was a lorry drivers strike on and production in the factory was at a standstill.

Anyway, a couple of hours later I decided I needed a rest from the allotted task and gave all the tools I had been using to the other lad. In the distance I spotted the foreman approaching on a forklift truck only hear when he was nearly on top of us a loud crash. I turned round to see that he and the forklift truck had fallen in to the hole we had accidently dug in the middle of the factory floor. The glue was transparent and neither of us could tell the difference between that and the factory floor. Luckily for me, I had given the pick we had used to the special needs lad who couldn't explain himself to take the blame. He had to come back the next day to fill the hole in lol.
 
Rybo89 said:
True story here. I wanted to die I was that embarrassed and shocked at the same time.

We took the kids to Matlock park a few months ago and was playing football, a good 100 people around us doing similar things. Noticed a police officer walking towards us and decided to play a joke on Lewis (my boy).

Me: "officer this is the man you are looking for" *i point at Lewis and wink to the office*

The office then does a slow jog over and puts his hands on lewises shoulders and starts asking all these questions, "what's your name" "how old are you" "do you know these people".

Lewis then starts looking worried and scared. I step in, "whoa, we're only messing about here" *moves Lewis away from the officer*

The officer then turns at me and shouts at the top of his voice "So you think it is ******* funny that a kid is missing? Playing jokes like this you ******* idiot. I should arrest you wasting police time" goes on to call me more names.... I am completely speechless, not knowing what the hell was going off, about 100 people looking my way.

Turns out that a 7 year old blonde boy had just gone missing. (Lewis being 8 years old and blonde)

Felt like a right plonker, I'll not play that trick ever again. Few people around me come over after to let me know what they thought of the officer and the way he went off at me, which was a bit of a relief. Didn't want people actually thinking I would make such a joke.
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You could have reported him for that.
 
A few years back, I went out on a date with an old school Girlfriend. We were now in our mid thirties. We had a good time, went for a few drinks etc.. good time was had by all. The night was looking promising.

She invites me to her place, as I'm too drunk to drive. I get led into a bedroom and she goes out I assume to freshen up.

So I'm like, 'here we go Baron, we are in you lucky dog'
I'm stripped naked, when I hear a shreek, I spin round at half mast..

.. to be confronted by my old school friend, and her 6 year old daughter...

She screams at me, 'what are you doing?'
I answer...'erm, erm..I sleep naked?'

We never, met up again after that.
 
Not that embarrassing but not having had much sleep for the last couple of nights and getting called into work 3 hours early today at one point I was totally tuned out to suddenly became conscious of the fact I appeared to be staring at the breasts of a women (no idea who she was - probably a client) who had stopped to talk to a colleague and was now looking at me in mild amusement. (She was atleast attractive).
 
Rroff said:
Not that embarrassing but not having had much sleep for the last couple of nights and getting called into work 3 hours early today at one point I was totally tuned out suddenly became conscious of the fact I appeared to be staring at the breasts of a women (no idea who she was - probably a client) who had stopped to talk to a colleague and was now looking at me in mild amusement.
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:D :D
 
Salsa said:
It takes my whisky addled brain a second or two to process two things. One, my kilt has become inverted and is now covering my chest and two, granny appears to have KO'd herself in the fall and is now lying face down on my junk, her nose nestled gently between my plums. :eek:
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:D

Cracked me up! :)
 
i was 21 at the time, it was Haloween a Friday night I do believe,

went out and got slaughtered it was a fairly wild night my t-shirt got ripped off my shorts were in shreds, I wake up the next day on a sofa at a friend of a friends (both girls)

I then needed to get to my car the following day, however my shorts now resembled a hanky that was about all that was left, so 10am on a Saturday morning in busy Nottingham I had to walk down what are known as the busiest streets in Nottingham in just my undercrackers and a pair of trainers to my car, It was about a 15-20 minute walk

that was the most horrifying day of my life

I have a hilarious/grim story that happened in my presence but luckily not to me
 
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Called my English teacher "Mum" in front of a whole class of people. In high school. In my final year. :rolleyes:

In my defense I was very tired. :p

Also, having the Police tap the window of my car with a breaker bar in the middle of the night, while at the side of a quiet road, getting it on with a female friend in the back seat, both completely naked, and then being told to wind the window down or he'll bust it in, at the same time shining a torch through... That was a little embarrassing.
 
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I was drunk to hell at a friends wedding quite a few years ago, I decided it would be hilarious to streak through the lobby of this upmarket hotel "They'll find it funny" I thought.

So, you know, I got my kit off, started running through the lobby which was full of wedding guests. At this point you're probably thinking "That's pretty bad"

Worse still I slipped on the polished floor without my shoes on and decked it so hard I knocked myself unconscious, woke up with a crowd of people around me.

Regretted that one in the morning.
 
Oh I forgot about this one:

Back when I was at boarding school my friend's dad was out with his gf for the weekend so we had a free house. Naturally we got a few friends over and got drunk. As a particularly enthusiastic drinker, I needed to go to bed fairly early in the night, but struggled to my feet and was welcomed back to the party with cries of "2nd wind!". It wasn't long before I became indisposed again and went for another power nap. An hour or two later, determined to carry on, I staggered out of the bedroom and down the stairs.

Bouyed by my previous reception I jumped down the stairs absolutely ****faced shouting "HE'S GOT A 3RD WIND!" only to be met by my friends sitting around the kitchen table drinking tea with Mal's dad and his gf discussing current news and politics quietly. I sheepishly sat down and tried my best to pretend I wasn't completely ****ed, but I felt I may have blown my cover.
 
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