Bit of Life Advice needed

As above it seems like you have things set for yourself. Take part in a sport to keep your mind off work. Good luck
 
I'm a similar age to you and had been in a long isolating and ultimately unhappy relationship, I met someone who I got on amazingly with but it just turns out that as a couple we are not right for each other and are now just very good friends.

It all kind of left me in a similar "nothing's going right" situation, but over the last few months I've realised I'm a young bloke with a good job and a house... Same as you, and I'm also a bit of a worrier, I want a family and kids etc... But trust me just try and be a bit more social and stop caring and you'll start meeting people. There are some proper nutters out there but there are loads of nice people too, but you have to be meeting them to find out and dating sites are ideal for that, over the last few months I've probably dated 30ish women and have now met someone who seems great but is early days.

From what you've put in the op you are a young, hard working home owner with his head screwed on, trust me ******* love that **** :D. As for your work being a bit **** and stressful yeah that sucks but you're not going to lose it (a worry with getting mortgage I know) and if it's paying well just try and suck it up... If not delegate! Probably terrible advice but IMO you're too young to be worrying about I women mate.
 
helpimcrap said:
To the OP - basically she was using you to get her ex back by making him jealous. I had it the other month by unexpectedly going out with someone and we had a great time then a few days later we couldn't meet because she had got back with her ex.....
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Lol! No wonder they have internet clinics in America. Can see this happening here.

 
OP I've been there I really have, in so many ways you are fortunate, you have good friends and a good family who sound like they've been a terrific support through a difficult time.

If you're not totally over your ex and have a lot of other stuff on your plate, take a step back from the dating game, particularly online. It's a minefield full of stark raving loons. Believe me I've been through enough of them, just search my fogbeast thread lol.

Who knows what's going on with this girl you went on a date with but look at it a different way, there are other girls out there you will connect with just she wasn't really for you. It may sound crude but get out and do some pasty smashing and watch out for red flags.

Of all people I genuinely thought I'd never find someone that I would happily get into a relationship with again, I was set on giving up and now have met a woman who makes me feel truly happy. Which as someone who suffers with depression is no small thing!

Good luck mate and just try to enjoy the good things you have, easier said than done but try.
 
Thanks for all the replys, its good to know that people have been in similar positions.

I know im lucky with my family and job so maybe i do need to take a step back and take that in

With the dating, i wasnt going to meet anyone until the move goes through and im settled but she seemed quite cool so i thought why not. Its only that the date we so well, felt like we had known each other for ever, she was super keen, started the kiss, wanted to see me again and everything that i was quite up for it and then 2 days later i get that. I'm just a bit like wft seriously?! But yes it was only 1 date and there are plenty more people out there i know.
 
Dude women are for the most part utterly bat **** bonkers, just in varying degrees and I've come across this occurence girls seeming keen and then doing a fast fade. It's head wrecking but again try to reframe the issue, she's obviously silly and doesn't really know what she wants so you're better of without someone like that.
 
elh_2009 said:
It just seems to be one thing after another and I’m beginning to feel quite miserable. I’ve spoke to a couple of my friends and they seem to think I just need to pull my socks up and get on with it but it’s hard when you feel that nothing is going your way.
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Sounds like you're softer than your friends. I don't mean that as an insult.

It could be that you're a very sensitive soul, that they're hard-hearted, or a bit of both. In any event, it's a shame they can't make more of an effort to be sounding boards and support you more.

Why not try throwing yourself in to a new hobby or interest, and stop or at least reduce your efforts to find a replacement woman for the time being?
 
Vidar said:
Dude women are for the most part utterly bat **** bonkers, just in varying degrees and I've come across this occurence girls seeming keen and then doing a fast fade. It's head wrecking but again try to reframe the issue, she's obviously silly and doesn't really know what she wants so you're better of without someone like that.
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That's why idealy you should have multiple women on the go (dating). That way you become the chooser and if one decides to get back with her ex it's no big deal - you got a couple more waiting.

Worst thing is to put all your efforts into one women thinking you will end up marrying her because she is so cool and pretty - then she jumps to another bloke and you take a heavy hit. It's like spending all your time polishing a car that ends up being rammed by a Tesco truck.
 
But now she’s told me that someone she was seeing from a few months ago has got back in touch and she’s now all confused. I’ve basically said go deal with that and we’ll leave it. As much as we got on I’m not gonna be messed about, I’ve had enough of that in my lifetime. It’s a shame because I was actually really feeling it with her.
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You should have said he's likely doing the exact same thing she is to you...
then asked if she really wants to be messed about by someone like that :p
 
arknor said:
You should have said he's likely doing the exact same thing she is to you...
then asked if she really wants to be messed about by someone like that :p
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haha i actaully said something like shes mental to even consider going back to someone who messed her about but do what you have to do
 
Dr House said:
If you have trouble with girls read some PUA / self improvement stuff, don't take it as gospel but some of the tips can really help up your game.

www.reddit.com/r/seduction
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I know you've added a caveat there and I've edited out your good advice but the above piece should be avoided. PUA and self-improvement are not interchangeable words and are probably the absolute opposite in meaning. I also get very fidgety whenever anyone references reddit in general and r/seduction in particular but that's probably for another thread.
 
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