A friend, religion, and what to do?

matt_fsr · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:10

Genuine question here, so I'd prefer less of the daft GD replies than usual please.

I've a good friend, who has recently 'discovered' religion it seems. He's started doing the regular Church attending thing, and going to Church groups, and I was at his place for the first time recently, and saw a Bible laying about - so it does seem to be genuine.

Only problem is, I'm pretty strongly Atheist - and have little or no time for organised religion. I don't seek to actively 'bash' religion, I just think it's all a lie contrived to keep the powerful, powerful and the poor/weak in their place.

Luckily, he's the kind of guy who wouldn't push his views on me, so it's unlikely to come to any kind of direct conflict - at least as far as things are at the moment, but that could change depending on if or how he changes. (Will leave that one for the time being)

Trouble is, with me feeling strongly against religion, I'm feeling like I should try and get him out of this situation - but is that being selfish? I have a feeling that maybe in a few years, or 5, or 10, whatever... he may turn round and say "why didn't you tell me it was all BS?" - then I'd feel terrible for not having spoken up before.

Is that just me being selfish though? Am I best off just leaving him to it, as it's his own life and choices?

(Borderline SC topic I know, but SC is too quiet these days)

eatcustard · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:11

Leave him to his sky pixies

Bunka · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:13

matt_fsr said:
Am I best off just leaving him to it, as it's his own life and choices?

Nailed it.

dirtychinchilla · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:13

Yeah man, absolutely try and talk him round! I'm sure there will be a lot of posts saying leave him to it, but I'd really struggle to stay friends with someone who held such illogical views, and I'd consider his judgement on many things seriously compromised.

This will seriously effect his life, and particularly if you feel he's being duped, you shouldn't let that slide.

No doubt it'll be difficult,t hoguh.

wilber · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:15

If he is aware of your strong atheist views and respects them, then maybe you should do the same?

teenwolf · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:15

only 3 options here i see.

1: burn him on a stake.
2: poop through his letterbox and befriend him.
3: poop through your own letterbox for interfering in his life.

Smokey Deza · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:16

My mate did this. Went down with a mate to a church and was instantly converted. Every time I saw him thereafter, he'd start waffling on about fate, destiny, and all kinds of other nonsense.

As said, I left him to his sky pixies.

ScarySquirrel · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:16

How would you feel if he tried to talk you out of being an Atheist?

Tosno · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:17

dirtychinchilla said:
This will seriously effect his life

Yes it will. For the better.

dirtychinchilla · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:17

ScarySquirrel said:
How would you feel if he tried to talk you out of being an Atheist?

You debate.

Tosno said:
Yes it will. For the better.

What, to be sucked into what is arguably archaic and useless information? What's really great is having a strong foundation of friends and family, not an old book and the fogeys at the church.

dottty27 · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:20

You are willing to lose a friend because he found god * a finding he has not pushed on you at all as it stand's * ...

dirtychinchilla · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:22

dottty27 said:
You are willing to lose a friend because he found god * a finding he has not pushed on you at all as it stand's * ...

From the OP it's definitely not about whether the guy is pushy or not. He's questioning his friend's ability to think.

Ayahuasca · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:22

Time for him to watch some Richard Dawkins.

currob · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:22

Tie him to a chair and throw him in a river, if he sinks he's...oh wait...

Tosno · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:22

dirtychinchilla said:
What, to be sucked into what is arguably archaic and useless information? What's really great is having a strong foundation of friends and family, not an old book and the fogeys at the church.

Indeed arguably.

Sharlaw · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:23

Your friend's beliefs are nothing to do with you. If he is your friends you'll respect his choices. Just as he respects yours enough to not interfere with your beliefs (or lack of).

cheesyboy · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:23

I would probably be concerned. Mostly because it seems odd behaviour to suddenly decide to invest in religion in such a way - what has prompted this? Is he suffering from some significant life stresses or perhaps mental health issues?

The religion is probably a symptom of something - as a friend, you should probably focus your efforts on finding out what that is and how you can help, rather than being distracted by the rights and wrongs of his new found spirituality.

dirtychinchilla · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:24

Sharlaw said:
Your friend's beliefs are nothing to do with you. If he is your friends you'll respect his choices. Just as he respects yours enough to not interfere with your beliefs (or lack of).

I strongly doubt everyone would be saying the same thing if he had become a Muslim.

Greebo · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:25

It will get worse. I had a mate who did this. Our conservations started to get more and more about religion.

The final straw was one evening when I was round at his and some of his new friends came round and one of them had a guitar and they started singing "god is great, god is good, god is beautiful" and wanted me to join in.

Twirlywoos · 25 Aug 2015 at 16:25

matt_fsr said:
Genuine question here, so I'd prefer less of the daft GD replies than usual please.

I've a good friend, who has recently 'discovered' religion it seems. He's started doing the regular Church attending thing, and going to Church groups, and I was at his place for the first time recently, and saw a Bible laying about - so it does seem to be genuine.

Only problem is, I'm pretty strongly Atheist - and have little or no time for organised religion. I don't seek to actively 'bash' religion, I just think it's all a lie contrived to keep the powerful, powerful and the poor/weak in their place.

Luckily, he's the kind of guy who wouldn't push his views on me, so it's unlikely to come to any kind of direct conflict - at least as far as things are at the moment, but that could change depending on if or how he changes. (Will leave that one for the time being)

Trouble is, with me feeling strongly against religion, I'm feeling like I should try and get him out of this situation - but is that being selfish? I have a feeling that maybe in a few years, or 5, or 10, whatever... he may turn round and say "why didn't you tell me it was all BS?" - then I'd feel terrible for not having spoken up before.

Is that just me being selfish though? Am I best off just leaving him to it, as it's his own life and choices?

(Borderline SC topic I know, but SC is too quiet these days)

You sound like a hypocrite he is better of without a "friend" like you. Just because he has chosen a religion doesn't make him any less of a person that he was before. I have many friends from different cultures, religions and whilst I don't agree with their philosophy in life I wouldn't cut ties with them because of it. However each person has a different personality so if he changes and starts drifting away then let him be.

As for religion keeping poor in their place, lol pull the other one. Religion teaches equality and you can continue to be shackled down into a financial choke hold that your beliefs have burdened upon you.