So why does society have this preconception of how boys "should" be and how girls "should" be? Did our ancestors all get together at some point in the past and decide "hey everyone, from now on we're all going to all raise our kids like this"? Or perhaps it's because men and women are naturally more disposed to certain roles?* It's not exactly far-fetched considering the huge biological difference when it comes to reproduction...
* Obviously this is a massive generalisation and there will be exceptions on both sides
Nature and nuture...there's no way to tell which is the cause unless one of them is significantly changed while the other isn't.
But we do know that nurture has a huge effect because it has been significantly changed and that has led to significant changes in various things.
We also know that sexed roles are at least partially caused by nurture. Partly because those two have changed significantly and partly because we know that sexed roles were essential for survival of societies for most of the existence of humans (and pre-human hominids). Small groups of people living as hunter-gatherers with stone age technology must enforce specific sexed roles or the group will die out. Existing sexed roles match up with those previously required ones, unsurprisingly.
So we have strong evidence that nurture plays at least a very large role in it. Maybe all of it. Maybe not.
It's a bit of a moot point, anyway. Regardless of how much is nature and how much is nurture, the fairest and most efficient thing to do today (i.e. now we don't live as small groups of hunter-gatherers) is to remove the nurture aspect, i.e. the sexed socialisation. That's true regardless of how much is nature and how much is nurture:
1) Extreme case - it's
all nature and that applies to
all people. If that's true, the socialisation is irrelevant and removing it will have no effect. Since it has no effect at all and takes up resources, there can be no valid objection to getting rid of it even in this most extreme possible scenario.
2) Extreme case - it's
all nurture and that applues to
all people. If that's true, the socialisation is completely unfair and wasteful. It has immense drawbacks and absolutely no advantages any more. It is everything bad and nothing good, so it should be got rid of.
3) A more realistic case - there's
some degree of a natural
trend towards some
average differences between men and women in
some things. If that's true, the socialisation is extremely unfair and wasteful because it restricts almost everyone to varying extents because only a few people would naturally completely match every sexed thing in every way to exactly the nurtured extent. Since it has huge drawbacks and no longer has any advantages, it should be got rid of.
Regardless of the degrees to which nature and nature contribute to the results, from one extreme to the other and everything in between, the nurture side should be got rid of.