Asking a friend who is a photographer to do your wedding?

[mushtafa]

I would personally ask them, give them the choice.

Your friend is good at what he does, you like his work, you want to offer him work.

He'll like the fact you've asked him. Just make it clear it doesn't matter either way.

I hate it when people I know, use someone else for work and they know I'm in that trade.

 

[Puzzled]

The truth is chap, no-one wants to go to your wedding. No-one enjoys them, and he'd rather spend his day off sitting about relaxing.

So with that said, he'll be more than happy to get paid to shoot it, I would imagine. Should make the whole thing much more bearable.

Haha, so true. Weddings are just stressful

 

[Malevolence]

A friend of mine, and his now wife, completely did away with hiring a photographer for their wedding and just bought loads of those disposable cameras to scatter amongst the guests and to throw on the tables at the reception.

One of the guests was a bit of an amateur photographer, so he brought a long his kit and grabbed a few 'proper' wedding photos but everything else was from the disposables. The Groom is a rugby player and invited the team to the reception, so you can guess at what some of the photos were like.

 

[placeholder]

It depends entirely on your relationship with your mate.

I got married last month and one of my best mates plays in a band. I was out for a few pints with him and we were talking about what band I should hire for the reception. He looked at me quizzically and asked what was wrong with his band? I said they would be great but the lead guitarist was a guest at a wedding that day! Turns out he said he would be honoured to play at my wedding, really wanted to do it, and waived his fee for the night.

Now obviously its different because he got to enjoy the day too but the point is I had no idea how he would react so I decided not to ask him directly because he would feel obliged to say yes. I wanted him to enjoy my day. I would go elsewhere but tell him why you didn't ask him. A photographers role can be quite stressful and having a mate doing it could easily put a strain on your friendship. One thing Ive discovered when planning a wedding is people who have a disappointing photographer don't forget it in a hurry!!

 

[craptakular]

Raymond is doing my wedding. I plan on getting him drunk and accusing him of being unprofessional so I can save some cash.

If Raymond is drunk will his pictures not be blurred?

 

[Schizo]

If Raymond is drunk will his pictures not be blurred?

Raymond has a natural talent at blurring,either sober or drunk....hes a master at it

 

[Cosimo]

I've done it and had it done for us, stayed sober until almost the end.

 

[Kuros]

I'd honestly not want a friend to do my wedding, to be honest.

If I'm inviting them because I want them to be there at my wedding, I would want them to enjoy this fully.

 

[Roar87]

Why not just give him the option?

 

[gandhi]

I wouldn't ask personally. If they're your friend, they will want to enjoy the day with you rather than be at work?

 

[Casdawer]

Don't do it.

Let him enjoy the day with the rest of your guests!

 

[Phate]

Raymond is shooting my wedding. He's a good friend. We speak pretty much everyday and hang out...well before I jumped ship to Portugal anyway. He's also staying at mine before said wedding.

We spoke about this. On the day he is Mr Photographer. Before after and around it, he's Mondo.

 

[CaptainComedy]

CCTV cameras in all corners of the room. all you need.

 

[SexyGreyFox]

I think you should say "We really want you as a guest at our wedding but we also don't want to go behind your back and get another photographer, what would you like to do?"

 

[Pho]

I think you should say "We really want you as a guest at our wedding but we also don't want to go behind your back and get another photographer, what would you like to do?"

This. If you don't ask he'll probably be offended. He may even have a photographer friend he'll recommend who he knows will take great photos whilst he can enjoy the wedding.

 

[DB_SamX]

I think you should say "We really want you as a guest at our wedding but we also don't want to go behind your back and get another photographer, what would you like to do?"

+1

I've been asked to do two weddings, and I'm not even a pro. My friends just like my photos.

I told one I wouldn't do his wedding justice and would much rather just enjoy the day. Getting the photos wrong wasn't a risk I was willing to take, over potential friendship loss.

 

[mrk]

I've done it before a few times, it's fine to be professional and social at the same time in scenarios like that. But the mutual understanding has to go both ways of course.

 

[Loosecannon]

Ask him if he wants to do it. He might really want to do it as he would then be able to give you a wonderful gift in terms of the pictures that you can treasure. He might not want to do it because he wants to experience it from the other side and share you day without working.

Give him the choice and make it clear no pressure either way!

 

[Holst1981]

+1

I've been asked to do two weddings, and I'm not even a pro. My friends just like my photos.

I told one I wouldn't do his wedding justice and would much rather just enjoy the day. Getting the photos wrong wasn't a risk I was willing to take, over potential friendship loss.

Same for me.

I will still take my camera and take whatever photos I want.
Formal shots I won't bother, and I do stay out of the pro's way.
Last wedding I went to had lots of my shots in the album, which was a nice gift and I have a fun day with no pressure to produce anything.

I'm not a pro but I think I would still feel the same, most weddings I've been to recently have been close friends and we had a great time. I wouldn't want to work instead.

 

[EdGey]

Note to self, bring own water in car.

I've even shot my sister's wedding, I didn't think "I can't do it because it's my sister's wedding or I felt obliged to say yes" it's more of whether I think I can separate it and be professional.

I don't think you see what the OP's getting at.

You were professional on the job for your sister which is great, and judging by the work of yours I've seen in the past I'm sure you did a fantastic job. The question is though, should you have been? Should you not have relaxed and enjoyed yourself as a guest at your sisters wedding? I think that's the OP's dilemma.