Longest you've been in hospital as a patient

8 weeks straight ( though 2 weeks of that i was sedated - so they went pretty fast !! )

First newspaper i saw after i came round had pictures of the Twin Towers collapsing - Thought the world had gone to war in my absence :p

Huge thanks to Weston General Hospital and anyone that works for the NHS.

Despite being a miserable patient, i was looked after like a champ.
 
I don't know about other people but the worst thing for me was having to listen to the inane drivel spewing out of other people's mouths and not being able to escape. :p
 
Freefaller said:
I do feel for you guys that have spent extensive time in hospital :( Hope you're all better now :)
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I have some fond memories of my time in Hospital :

Not realising that the support socks ( to stop fluid retention around the ankles ) are actually very slippery if you havent used your legs for 2 weeks - Was too stubborn to use a bed pan and had the great idea to walk to the toilet.
The last thing i remember was grabbing the side of the bed whilst almost horizontal, then Bang, out cold.

The old guy in our ward that had the nurses panicking as he lit up a cigarette, despite having oxygen cylinders right next to him.

The 'sunday night curry club'. 4 guys in ICU who had curries brought in by one of their wives on a sunday evening. Hospital food wasn't bad, but you would have killed for a decent curry after a few weeks.

The look on the nurses face when she caught me eating Marmite from a jar. I had lied to my Mum ( unforgivable,i know ) and told her that is was OK. Apparently salt and a recovering liver are not advised
 
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2 days being pumped full of antibiotics every 4 hours after being bitten by a stray cat and my hand/wrist swelling up to twice its size and the infection starting to spread all the way up my arm. After the first 12 hours of staring at the wall I was beginning to wish I'd just chopped it off myself! I didn't get any sleep for the 2 nights I was in there either!
 
A few months. And then back in for more ops. And then day trips !

I got run over by a Quarry dumper which crushed my left hand squidging my left thumb off at the fatty bit of your palm.

Many days in the Hyperbarics. Just as your healing back for an elastoplasty op and start the whole healing process again.

But I learnt what "Midnight Admissions" are and Friday night is Fish & Chip night !
 
My longest stay was when I had minor surgery on my leg, think I was there for about 1h30mins :p

I've visited people in hospital for longer than that.
 
2 weeks for a collapsed lung. Most of that was spent with a tube sticking out of my side attached to a bucket with fluid in that i had to carry around trying to reinflate it, that didn't work so i had surgery to 'glue' the lung back up to the wall. 3 days later i was home. The tube and bucket thing was surprisingly more of an annoyance than anything else.

Nurses are awesome, not a job i could do.
 
Nurses are angels. I've had about 5 different ones the past 3 days and they've all been superb. Had an old boy moved next to me that's just been through some surgery called a TURP from what I can tell. He's been stage 4 prostate cancer for 11 years. Anyway, she was putting in a catheter and changing something or another (don't wanna know!) and she's as bright and breezy as can be on a Saturday night in a soulless place of sick people.

I was threatened with a catheter on Thursday when I couldn't give a urine sample. Never ruffled up a few drops of urine as fast in my life!
 
Just one day for a deep wisdom tooth removal,Mind you it was silly..i really didnt need to be there that long,They had me come in the morning around 8am and my surgery was not until about 2 pm,So for 6 hours i was sitting the side of a bed,Totally pointless and waste of bed space.

Dont know why they needed me in 6 hours prior,But hey ho.

I then slept for a good 4-5 hours after surgery in the hospital bed due to the anesthetic..my body doesn't like it much i was shaking a lot.
 
4 weeks in a German hospital following spinal surgery when I was stationed out there with the RAF.

At least German Hospital canteens have beer on tap :)
 
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