Unpaid rent dispute

[Freakbro]

Blimey, your wife's sister and family don't have a home , and obviously couldn't afford the rent

But they could afford holidays, new clothes and gadgets....it doesn't sound like they couldn't afford it, just resented having to pay it to the sister

look at it from their point of view. Would you be happy if they were in a B&B?

They wouldn't be in it long if they didn't pay the rent....

Money is really not really important in this situation

You are saying that because of the family angle, but the sisters immediate attitude of being rude, aggressive, downright unpleasant about the situation and flatly refusing to pay anything isn't one I would expect from a family member either.

 

[TJM]

Blimey, your wife's sister and family don't have a home , and obviously couldn't afford the rent , look at it from their point of view.

Well, she did have a home, but she had to share it with her parents and that wasn't her first preference.

OP - Let the money go. A civil claim will - rightly or wrongly - make some members of the family sympathise with her. I would just make sure that the people who are already aware of the dispute are given the full facts (those text messages will be handy) and not extend the sister any future kindnesses.

 

[Efour]

Forget about it and put it down to experience.

This.

Its your Wifes Sister ffs...

I hope you both learned a lesson? Its not like you are deeply out of pocket.
You really want the complete BS of legal action small claims wrecking your relationship.
Nothing involving Money, friends and family goes smoothly.
Take satisfaction in telling her to do one but thats as far as id go.
GL if you do go further...

 

[tuftyfella]

the sister isnt in the process of paying 3k for a washing machine is she by any chance?

 

[tlrBeta]

Just remember what goes around comes around bud


THIS however is exactly the reason I never mix business with family - I'd never let my properties out to family - It's guaranteed trouble!!

Looks like the Mrs had to learn the hard way not to mix business and family

These things dont always end badly.

I rent a flat to my sister in law, no contract, all verbal.

Never missed rent, never an issue, quite simply she isnt a douche....which cant be said for the above issue.

 

[SpeedFreak]

Let it go for the sake of her parents but never do them a favour again. Eventually this will bite them in the behind as we all need family to help now and again.

A sister who is willing to essentially steal from her sibling is far lower than a stranger. A stranger has the excuse of it not being personal. For her sister to do it says a lot about her view of their relationship.

 

[Street]

Blimey, your wife's sister and family don't have a home , and obviously couldn't afford the rent , look at it from their point of view. Would you be happy if they were in a B&B?

Money is really not important in this situation.

We were more than generous in the first instance. We were then met with a torrent of abuse after we asked for some money (not all) when the first rent was late. After all, she can't expect us to pay for her to live. We have bills etc ourselves to pay. If it was a private landlord she'd have been out right away and in court already. We weren't expecting any of it, a token gesture would have been nice. But to be rude from the outset is not on.

the sister isnt in the process of paying 3k for a washing machine is she by any chance?

Not that I know of!

If she is stirring regarding it, might be worth the summons, just to burn her trollish ways, submit all the copied texts also.

What are the in-laws views on it all?
You said you can't visit if she is there, so how do they feel regarding it all?

She's stirring because she has got away with everything her whole life and no one has ever stood up to her. She is a bully pure and simple.

The parents don't want to get involved as they have to live with her. They've said themselves that she is a nightmare to live with but they won't speak out against it. She's always been a problem child, unfortunately she just carried it on to adulthood.

The problem is, my missus is effectively cut off from the family and she gets to carry on as if nothing has happened, she doesn't suffer any consequences from her actions.

 

[Akagi]

This.

Its your Wifes Sister ffs...

I hope you both learned a lesson? Its not like you are deeply out of pocket.
You really want the complete BS of legal action small claims wrecking your relationship.
Nothing involving Money, friends and family goes smoothly.
Take satisfaction in telling her to do one but thats as far as id go.
GL if you do go further...

I think its just the principal. OP doesn't want to let her get away with it and wants her brought to account for her unacceptable behaviour. Otherwise she will just carry on like it.

 

[Efour]

I think its just the principal. OP doesn't want to let her get away with it and wants her brought to account for her unacceptable behaviour. Otherwise she will just carry on like it.

I understand that, i really do, but i personally couldn't be bothered !

 

[Akagi]

I'd rather she look at me with resentment having paid the money whenever I encounter her, than risk her looking at me with smugness.

I suppose it depends what his missus' stance is on all this as to the sort of effect it could have. If she would rather just leave it, then perusing it might cause more issues than it solves.

 

[kindai]

It really comes down to do you want to make her pay up and then...

Can you?

Do they have enough tangible assets (cars maybe?) that if you send the HCEO's in they can get the money easily.

From your description of her, I'd be slamming her into court faster than she can blink twice if I knew there were enough assets easily available for HCEO's to seize.

 

[neil_g]

Sounds like she needs a smack down from the smug little perch she's on. Issue claim procedures against her I say, out of principle. It's most likely people not standing up to her that's made her this way.

I also find it amusing how many people would happily get screwed over a fair sum of cash just because they're blood.

Either way the family has broken down, on one hand you have the daughter/sister and on the other hand you have the parents who don't sound like they care and are happy to sit back with the "you know how she is.. You didn't need the money right?" attitude.

 

[Dis86]

I'd go to small claims against her. Cow.

 

[McPhee]

TBH if I ever did something like this, I expect making good of the situation would be part of being able to move back home. Seems a bit of a joke that the parents are keeping out of it, essentially reinforcing this entitled, carte blanche attitude. Why worry if mummy and daddy will always act as a safety net?

Learning that your actions have consequences is simply part of growing up. Failing to meet obligations without consequence and then rubbing other people's noses in it is childhood behaviour.

Still, probably best to leave it. Let someone else teach her the lesson. It'll happen one day, and it'll hurt. I highly doubt you guys will be there to help her out.

 

[Ricochet J]

It's not worth breaking ties with a sibling over a grand, irrespective who is at fault.

Keep it civil and don't get the courts involved. If the courts do get involved, then be prepared for all ties to be severed.

 

[Mr Joshua]

Lord it over her and her family whenever you meet them, make them aware that you see them as a charity case and they are forever in your debt.

 

[Burned_Alive]

Give her kids a voucher (each) for £500 spending money for Christmas and when they ask where it is, tell them you've already give it to their mum.

 

[McPhee]

Lord it over her and her family whenever you meet them, make them aware that you see them as a charity case and they are forever in your debt.

I guess that's the other way to go. Write the debt off with a smile. An incredibly smug smile. Be intolerable. Apologise for all the disagreements and arguments; you didn't realise they were too poor to pay such a modest rent. Tell her it's water under the bridge; you've now got tenants with decent jobs and the ability to pay.

Could turn in to a right wind up opportunity, and you'd indisputably own the moral high ground for writing off the debt.

 

[Street]

TBH if I ever did something like this, I expect making good of the situation would be part of being able to move back home. Seems a bit of a joke that the parents are keeping out of it, essentially reinforcing this entitled, carte blanche attitude. Why worry if mummy and daddy will always act as a safety net?

Exactly. If I ever did anything like that to my sister my dad would have given me a clip round the ear and told me to sort my act out. They are effectively taking her side by not mentioning it and allowing her to live there. She gets to carry on as normal and my missus is the one that gets upset.

Do they have enough tangible assets (cars maybe?) that if you send the HCEO's in they can get the money easily.

Plenty, including the new car they bought at the start of the year.

Give her kids a voucher (each) for £500 spending money for Christmas and when they ask where it is, tell them you've already give it to their mum.

If the kids were older, this would have been awesome!

We're going to have a proper talk about it over the weekend and see what the best course of action is. I'll speak to some legal people in work on Monday and see what they recommend. At the end of the day it's up to the missus as it's her property, but I'm fully up for being stubborn and going the whole way.. I'd probably even enjoy it too!

 

[McPhee]

I think you need to bear in mind there's a reasonable chance their parents will take her sister's side if you try to take her to court. It could end quite badly for your partner. You might get the money, but she might find none of her family are speaking to her for a while. Is it even worth the risk?

These situations have a habit of turning sour.